Friday's Winners

"It's nice of Greg Oden's daddy to hold his crutches for him. ("Greg Oden looks old" reference #5,362)"- Anon
"Somewhere, a stilt walker from the circus is waking up with a concussion after a vicious mugging in which his stilts were stolen to be sold on the medical black market."- Brave Sir Robin
""Oh, these? Tyrannosaurus femurs. Killed it myself.""- Unemployed Journalist
"The old shepherd watches wearily over his flock."- Mark
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Are you funny enough to make a caption for this photo of Game 2 losing Pitcher Eric Gagne? (Thought you Boston Fans would have fun with this one.)

Daily Links:
Jerry Punch Is Not Doing So Well On NASCAR (Daly Planet)
This Probably Should Have Been Its Own Post, But FOX 25 Completely Ignores The Anthem (Homerun Derby)
Enough About The Yankees (I'm Writing Sports)
Somebody Has An Anniversary Chicago! (Sports by Brooks)
Dennis Franchione....Not So Bright (We Suck At Sports)
Boston Fans Are Weird (Red Sox Monster)
Why Is South Florida Not Up In The Polls Again? (Meaningful Collateral)
Hockey's Back And So Is Engblom's Hair (The Sports Hernia)
The NHL Is Getting Their Own Channel (Sports Media Journal)
Reggie Theus Is A God! (Ballsiest)
Whatever Happened To Good Sports Movies? (Sons of Sam Malone)
CBS Is Taking Away HD In Some Parts (First and Ten Inches)
Purple Jesus! (Chicago Bull)
Top 10 Sports Moments In Seinfeld History (Armchair GM)
Who Would You Do? Weis or Holtz??? (Strike Zones and End Zones)
.....and Lastly........
I apologize, but I'm canceling the live-blog for tonight. Unless somebody wants to step up and volunteer.....I'm skipping the thing because something came up. Hit me up if you want to do the Football Game or Baseball Game tonight....if not we'll just skip it.
Francona had seen enough after watching Gagne jog out of the bullpen.
ReplyDeleteFrancona: "Here! Take the ball. I want to go home already."
ReplyDeleteGagne realizes that even a full beard can't disguise his lowsy pitching.
ReplyDeleteFrancona pulls Gagne out of the game, and then pulls the Indians foot out of ass on his way to the dugout
ReplyDeleteDammit, next time I want to lose a game in extra innings, I'll call Simon Gagne to pitch!
ReplyDeleteNothing is over! Nothing! You just don't turn it off! You asked me I didn't ask you! And I did what I had to do to win, for somebody who wouldn't let us win! Then I come back to the world, and I see all those maggots at the airport, protestin' me, spittin', callin' me a baby killer and all kinds of vile crap! Who are they to protest me?! Huh?! Who are they?! Unless they been me and been there and know what the hell they yellin' about!
ReplyDelete"See this ball? Its one more than you have"
ReplyDelete"YOU FANS DO NOT TALK TO ME LIKE THAT !!!
ReplyDeleteI SAVED 84 GAMES IN A ROW !!!
I WORK TOO HARD TO DEAL WITH THIS STUFF !!!
I DRIVE...I DRIVE...I DRIVE A DODGE STRATUS !!!"
MVP! MVP! MVP!
ReplyDelete"At least now I can go in the clubhouse and watch Frank TV. I wonder if he does an imitation of me sucking."
ReplyDelete"Have you seen my baseball?"
ReplyDeleteShit. I called for Gagne, not Seth Rogen!
ReplyDeleteI was distracted by Bill Simmons and Dane Cook sucking face in the third row, sorry.
ReplyDelete2003 - Game Over
ReplyDelete2007 - Career Over
If only strikeouts nested in my beard.
ReplyDeleteToday, a first in sports history...Oakley created the first-ever reverse sponsorship today, where they paid Eric Gagne not to wear their glasses anymore.
ReplyDeleteFrancona inspects the Fenway Park pitcher's mound for the steaming dump Eric Gagne took upon it during the 11th inning of Game 2.
ReplyDeleteFrancona: Give Me Garces.
ReplyDeleteGagne: You mean, Rich Garces?
Francona: I know he hasn't had a lot of success against this guy, but I got a feeling he's due.
Francona: Now I want you to take this
ReplyDeleteGagne: Yes....
Francona: And shove it up your.......
Gagne: Okay
The Curse of the Bambino is dead.
ReplyDeleteBut the ghosts of Bob Stanley and Calvin Schiraldi are still alive and well.
Dane Cook gets his wish to pitch for the Sox
ReplyDeleteIn the season premiere of "Lost", we see Jack pitching for the Sox, and begin to understand why he said they'd all have been better off if they'd just stayed on the island.
ReplyDeleteAre you funny enough to make a caption for this photo of Game 3 losing Pitcher Eric Gagne?
ReplyDeleteNot only do you run one of the best blogs on the web, but you can see the future.
Whoops....thanks for breaking that to me so delicately, but it's probably going to be true.
ReplyDeleteFrancona (whispering to Gagne): Jesus man...are those cutoff sleeves under your jersey? I told you that Bellachick sh*t doesn't work on the mound. Just try not to screw up again...my inlaws are here!
ReplyDeleteYou found the check that Steinbrenner left for my personal assistant Roy, didn't you? Son of a bitch.
ReplyDeleteF*ck You Eric.
ReplyDelete"give me the f**king ball eric, your a bigger waste then the money spent on the Whos Now segement."
ReplyDeleteOh my god Eric! You really did shit yourself! I thought you were just making an analogy or one of those meta-simile things. Wow...this is awkward. Well um, why don't you just go hit the showers? You've really stunk er, put us in the dumps, I mean...oh hell, you suck. Go home Eric.
ReplyDeleteEric Gagne says, "Terry, I know I am at that age I should be having prostate exams, but isn't giving me one on the mound right now rather ridiculous???"
ReplyDeleteLife was so much better in LA where the fans left after the 7th inning and weren't around to boo me.
ReplyDelete