Dude... that chimachumga I had last night is making me so gassy.

If you lean just right you cant even feel it when he gives you the needle.Well except for this round scar on my ass.

Barry: So this was my position when I let go a whopper of a fart.

I was in such a rage I grabbed the bat and swung at him like this!!

Red Sox slugger David Ortiz looks on as Giants left fielder Barry Bonds demonstrates his pitcheing mechanics. Word is that Bonds plans on eclipsing Babe Ruth's pitching records after acheiving the home run crown.

I've taken so many steriods that I'm all muscle. And those muscles are so tough that the dude who injects me sometimes has to use two hands and reach back like a pitcher to get the needle through. It hurts, but it's worth it dude.

balco barry: boy I'm scared of needles...oh well, that's the price a TRUE champion has to pay. right?
papi: *rolls eyes* *shakes head in disgust* yeah barry, true champion...

p.s. thanks for the link
sonsofsammalone

Barry: Papi, How do you like my impersonation of Curt Schilling giving up a home run to the Rockies??

Barry: ...so Uncle Rico starts throwing the football, and he's doing it all retarded like this. It's really funny. I always wondered why he was named Uncle Rico cuz he ain't Mexican. Hey, you probably got a Uncle Rico, don't you, Big Papi?

Ortiz: Que?

My favorite syringe? Swear to god, it's big as a pogo stick. Gotta climb on the thing and jump on it a couple of times to get all the juice out.

How can we talk at a moment like this when AA just got eliminated from the hot blogger tournament?

...and it was this exact moment in my throwing motion when I realized that Sid fuckin' Bream was going to beat the throw.

...and then the guy sits down like this on a statue made of fuscilli pasta. "Million to one shot, Doc. Million to one."

"I know, I know. I fucking taught Ray Lewis that dance!"

Barry Bonds: Marching to the beat of his own drug....I mean drum!

pile driver!!!

See, I was stripping for Pac and I was bouncin on the pole like this with my big tits and he fuckin asked me for a chew, do you believe that shit?

"Yes, Papi, you're right, I HAVE been working on my impression of Hard Hittin' Mark Whiten."

"And then I smacked the bitch with a wiffle ball bat..."

I should have been in Rush hour Three! See? Ke-yaaaa!

no the only real downside has been the enlarged head,bigger feet and this scar on my ass where the needle goes...but the chicks dig the long ball Papi.

Barry: Sure, the fans love you a lot more...

But how long can you stand on one foot? Huh?