Thursday, June 05, 2008

NBA Finals Live-Blog: Game One


Who: L.A. Lakers at Boston Celtics
What: Game One of the NBA Finals
Where: TD Banknorth Garden- Boston, Massachusetts
When: 9pm (ABC)
Why: To repair Kobe's image so people forget he's such an asshat and/or to win the Larry O'Brien Trophy
Spread: Celtics -3, O/U 192 (Series Price: Lakers -175, Celtics +155)

The fun gets underway around 8 something with videos and pregame goings on (i.e.- Kimmel). Feel free to leave predictions and hate comments for Stephen A. Smith in the comments.
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So the Kimmel thing is happening after every game and I'm pretty sure that's going to get annoying quick. I remember when his show first started it game after a Super Bowl. The NBA Finals aren't the Super Bowl, but this year's numbers should be a good vehicle.

So Jimmy starts out with a humorous game of one on one with Shaq, and then we find out that Magic Johnson is on the show. Ugh. Well at least we also get the Spelling Bee champ and Puffy as well. I'm upset Bill Simmons won't be making an appearance though.

"He's like the white Larry Bird this guy."- Jimmy Kimmel on Basketball trickster Tim Nolan

Oooh Erin Andrews is there for the Spelling Bee thing and she's looking extra tan today! I would have pulled the video but it was pretty boring (outside of EA's low cut shirt).


I think Jimmy Kimmel should wait till Erin Andrews sunburn wears off before inviting her on next time....Sorry to insult the golden child AA, but now a good appearance for EA. (Via Steve)

Seriously. Magic has to be approaching Shaq-like size these days.

"Don't get me in trouble with my employee."- Magic (That would be employER Magic)

And we're live from Boston. Kobe comes in wearing a gold tie and looking pimp and Garnett looks like Morpheus with a long suit coat. Straight pimping.

"Sometimes you have to manufacture drama, not here."- Stuart Scott (So you admit it?)

Damn Magic is everywhere tonight. How did he get from L.A. to Boston in 10 minutes?!?!?! I love the Dropkick Murphys but if I never hear "Shipping up to Boston" again I'll probably be okay.

The other networks aren't even trying tonight. Two hours of "So You Think You Can Dance?" for FOX. (Via The Fourth)

Hahaha Seriously. I was just put in a trance by Bill Bellamy on Last Comic Standing. You can now add Mike Breen's goatee to the "Gus Johnson Hall of Fame for Bad Facial Hair".

"Carlos Boozer, you've got to make the Lakers pay. Boozer did it earlier in the Playoffs."- Jon Barry

Didn't Boozer have a collection of his worst games as a Pro against the Lakers? Like a commenter mentioned recently.....I don't really want advice from a guy that averaged 4.3 ppg and 16.9 mpg in his career. That James Taylor is so hot right now.

Okay, let's do this. Wait Chris Mihm is still on the Lakers? When did that happen (or not happen)???

Am I the only one who thinks the giant Larry O'Brian Trophy at mid-court is tacky? (Via Anon)

No not at all....I never understand why they make the thing so damn big.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! I just got goosebumps and Brian Scalabrine just got a lot darker for this game. Maybe he's on the Erin Andrews tanning plan....


Pretty sure that's Tony Allen, ABC. I could be wrong though. And we're just about ready for the tip. HAHAHAHAHAHA, okay that really is Evil Mike Breen. The goatee and the band aid? Priceless.



Wow, Doc Rivers actually sounded inspirational for once. Simmons, eat your heart out. (Via Dan)

Seriously. That was a great speech. Okay the tip is coming up after the commercial. I'm going to try and not bog you down with game talk between the quotes, so if you have something to say....speak up and you'll see it here.

The Lakers get out to an early two point lead and apparently there's only 1:11 left in the first quarter. They fix the clock problems and Rondo misses a jumper. Odom hits a jumper after a Kobe steal and the Lakers go up four. Nice layup by Pierce but he commits a dumb shooting foul on Derek Fisher at the other end.

