Monday, October 08, 2007

Monday Night Football Live-Blog: Dallas at Buffalo Pregame/1st Half


I'll get things going at around 8pm with the Emmitt Smith Chronicles Parables. After that it's a trip to Buffalo as Tony Romo and the 'Boys take on Trent Edwards......yes, Trent Edwards and the Bills. Exciting I know!

Here's what you need to know:

When: 8:30 ESPN
Where: Ralph Wilson Stadium
Why: I have no idea why they're subjecting me to this game.
How: Dallas by a lot

Spread: Dallas -11, O/U 45
Weather: 74 Degrees, Partly Cloudy

Leave your predictions in the comments.....

8:02- Dirty, Sexy, Money looks great....that promo was awesome. Jerry Jones great actor.

Seriously, can someone tell what the hell is even going on with this pregame? I have no idea any point that these people are trying to make.

"I never pimp my quarterbacks."- Keyshawn Johnson

P.S.- That AWESOME "Dirty, Sexy, Money" skit will be up at halftime just so you can relive it's glory!

ESPN's pathetic football- 1
AA- 0
(Via Anon)

Sorry, but what does that mean?

HEADLINE: WANG PULLED IN NEW YORK

Let the Romollatio begin continue. Thanks for that term 289.

8:19- Get that 'Stache out of my dreams and into my car Ed Werder!

QUESTION: Is anyone else's coverage just cutting out in the middle of segments and going to commercial?

TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO

(Via 289)

"I have on the closed captioned module and i stil can't understand what Emmitt says. Maybe he would make more sense if I tried the SAP setting."- Anon

Umm, probably not. Words like pentrabilitation are not easily translated to Spanish.

4-0 Tribe, "This is absolutely amazing!"- Chip Caray

Settle down.

Oooh look at that! Chris Berman's likeness was carved into a tree. How cool!

"Tony Romo has the mentality to have the sense to make that play."- Emmitt Smith (Via 289)

Good lord.

"Is that really Joe Morgan and not Emmitt?"- Hollywood Wags

They are interchangeable at this point. Whoa some dude has a Jet Pack....should we all have one of those by now.
_________________________________________________

Let's get this s**t show started folks. I'm on the Bills tonight.....hope you can root against the 'Boys with me! Monday Night Football in Buffalo.....goes together like suicide and kool aid.

Please let Tony and Jaws do another duet.

"Romo Romo Romo"- Jaws
"Romo....Romo, Romo Romo"- Kornheiser

Wow Jaws says Trent Edwards reminds him of Tom Brady.

"Why would Dallas care about Buffalo? Because of Hot Wings???"- Tony Kornheiser
"Dallas probably has no idea who Trent Edwards is....I don't"- Tony Kornheiser

I hate him so much. No one has ever not belonged on a program more. Not Dennis Miller....not Rush Limbaugh....no one.

8:41- Did Suzy get a makeover on Tyra or something recently....she's looking pretty hot each week. I wanna kiss her.

Kid Rock, JLO, Thurman Thomas, AND Michael Irvin!!!!!!!!!!! No f'ing way!?!?!?!?11111001?!?! You just made my night.

(Please be coked up Irvin....please be coked up.)

What....was.....that? Buffalo looks fun. No really.

8:45- Kickoff goes to Buffalo and McGee has about 1 blocker on the play. Good job special teams. Oh nice! OJ Style throwbacks!!! Marshawn untouched until the secondary, first down Bills. Incomplete pass and then a scramble by Edwards....Losman would not have made that play.

3rd and 4......And Edwards hits Lynch in the hands.....drop. He heard footsteps.

Buffalo to punt.......NO!!!!!!! FAKE!!!!!!!!!!! Moorman for the first down!

"That is onions baby."- Kornheiser

8:51- Well thanks for making it exciting Buffalo. Two runs pick up very little and it's third and long for the Bills. A screen to Robert Royal gets nothing, and let's hope they fake it again.

Wow.....Moorman plants it at the two. Someone pull up the horse trailer.....wait, wrong network.

4-1 Indians with the Yankees threatening in the 2nd.

8:55- Romo is almost sacked for a safety on first down, and the Bills D is hyped! Jones....nothing. 3rd and 11 for the 'Boys.....

