Showing posts with label John Madden. Show all posts
Showing posts with label John Madden. Show all posts

Cris Collinsworth Wins Annual Pat Summerall Award

Thursday, February 04, 2010


There are so many broadcasting awards out there, that it's hard to figure out which ones are the most respected in the business. Obviously winning an Emmy is at the top of the list, but the individual sports broadcasting awards go as follows: Curt Gowdy- Basketball, Ford C. Frick- Baseball and Pat Summerall- Football.

Doug Collins won the Gowdy last year, Jon Miller was given the Frick last week and now Cris Collinsworth has been awarded the Summerall for contributions to the NFL....

Former Florida Gator Great and current NFL sportscaster Cris Collinsworth will be honored with the prestigious Pat Summerall Award on Thursday, Feb. 4, at the annual Legends for Charity Dinner. Each year, the award honors an individual who has made a significant contribution to the sports field. Past recipients include James Brown, Greg Gumbel, Jim Nantz and Chris Berman. The event will take place at the NFL Headquarters Hotel at the Westin Beach Resort in Fort Lauderdale, Fla., and benefits St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital.

During his time at UF from 1977-80, Collinsworth was a three-time All-SEC and two-time All-American performer at wide receiver. As a Gator, he caught 120 passes for 1,937 yards and 14 touchdowns, ran for two other touchdowns and returned a kickoff for another score. He was inducted into the Verizon Academic All-America Hall of Fame in 2001.

Collinsworth played eight seasons with the Cincinnati Bengals and the 1981 Rookie of the Year was also selected to play in three Pro Bowls. Following his NFL career, he became a sportscaster and has since won nine Emmy’s for his work as a sports personality and football analyst. In 2008, Collinsworth covered the Olympic Games for NBC and currently joins Al Michaels as the host of NBC’s Sunday Night Football.
A well-deserved honor to be sure. Usually when you try to replace a legend like John Madden, you either fail completely or it takes a few years to get the chemistry down. Collinsworth made the transition seamlessly and kept NBC rolling throughout the season. Bravo Sir!

Former Gator Cris Collinsworth To Be Recognized (WCTV)

Watching Football With John Madden Is Epic

Tuesday, October 06, 2009

I've always wanted to watch a game with John Madden (it would be my Make-A-Wish wish for sure), but I never envisioned it like this. Madden has developed a massive Football viewing experience, and has taken to watching every game on Sunday with dads of NFL QBs....

 


"Roast Beef Central" is perhaps the best name for an eatery that I've ever heard. In fact, John Madden should come out with a Subway/Pot Belly type deli called "RBC". I would be the first in line.

(Video via Real Clear Sports)

John Madden To Be A Special Advisor To Roger Goodell

Thursday, September 10, 2009

You knew John Madden wouldn't be able to stay away from the game for long, but this is a rather quick move. Madden is now Roger Goodell's "special advisor", and will aide the Commish on things like player safety, and coaching development. Via ESPN....

John Madden is back in the NFL as an unpaid "special advisor" to commissioner Roger Goodell.

The league announced Thursday that Madden, who retired as a broadcaster earlier this year, would advise Goodell on "matters pertaining to the game, including competitive issues, coaching and personnel development, technological innovations, player safety, and the Pro Football Hall of Fame."

"When I retired from broadcasting, I didn't retire from my passion and interest in the game," Madden said in a statement. "This position enables me to continue that."

Madden will chair the Coaches Subcommittee to the Competition Committee, which reports in prior to the league's annual meetings. He will also participate in meetings of the General Managers Advisory Committee and talk weekly with Goodell or someone else on Goodell's staff.

"It was an offer we couldn't refuse," Goodell said in a statement.
The guy is really a Football genius, so as Goodell said, it was a no-brainer. Now we just wait until he officially changes the term Touchdowns, to Favredowns.

Madden joins NFL in advisory job (ESPN)

Posted by Awful Announcing at 12:38 PM 1 Comments

John Madden Is Just Fine With Retirement, Thank You

Thursday, August 20, 2009


If I had spent 30+ years, doing the exact same thing each Summer, I don't know what I would do with myself if I didn't have to do it anymore. Apparently John Madden is going through that feeling now, but it doesn't seem to be bothering him. In an interview with the LA Times, he tells the paper that he's enjoying himself and isn't exactly leaving Football entirely....

Q: How’s retirement treating you?
Madden: It’s going well for me. But you know, it really hasn’t started yet. I retired from broadcasting football. So far, it’s been the off-season for me. The Hall of Fame game is the first game I would have done. So I really haven’t retired from anything until football season starts.

Q: Will you spending a lot more time on the virtual gridiron now?
Madden: That’s one thing I’m really looking forward to. Each week I’m going to watch all the games. I have this thing being built right now where I have nine 63-inch monitors. And I’m going to be able to put every game on television. I can watch them all at the same time.