"Hard to hear the whistle, this place is loud."- Mike Breen

Seriously. I can barely hear JVG when he chimes in. 10-8 Lakers with 7 minutes left in the quarter.......Wait, we're tied. Garnett jams one home. Great move and the crowd gets even louder. Bryant misses two shots in a row and Pierce follows with one of his own. There's are first timeout halfway through the first.....10-10.

"Garnett attacking the rim, MY GOODNESS!"- Mark Jackson

"These guys are banging quite a bit down low."- Mike Breen (Via SS Reporters)

Kobe finally hits one with 5 minutes left, and the pace is starting to slow down. Rad has two fouls and The Machine comes in. Pretty shots traded by Garnett and Gasol and we're tied again. A great move by Rondo but he misses the layup and the Lakers commit a backcourt violation which the ABC crew disagrees with.

Ray Allen schools The Machine and hits a three and there's a Lakers timeout with the Celts up 5.

And the grotesque trophy on the floor has already caused one missed call... how many more? I say the over under is 4.5 for this game. And more than a feeling? really? who the hell is picking the audio today? (Via Dan)

Yeah that was definitely a violation and I don't even think the guys got the rule right. If you have one leg over and you pass back isn't that backcourt?

Q: I survived a Japanese game show? Are TV execs even trying any more? (Via Mr. Cheekz)
A: No (Via AA)

MACHINE MAKE THREE! I don't think I've seen him miss during these Playoffs.

"I've got a play....post Garnett."- Jeff Van Gundy

Alley Oop to Garnett! He misses? His whole body was above the rim. How did he miss that??? Bryant hits a short jumper and we're tied again (I have a feeling I'm going to be saying that a lot). Wait...The Machine misses. PJ BROWN is a beast...I'm just sayin'.

That's the quarter folks and a good one at that. Celts are up two. 23-21.

I believe Mike Breen now qualifies for the first ever "announcer playoff beard". You hear that Buck, start growing some facial hair! (Via Steve)

Hahahaha. Now that would be awesome. Hey Michele is there! I don't care and subs galore come into the game. Cassell, Powe, Walton, Turiaf, Brown, and Posey are all in....I might change the channel. Does Cassell ever not take a shot when he's on the court? I mean he made it, but that was a terrible look.

"They just showed Phil Jackson, he's 80 years old and he looks great!"- Jeff Van Gundy

Oh great....here come the jokes. Paul Pierce has done nothing this game at all but the Celts are still up five. They need to make this lead bigger with Kobe on the bench. Wait, "Start Me Up"? Who does ABC think is watching these games???

That was Tex Winter Jeff mentioned AA, not Phil Jackson. (Via Steve)

Whoops...my bad. Anywho, Celts up two still but Pierce is going to the line. I'm not gonna lie but this game is kind of boring. Garnett hits two and Boston is up three. Does anyone know if Derek Fisher's shots actually cause rain to fall? Bad call by Bavetta on Gasol there.

Offensive foul on Kobe Bryant who absolutely wanted to destroy Cassell there. Sam then conveniently misses a three. Time for Rondo to come back in. Lead is 5 for Boston.

By the way Adam Sandler...I will mess with the Zohan. You may have your most retarted character since Billy Madison. (Via Steve)

Ouch. Paul Pierce picks up his third foul. Actually he's not really doing anything so it might not be bad to get him a break. Gasol with the dunk and the lead is one. Posey misses a three and this is the time of the game where Boston looks completely lost offensively. Lakers take the lead.

"Very poor pick and roll coverage tonight by the Celtics."- Jeff Van Gundy

You think? Two dunks in the last five possessions might have been a hint. Timeout Boston with the Lakers on a 10-2 run. 45-42 L.A. with 3 minutes left in the half. And thanks to SD we've got our first retarded Boston fan of the Series! I give you "Guy in Pink Garnett Jersey"....



ABC is going through some audio problems now. Great. The Lakers are controlling this thing now as Mark Jackson tells us that Magic Johnson is the best point guard ever and it's not close. Oscar Robertson was pretty damn good.

And that's your half. The Lakers turned it on at the end there and lead by 5. I could care less about the Halftime Show and those jokers so I'll probably see you in 15 or so. Keep those comments coming....