ROMO PICKED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOUCHDOWN BILLS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! George Wilson!!!

7-0 Bills!


Wow. That's a start. Good stuff.

"Was that rex grossman just now? when did he go to dallas?"- Mr. C

That was just ugly.

9:01- Thompson nothing on the return. Great call by Jaws on the Witten mistake. He hung Romo out to dry on that one. An encroachment penalty on the Bills leads to a Dallas first down.

ROMO PICKED AGAIN!!!!!!!!!! Great read by Crowell!!!

"In case anyone doesn't know, Anthony Thomas (A-Train) for Buffalo, went to Michigan, so expect Tirico to mention this 153 times."- Mookie

Oooh I forgot about that.

9:05- Romo gets a pep talk from T.O. and the Bills are back in business.

What's with the weird 6 Million Dollar Man music when Jaws analyzes a play? I never noticed that before.

Marshawn tries to jump over Dallas and that doesn't work. Buffalo is going for it on 4th down here. I'm hoping for some play action.....of course the Bills don't listen to me and Lynch isn't even close. Bad call. Momentum back to Dallas.

9:09- Wow, Mike Tirico got a minute's worth of highlights in about 10 seconds. Kudos.

Romo is shook, he sails one on Owens, and a delay on the next play.

"Here's the defense the Bills have been working on called the Creep....not named after you Tony."- Jaws

Contrived, Not Funny....please stop.

9:15- Bills are more than likely going to run the ball three times in a row now. Run, Screen......First Down? That's not right.

Jaws is all about people sticking feet into the ground.

Trent talks about Bill Walsh and is knocked down next play....incomplete. 3rd and long for the Bills. Edwards had about 5 minutes to throw it, but screens it to A-Train for a few. Bills Punt....Moorman! Moorman!

T.O. introduces the Dallas O....

"Just remember I need no introduction....I'M T.O."- Mike Tirico

Good call Mikey.

END OF THE 1ST, 7-0 BILLS We're staying in this spot because I'm lazy. I'll meet you under that pretty line right there.
___________________________________________

9:23- Bills are getting great pressure on Romo, and he should have been picked there for a third time by Greer, but no such luck.

3rd Down and Five and Romo gets blasted, but T.O. bails him out with a great catch. God I hate him, but he's so good. Oooh and a spiking the ball penalty on Owens.

touchdown cowboys (i refuse to give them caps) 7-7 romo to witten

9:33- Great play by Lynch in space and he hauls off a good one. An incompletion and a penalty for the Bills after a great play.

Roscoe Parrish just makes the dumbest move ever after a nice move, but somehow picks up the first down. Jaws praises him, but that was just stupid to try.

"You are so revved up, it's like you're on hot wings."- Kornheiser

Hey! A Lee Evans Sighting (and catch)!!!!

Langston Walker deserves to be bench after giving up on his quarterback, and there's a Cowboys' sack.

A Nice 3rd down pass to Lynch is followed by a screen to Robert Royal for nine. Lynch picks up the first and the Bills are inside the 10.

Tony K tries a Seinfeld reference as the Bills are floundering near the goalline. 3rd and Goal from the six. 1 yard completion and that was a waste. You know the Cowboys are scoring this drive.

10-7 Bills, 3:26 to go.

9:49-

"The last quarterback to throw to picks on his first two passes was Tommy Maddox 15 years ago. So that's like a decade and a half bad start."- Mike Tirico

What?

ROMO HAS A PASS TIPPED AND KELSAY GRABS IT FOR THE TD!!!!!!!!!!!

17-7


9:55- ANOTHER PICK!!!!!!!!!!! INTERCEPTION 4!!!!

"Did anybody see that Cowboys graphic flash by for a second that said aaaaaag? That made my day right there."- Anon

Oh the people did, and you may just want to see the photo for the second half live-blog.

Great completion by Edwards but it's negated by a Dockery hold they're going backwards.

ESPN Graphic: First quarterback to throw 4 ints in the first half since Kyle Orton.

You don't want to be in that company.

10:01- 54 Yarder is missed there, and the Bills are wasting opportunities.