Then I’m going to see more. When I was broadcasting, I would just zero in on the game I was doing. Doing this, I’m going to see more. I’m going to see all the trends. I’m going to see what every team does. Those trends and the things that they’re doing in the games on Sundays, those are the things we will put in the game.
While the above statement was in reference to his work on the 2011 edition of the Madden video game, there are rumors that you'll be hearing a lot of Madden on the radio. There are already talks to get him on Sirius, and you can expect a lot of guest appearance on shows throughout the country, as the season progresses.

John Madden talks about the virtual gridiron, the Madden Curse and life outside of the broadcasting booth (LA Times)

Posted by Awful Announcing at 2:07 PM 4 Comments

Video: NBC's Tribute To Madden

Sunday, August 09, 2009


For most of the Hall of Fame Game, I really wasn't missing John Madden. I thought Collinsworth worked great with Madden, and didn't really think about Madden until they aired the tribute piece at halftime. Throw some "booms" together with a random telestrator squiggle, and you've got a winner!

According To Collinsworth, Madden Asked Him To Be His Replacement

Wednesday, April 29, 2009


I don't know if there's a higher honor in the Sports World, but during his first interview since taking over for John Madden, Cris Collinsworth admitted that the legend actually asked him to be his successor. Via the Cincy Inquirer....

But Collinsworth wanted to talk about the man with 15 Emmys: Madden.
“John asked me to replace him. That’s as high of a tribute as you can get in this business,” Collinsworth says.

The two finally spoke Monday for the first time since Madden, 73, retired.
“It’s something that I’ll treasure for a lifetime. He was so gracious and wonderful … It was about as special a moment as I’ve ever had in my professional career,” says Collinsworth, who joined WLW-AM and cable’s “Inside the NFL” after leaving football. “I want to make him proud.”

NBC had planned for Collinsworth to succeed Madden for some time. Collinsworth’s contract named him successor for either Madden or announcer Al Michaels, he says. He just didn’t expect it to happen this soon.
It's a shame that Madden is retiring now, because he's so much fun to watch on Sunday nights, but if anyone can fill in right away it's Collinsworth. Now we just have to wait to see and see who will replace him on the NFL Network.

Collinsworth praises Madden (Cincinnati Inquirer)

Your Nine Madden 2010 Cover Finalists Are?

Wednesday, April 22, 2009


Madden Day is still one of my favorite times of the year, even though I'm thirty years-old (shh...don't tell anyone). The suspense leading up to it is pretty fun as well, and this year EA has decided to release the nine finalists competing for the right to get injured next season....er, get the cover. Here's who they're deciding between. From SBD via EA Sports....

EA Sports has announced the nine finalists to appear on the cover of the "Madden NFL 10" videogame, with the cover athlete to be announced Friday. The finalists are Steelers S Troy Polamalu, Colts QB Peyton Manning, Cardinals WR Larry Fitzgerald, Chiefs QB Matt Cassel, Cowboys LB DeMarcus Ware, Steelers QB Ben Roethlisberger, Giants RB Brandon Jacobs, Vikings RB Adrian Peterson and Ravens S Ed Reed
Matt Cassell?!?! Seriously??? Ummm....okay....sure. Other than that, the rest of the candidates seem worthy enough. It would be cool to see someone like Polamalu or Reed get it, because I think the last defensive player on the cover was Ray Lewis. The cover athlete for Madden '10 will be announced on Friday.

EA Narrows Possible Cover Athletes To Nine (Sports Business Daily - $)

Posted by Awful Announcing at 4:25 PM 14 Comments

John Madden Calls It Quits

Thursday, April 16, 2009


You knew the time was coming, but this news still comes as a shock. John Madden has told NBC that he's hanging it up for good, and has officially retired. Via the Associated Press....

John Madden, the burly former coach who has been one of pro football's most popular broadcast analysts for three decades, is calling it quits.

Madden worked for the past three seasons on NBC's Sunday night NFL game. His last telecast was the Super Bowl between Arizona and Pittsburgh.

"It's time," Madden said. "I'm 73 years old. My 50th wedding anniversary is this fall. I have two great sons and their families and their five grandchildren are at an age now when they know when I'm home and, more importantly, when I'm not."

Madden said he still loves all aspects of the game and his job, and that's why it took him a couple of months to make the decision.
Madden's love for the Sport he covers, or covered rather, is unparalleled. It took me awhile to appreciated what he brought to games, but over the last few years his crazy telestrations and inane ramblings, grew on me. Everyone deserves to go out on top, and Madden is certainly doing so.

Madden And Michaels Make Up For Shaky Pregame Show

Monday, February 02, 2009


I mentioned yesterday afternoon, that the pregame show on NBC was all over the place, and after I wrote that, I was a bit worried that the game would continue along the same lines. Thankfully it didn't, and not only was the game itself a great one, I think it was one of the best broadcasts I've ever seen. Perhaps even the best.