51-46 Lakers at the half

Damn. Sorry about that delay I tried to pull that Magic-Bird commercial and my computer just completely shutdown on me. We're back on now and Paul Pierce just went down with a crippling knee injury to both himself and the Celtics. That's not good.

Lakers are up three halfway through the third and now Perkins is hurt too. Good lord. Ray Allen hits a three though and we're tied again. HOLY CRAP!!!!!!!!!!!

THAT'S PAUL PIERCE'S MUSIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



It's not exactly Willis Reed-esque but that was awesome (and probably staged).

AA, you're getting a little too much Simmons lately I think... although it's "Good lord" or a variation of that rather than "Holy Crap," haha. Playing on a sprained knee (or sprained anything, really) takes a lot of guts, it'll be interesting to see how Pierce responds. (Via Dan)

You're right....I apologize. Boston has pushed the lead to four near the end of the third, but Garnett fouls The Machine on a three. Perkins is coming back, but I'm pretty sure he's not going to get the ovation that Pierce did.

WOW! Alley oop to Kobe....now we're playing. L.A. up one with Rondo on the line.

"Rondo to Pierce.....BANG!"- Mike Breen

Celts up one......AND ANOTHER PIERCE THREE! Now this is what I'm talking about. Kobe hitting oops, Pierce nailing back to back threes.......Welcome to the Finals!

Kobe misses a three and PP hops on the bike. That's your quarter....and unbelievable shot by The Machine which doesn't count.

77-73 Celtics

Leon Powe with a great offensive rebound and he gets fouled. Mike Breen with best wishes to Senator Ted Kenneday and count that as something I'd never hear during an NBA broadcast. Whoever called Sam Cassell missing key shots late in the game was right....that was nasty.

Huge work by the bench players and the Celtics go up eight with a Posey three. And yet ANOTHER Boston song going to the break. I think that was "Smokin'".

Someone get Sam Cassell off the damn court. That last shot was terrible....well not as bad as Turiaf's jumper just now. Derek Fisher is like the anti-Cassell. He hits another jumper. Boston up six. Hahahahaha and now Cassell lets the clock expire....come on Doc.

Machine hit jumper, lead go to four. Here comes the Lakers' bench! Timeout.

86-82 Celtics, 5:48 left

Way to slide a Hancock promo in there ABC. Bryant is off again and Pierce hits yet another fadeaway. Gasol misses a wide open jumper and Rondo misses on the other end, but Brown is there for the O-Reb and the foul.

I feel like this announcing team has no heart tonight, especially for the situation. I'm barely feeling any excitement watching this, and I was excited for Spurs/Lakers. And I have no real favoritism here (/half-hearted Knick fan). Breen doesn't do much for me, especially how he played damage control when Pierce got hurt. I actually like Van Gundy, just... not feeling it tonight. Just kinda... going through the motions. The Game 1 motions. (Via Zak)

I hear you to a degree Zak. They're calling a pretty good game, but the energy isn't exactly translating.

"I can't believe you're trying to get brownie points with the camera crew."- Mark Jackson to JVG

WOW! An And One from Odom cuts it to six and keeps the Lakers in the game. Six point lead. Make that five. 3 minutes to go....

Gasol to the line after what looked like a good block. Six point lead still. Miss. Make. Rondo gets to the line for the Celts after a nice move at midcourt. Make. Miss.....out of bounds on the Lakers. 1:45 left....

DAMN! Kevin Garnett comes with the THUNDA!!!!!!!!!!!!! That's a video. Wow.

"GARNETT ON THE FOLLOW!" - Mike Breen (Via Zak)

Still a six point game though. Garnett is feeling it though and he's fouled on the drive. Makes both....eight point lead with a minute left. Kobe misses a three and Garnett grabs the board. KG misses on the other end and L.A. brings it back down. Fisher misses the three and the Lakers finally foul with only 16 seconds left.

Ball Game. Game One goes to the Celts. Great second half and a good job by Breen, Jackson, and JVG. Videos and such to follow. Thanks for sticking around and I'll see you Sunday night.

98-88

123 comments:

  1. I'm going with the Celtics in six. And Stephen A. with Chris McKendry makes me want to slit my wrists.

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  2. Jamal Mashburn got caught getting some last minute "touchups" for the makeup artist.