"Please tell me the Bills' punter went to BYU. It'd be perfect."- Oops Pow Surprise

Sorry....Pittsburg State.....not Pittsburgh State.....Pittsburg State.

The Cowboys are trying to get into FG range.....3rd down and five.....First down Crayton! Romo got laid out and still got them to the line for the FG attempt. Folk........

Good! And you can tell how this one is ending up. 17-10 Bills, but that's not lasting.

I'll see you in a new thread after the break.

97 comments:

  1. Buffalo - Eleventy Billion
    Dallas - Verbal giving way to physical Romollatio.

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  2. By the way ESPN's been covering it I didnt realize the Bills are playing tonight

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  3. TO is playing.

    I just found that out.

    Thanks ESPN!

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  4. Jeezis, Emmitt played for the Cowboys?

    Man, I, uh, I did not know that...weird.

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  5. A TO UPDATE!!!!

    QUICK, GET TO A TV!!!!!!!!

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  6. You should see the folks in this town (Buffalo aka Almost Canada aka The Pleasure Capital of the World) they are treating this game as if the Olympics are coming to town. It's cute, really.

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  7. Is Jerome Bettis from Buffalo?

    How about Fred Smerlas?

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  8. The Tirico radio show subjected us today to Kelly and Therman both.

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  9. ESPN's pathetic football- 1
    AA- 0

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  10. Berman is yelling in that alky voice again...

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  11. Buffalo: 10 cheeze dogs
    Dallas: a glass of zinfandel

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  12. Michael Turner Overdrive.

    Good one Berman.

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  13. What the hell was that Dirty Sexy Moeny shit?

    Did Berman think Donald Sutherland was Alan Alda???

    That was insane, is everyone at ESPN on LSD?

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  14. Byrd vs. Wang

    Sometimes it's just too easy.

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  15. More insight, less inside man-love jokes.

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  16. Um, I'm white, what does "pimped my quarterback" mean?

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  17. TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO

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  18. Would it be funny, in a Mike Patrick sort of way, if Tony Romo got hit in the nuts on the first play and had to leave the game?

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  19. I have on the closed captioned module and i stil can't understand what Emmitt says. Maybe he would make more sense if I tried the SAP setting.

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  20. Parcells is the voice of God telling Jesus Romo what to do.

    Give him 10 more Lord Parcells from Joisey.

    Jeezis fucking CHRIST.

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  21. Emmitt Smith is awesome.

    "Tony Romo has the mentality to have the sense to make that play."

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  22. Berman's voice sounds like a drunk frog's. Waddle waddle.

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  23. You need to have someone make plays and steppup to make something happen, make plays happen, becuzz you need someone to make plays.

    Is that really Joe Morgan and not Emitt?

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  24. So if the Cowboys lose tonight next weeks game automatically becomes shitty?

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  25. Can they mention the Cowboys/Pats game anymore?

    I'm shocked, that game is actually on CBS and not ESPN!!!

    What's going on aht there!!!

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  26. go bills...i'm eating buffalo wings tonight and it was planned...

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  27. EEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

    I really wish my connection to tickets didn't have to give them to someone else.

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  28. Over-Under on the number of ejaculations by Jaws for Tony ROMO

    34

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  29. Wow, Tafoya with the editorial oversight to make shit up

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  30. Suzy X and O, Miss Success, talks about Romo's family. Hard hitting analysis.

    Jayne Kennedy at least tried to talk football and not gushy soap opera shit. Phyllis George too.

    Well, most of the time.

    WHy are these people involved with the fucking NFL?

    J LO?

    What the hell...unreal.

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  31. Nice opening spot with "real Buffalo fans"... It's like ESPN wants me to hate football.

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  32. I'm going to go ahead and say that the Bills need to replace Marshawn Lynch with the punter. What a glorious cutback.

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  33. Way to waste that fake punt you stupid assholes...Go 'Boys!!!!!!!

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  34. When will Kid Rock start paying royalties to the WHite Stripes?

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  35. Moorman's wife by the way is the hottest woman I've ever seen in person. And is a sweetheart.

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  36. Romo, what in the hell was that?

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  37. And Romo tosses his first touchdown of the night!

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  38. TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO

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  39. Thanks for making me eat shit, Romo...can I have mustard next time?