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  3. Are the Lakers and Celtics playing in the NBA finals? I hadn't heard.

    I say..hmm....wow...im going to say lakers in five

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  4. This is now the greatest show ever...Erin Andrews was just on!!!

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  5. I think Jimmy Kimmel should wait till Erin Andrews sunburn wears off before inviting her on next time....

    Sorry to insult the golden child AA, but now a good appearance for EA.

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  6. Thank goodness for standard definition then.

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  7. Haha seriously Steve....that was a little much.

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  8. Am I the only one not understanding the whole basketball trickster guy thing? Is the fact that he's messing up supposed to be funny? I'm tempted to believe that it's fake.

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  9. Glad to see Magic hasn't let himself go after he retired.

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  10. It has to be fake. Sal has those lines waiting, and they cut back to Kimmel pretty seamlessly.

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  11. Did Erin Andrews just say that she thought slathering on sunscreen was sexy?

    That's what I get for believing a woman.

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  12. I can't see the Kimmel show because of local news at 5:00 PM.

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  13. Btw, is this on ABC, b/c LA is showing local news.

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  14. You're not really missing anything SS.

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  15. I believe that Kimmel's show will air after the game on the west coast.

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  16. That's right Fourth....forgot about that.

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  17. This game better be good...I am staying up past my bedtime for this.

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  18. Stuart Scott, except for James Posey and Sam Cassell, it's the first Finals appearance for EVERYONE!

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  19. i guess tnt didnt mind for magic to be on abc. unlike ernie johnson, stu scott always has to get a final word in. too bad.

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  20. Ummm...that is what the hosts usually do. Get the final word in and take it to a break.

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  21. The other networks aren't even trying tonight. Two hours of "So You Think You Can Dance?" for FOX.

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  22. Wait a minute, Kobe has teammates?

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  23. Get rid of that goatee Breen.

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  24. Looks like Mike Breen's evil twin is doing the game tonight

    GOATEE - EVIL

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  25. Hah. ESPN is re-airing the Spelling Bee. They don't care either.

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  26. No matter how many times they show me a Zohan commercial, it's will never be funny.

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  27. Anyone know anything about that NBC show Fear Itself? I'm a big wuss (like Tiger Woods) so I don't know if I'd watch it.

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  28. I don't know about you, but I can't wait for that Wipeout show.

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  29. At the tip, Bynam hits Kobe with a chair, all the Lakers not named Kobe rip off their jerseys to reveal Celtics' jerseys. One big FU to Kobe for dissing them during the off season.

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  30. JAMES TAYLOR?!!

    You've got to be kidding me?

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  31. James Taylor: way to hit that target demo.

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  32. Nice shot of Doc singing the anthem.

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  33. In other news, Joe Buck will be singing the National Anthem for Game 2.

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  34. "Now Introducing...Players You Never Heard of Before!"

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  35. Am I the only one who thinks the giant Larry O'Brian Trophy at mid-court is tacky?

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  36. And the Kobe vile spitting by AA begins. This fuels my fire for rooting against Boston in this series.

    Also, I just listened to Tessie on my baseball video game. That has something to do with it.

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  37. God after watching the 87 finals yesterday, the pre game entrances are so much better with no music at all

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  38. Requiem for a Dream soundtrack. I like it!

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  39. I like in this opening montage, their are clips of the 99 finals between Spurs - Knicks .. terrible

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  40. Breen has a bandage on his head?


    Got to be shaving.

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  41. Mike Breen is boycotting makeup, I see.

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  42. Note to Mike Breen: The Nelly look is out of style...and it's not on the eyebrow, dawg.

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  43. Looks like Breen got in a bar fight last night - his left eye looks a bit shifty.

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  44. I love the ABC Finals montage, but it still can't compare with the old NBC intros.

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  45. Mike Breen seems to go back and forth between goatee and no goatee, no sure which one I like most.

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  46. Uh... so did Breen try to shave his forehead and knicked (no pun intended) himself? What's with the bandaid?

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  47. wow, doc rivers actually sounded inspirational for once. simmons, eat your heart out.

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  48. '' She wouldn't say that, Would you ? ''

    yeah i would say nothing exciting ever happens in the WNBA

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  49. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UooitEU6AtE


    Just for the heck of it...the NBA on NBC intro.

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  50. This pre tip-off commercial break is ridiculous. I don't care about a real life grey's anatomy.

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  51. Big question: what time do you think this game will end? I'm saying 12:24. Damn, can they start a little earlier?

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  52. The midcourt trophy is just ridiculous.

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  53. In case anyone is wondering, the Canadian pre-commercial break wasn't any better, unless you like watching car commercials.

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  54. God TSN is a horrible sports network up here, could give 2 craps about the NBA

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  55. "These guys are banging quite a bit down low."- Mike Breen

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  56. TSN is ESPN's sister station so that explains it.

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  57. runnin' down a dream... i don't know if that's a better or worse choice than the rob thomas finals a couple of years ago.

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  58. and for anyone interested in the canadian commercials, we have: meet the spartans dvd trailer, ford truck commerical (voiced by jack bauer), boring speed stick commerical, boring armor-all wipes commerical, creept home depot gift card commercial (with talking orange box) and two tsn promo ads.

    i thought the nba finals (especially such a "storied rivalry" as this one) was supposed to command big bucks for commercials? it's no super bowl, but that crap above is the same stuff tsn shows EVERY break...

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  59. And the grotesque trophy on the floor has already caused one missed call... how many more? I say the over under is 4.5 for this game.

    and more than a feeling? really? who the hell is picking the audio today?

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  60. I survived a Japanese game show? Are TV execs even trying any more

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  61. By the way, JVG wants the Lakers to post up on Garnett.

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  62. Survived Japanese Game Show = Ninja Warrior with white people.

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  63. I believe Mike Breen now qualifies for the first ever "announcer playoff beard".

    You hear that Buck, start growing some facial hair!

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  64. If Cassell plays more than 10 minutes this game, the Celtics lose. Hell, if he plays more than 6 minutes, that might be enough.

    Of course, as I type that, he knocks down a shot.

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  65. Sam Cassell made a shot? Didn't see that coming.

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  66. That was Tex Winter Jeff mentioned AA, not Phil Jackson.

    And I don't know what was more stunning: Tex being 80 or JVG being 46?

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  67. I made up a drinking game for the announcers a while ago, check it out.

    http://ssreporters.wordpress.com/2008/05/29/the-breen-jackson-and-van-gundy-drinking-game/

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  68. 1) that boxing analogy was terrible. thanks for nothing, jackson.

    2) i officially quit on the music. bring back rob thomas!

    3) sam cassell is just setting himself up to miss a lot of shots in the second half

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  69. Or JVG could have been talking before about ageless ref wonder Dick Bavetta....

    I don't know if he's 80, but he does NOT look good for whatever age he is.

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  70. By the way Adam Sandler...I will mess with the Zohan. You may have your most retarted character since Billy Madison.

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  71. that was clearly a blocking foul on cassell. i like his near air-ball 3 to follow

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  72. Lakers look very good even with Kobe struggling so far.


    And that of course means Kobe is going to tear them up anyway.

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  73. I see MJ has traded Cuba Gooding Jr. in for Charlie Sheen.

    When's this game gonna end btw? O/U Midnight

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  74. Steve, give me the over. it won't be done until almost 12:30, I bet.

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  75. Ellen Pompeo is a big time celebrity? LA laughs at your celebrities Beantown!

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  76. I agree that this game is boring. Might I suggest a couple of alternatives? 300 on HBO and The Professional on Encore

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  77. Kobe is 3-10 and he gets the interview.

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  78. so AA, are you ready for 3-6 more boring games just like this one? live blogging the whole series, yes?

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  79. Living in Charlotte, Jordan is more visible with his Haynes commericals than he is running the Bobs.

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  80. I think for fairness to balance it out, ABC should have Tommy Heinsohn as a guest on the pre game show for Game 2.

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  81. I'm just glad you all are here to keep me entertained. This game is putting me to sleep for some reason. I'll step it up for the second half though.