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  40. was that rex grossman just now? when did he go to dallas?

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  41. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  42. In case anyone doesn't know, Anthony Thomas (A-Train) for Buffalo, went to Michigan, so expect Tirico to mention this 153 times.

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  43. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  44. What? Trico is not following ESPN rules. He said Wilson scored his first NFL touchdown. He should have said his first "Monday Night Football" touchdown.

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  45. THANK FUCKING GOD AGAIN!!!

    LMAO

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  46. TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO TONY ROMO

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  47. a plague of injuries and defections? more like everyone you say is the plague, tony

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  48. Sigh, 2 for Romo, he's dead to me.

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  49. Another pick on a throw to Jason Witten. You still sure you want to build a team around him there, Tuna?

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  50. I look at Korny, I think ONIONS.

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  51. I know this site is "Awful Announcing," but it's so refreshing to have Jaws around to break down film of big plays as they happen, and not Joe Theismann spewing some nonsense about "making plays" or "competing."

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  52. 4th and 1 at the 35? Christ, you'd better go for it.

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  53. Storytelling, by Mike Tirico, with co-telling by Suzy Success.

    Has Tony Korn EVER played ANY sport? Ridden a bike?

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  54. This is the first MNF game I've caught from the start, Jaws is great. Tony is downright awful.

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  55. Romo has Manning eyes going on.

    LMAO

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  56. NBA 2K8, we don't have the dumb glitches EA has.

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  57. I love this dingbats commercial.

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  58. Yeah, it's like he doesn't even belong TAWLKING about sports on tv. That annoying LAWNG OILIN accent...

    At least Miller was sometimes funny.

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  59. We don't actually play the sports, wags. Much less dangerous to stay in the front office.

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  60. I'm sorta saying, you know, as a kid, or as a young guy...

    I don't expect that hapless schmuck to get out in the fresh air and exercise.

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  61. I tihnk that little sound effect was put together by Bob Moog.

    Well, if he were alive.

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  62. is it me or does witten look like he wants to piss himself anytime he gets a defender within 2 feet of him?

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  63. I think I'd rather face the Predator than have to tackle Barber.

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  64. YEEEEEEEEE-HAWWWWWWWWWW

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  65. Buffalo has a downtown?

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  66. Did anybody see that Cowboys graphic flash by for a second that said aaaaaag? That made my day right there.

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  67. once again i'm joining late...fucking yankees don't deserve to win after leaving about 12 guys on base in the first 3 innings...what's going on in this game? i like the bills throwbacks

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  68. (To Jaws) It's like you're on hot wings? I don't even now what to say to that one, Tony.

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  69. i wonder if OJ is watching this game and remembering the times when he wasn't a violent murdering bastard...

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  70. I don't think OJ was never not a murdering bastard, he just didn't have the balls to cut two people's throats at the time.

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  71. Tony is repeating himself.

    Jeezis why is he on THE FUCKING TV????

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  72. Well, the Bills are doing what you have to do to beat the 'Boys...keep their offense off the field.

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  73. ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO

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  74. at least Romo has 3 touchdown passes tonight.

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  75. So why does ESPN have forty anaylsts whom all picked DAL.

    LOL

    Everyone seems to have forgotten Romo's propensity for turtling and crumbling under stress.

    Morons.

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  76. ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO ROMO

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  77. This just might be the greatest game ever for a QB...when the 'Boys come out next half and win the game after Romo throwing 4 INT's in the first half.

    Has that ever happened?

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  78. Yeah Kyle Orton did it...

    Well, maybe not.

    Terry Bradshaw did it. Because Romo is the next coming of GOD, he will too.

    SUZZEEEEE!!!

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  79. Please tell me the Bills' punter went to BYU. It'd be perfect.

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  80. And we're only down by 7!

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  81. Chris Berman: Didn't know if you knew that Christopher Columbus took a lexus across the Atlantic. WOW. what's gayer, that comment or Chris Berman himself?

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  82. "Brad Johnson took off his headset, and put on his helmet. I'm not sure what that means, but we'll see what happens". Michele Tafoya, and I 80% quote word for word.


    Okay, that means that if Romo throws 4 picks in a half, and they are losing, that MAY just mean that Johnson thinks he may be playing soon.

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