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  82. Oh good God...that split screen commercial with Bird and Magic reminded me of the last frame of the old "incredible hulk" tv show for some reason

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  83. seriously, a Magic/LB spot? that was awful, and they've both gained a ton of weight since they stopped playing... i understand the rivalry, but that was just pure cheese.

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  84. and also, stuart scott was doing his best mike breen impressed (droopy left eye and all, he was just missing the bandaid), AND he added incredibly lop-sided glasses.

    thank goodness for the marvels of HD.

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  85. I better get to see more of Stephan A. Smith singing along to the in-house music.

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  86. Pierce hurt seriously = Celtics Dead

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  87. kobes warming up...and his passing is on point.

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  88. Perkins is limping and the Cs are in trouble.

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  89. Wow, if Pierce is back in this could be a springboard to victory now.


    This game is pretty good actually AA.

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  90. AA, you're getting a little too much Simmons lately I think... although it's "Good lord" or a variation of that rather than "Holy Crap," haha

    Playing on a sprained knee (or sprained anything, really) takes a lot of guts, it'll be interesting to see how Pierce responds.

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  91. Best timeout taker?

    Wow.....

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  92. Between the oop and the drained j in the double team, not to mention the passing, i dont think the celtics want it with kobe in the 4th quarter...

    although maybe PP has something to say about that.

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  93. taking full credit for being the one to call cassell's bricks, AA.

    also, the slo-mo replay confirmed that KG was DEFINITELY committing a backcourt violation - his foot clearly touched the ground. bavetta can't see that far though, likely.

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  94. wasn't that "I've Seen All Good People" by Yes? or did i hear wrong?

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  95. What a time for Cassell to NOT take a shot. "I'ma look for my shot all game, but when .5's on the shot clock and we're up six... TO THA CORNER!"

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  96. @ Zak, that's the comment of the night.

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  97. I feel like this announcing team has no heart tonight, especially for the situation. I'm barely feeling any excitement watching this, and I was excited for Spurs/Lakers. And I have no real favoritism here (/half-hearted Knick fan). Breen doesn't do much for me, especially how he played damage control when Pierce got hurt. I actually like Van Gundy, just... not feeling it tonight. Just kinda... going through the motions. The Game 1 motions.

    Maybe I'm wrong, and just missing something.

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  98. To Garnett, Cassell, and Rondo.


    Stop shooting.....



    Oh yeah, this game is done.

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  99. Kobe's got to start making shots...

    /ESPN's featured comment of the day

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  100. Legler called it in the preview show - would Kobe involve his teammates under 5 minutes, or would he go it alone. Three absolute bricks under great duress instead of passing it out for a great look later - Lakers go down 1-0.

    Good job, Legler.

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  101. The paint has not been the Lakers' friend tonight. Every time the ball enters the key, they're turning it over, misdribbling... 4th quarter unkind

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  102. "GARNETT ON THE FOLLOW!" - Breen

    See, now I feel it. Too bad the game's pretty much over.

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  103. The officiating in the last few minutes has been awful after a good game from those guys.

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  104. That is not a good picture of Erin Andrews. It makes her look like more of a butterface than usual.

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  105. I know this is he dream series but...who the fuck cares about these teams. If this is the best the nba has to offer then this is really now better than Spurs - Pistons. Is it me?

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  106. Everyone knows Phil Jackson is a basketball voodoo priest, with tactics like blacking out the lights briefly in the conference final to throw off the Spurs. This game was just another in a long line of such tactics. Intentionally throwing the game to instill false hope in the Celtics.

    Gotta give it to Doc Rivers though, for taking a page from the Phil Jackson playbook. Faking a sprained knee and timing the return to the court for that surge in momentum. Priceless!

    Curse you Phil Jackson. Curse you and your best-time-out-taking knowledge.

    And go ease on Magic. The man CURED AIDS!

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  107. Anonymous 12:04 is Jemele Hill?

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  108. Vanilla Ice and Van Pelt had Kimmel on their show today, and you could almost hear Tirico's sphincter tightening as SVP and Kimmel started going off the reservation a little. I just wish he'd grow a set of balls and stop acting like Father Flanagan.

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  109. the huge trophy logo at midcourt looks kind of like picasso's take on homer simpson's profile.

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