The production elements were spot on, the replays were stellar and there wasn't much overkill in the network's reporting. As far as the announcing, there's a reason why people still respect and want to listen to Madden and Michaels. In recent years, I've commented that Madden had lost a step, and Michaels didn't seem to like the game anymore, but they both had a resurgence this past season. To end it on a high note in the Super Bowl like this, just adds to their legacy as broadcasters.

I enjoyed everything about the game and even thought that the normally boring halftime show was rather exciting as well. I don't even like Bruce Springsteen that much either. As far as negatives go, the only things I would point out were the terrible commercials (which isn't NBC's fault) and the number of sideline reports. Other than that I think I'll be giving out one of my first "A" grades in the site's history.

There's just something about NBC's broadcasts each Sunday that are just light years better than any other network. Al and John don't try to make themselves bigger than the moment and let the games speak for themselves. FOX and CBS' telecasts come off as boring at times, and it seems as if the announcers are talking down to you, but not with the "Peacock".

There were 11 years between Super Bowls on NBC, and the NFL needs to make sure that never happens again. Onto the grades....

GRADES:

Matt Lauer- C+ (Good questions with Obama, but he didn't seem to care when he was on-air)
Al Roker- F- (The Super Suite was a horrible idea and Roker was just not good in the role)
Bob Costas- B+ (Was at his best/non-annoying self yesterday)
Cris Collinsworth- B+ (Still the best analyst in the Sport)
Dan Patrick- B- (Entertaining and informative)
Keith Olbermann- C (Just too smarmy for my taste)
Jerome Bettis- C+ (Better than he normally is, but the Steeler homerism showed)
Tiki Barber- C (Pointless)
Peter King- D+ (Doubly pointless)
Matt Millen- B- (Good analyst again and he works well with Collinsworth and Costas)
Tony Dungy- C (Loved the connection to Tomlin, but also pointless)
Mike Holmgren- C- (Really pointless)
Rodney Harrison- D+ (Just wasn't ready for the big time. The Tyree stuff could have been interesting, but he still seems bitter about the play)
Alex Flanagan- B- (Should be NBC's full-time sideline reporter)
Andrea Kremer- C+ (I'm biased here, because I've never been a fan, but she wasn't bad)
John Madden- B+ (Hopefully he's got another year in him)
Al Michaels- A- (Best Football play-by-play man period)

Pregame Show- D
Halftime Show- B+
Game Coverage- A

Your Super Bowl Sunday Highlights And Quotes


Sorry it took so long to get this up today (Internet was down this morning), but I wanted to post a vid and quotes in case you wanted to relive one heck of a Super Bowl. I wouldn't say it was the best one ever, but that was certainly one of the best fourth quarters. You couldn't ask for much more in a game. Here is your Super Sunday in quotes, and I'll add the video as soon as it finishes loading....

“How many pounds of chips will be consumed on Super Bowl Sunday?”- Chris Berman
“By you?”- Mike Ditka
“Not by me! Nutrisystem. I don’t do that.”- Chris Berman
“I always like to feel the skin on skin.”- Ron Jaworski
“I’m not an expert on quarterbacks, but I’m an expert on winning.”- Mike Ditka

“He’s the leader of that Football team, that’s all that matters to me. Now I don’t know, how pretty guys throw it. Well, Steve (Young) had a nice arm I mean, but you know….so what?”- Mike Ditka

“That’s why we brought you to the show, Senator (McCain). We needed analysis. These guys just aren’t providing it.”- Chris Berman

“Banged up receiving core, with Ward out of the Football game.”- Keyshawn Johnson

“Ahoy mateys!”- Bob Costas broadcasting from the Bucs’ Pirate Ship

“Zane Wilson, from The Office…..”- Al Rocker

“Was he in, or was he in San Antonio?”- Keith Olbermann on Santonio Holmes’ controversial catch against Baltimore

“Here’s your Keith play, your key play.”- Dan Patrick
“Here’s your Dan play.”- Keith Olbermann

“Is Sarah Palin excited about the Super Bowl? You betcha.”- Bob Costas

“It’s really sticky, but it’s a good sticky.”- Mike Holmgren on the Gatorade bath
“Swagger is not an institute of higher learning. He’s just telling you he has swaaaaaager.”- Al Michaels

“If we were choosing to do something, I would choose Hines Ward first.”- John Madden

"He's so quick he got ball." - John Madden
"If you know Dick LeBeau, he's 71 going on 48." - John Madden
"And you know his mom. She's 95. That's some good genes." - Al Michaels

“That’s one of the ways he flashed.”- John Madden

“If you read all of those names it would be over before you finished.”- John Madden on Michaels reading off the halftime analysts’ names

“James Harrison runs like James Brown.”- John Madden

"We're still buzzin' about Bruce Springsteen at halftime, but I'll tell you if there was one guy we weren't thinking was 'Born To Run' it was James Harrison."- Bob Costas

"Good thing it's not a Somalian ship."- Al Michaels on the TB pirate ship

"He has a 150 to 200 plays on that wristband so maybe they needed some help with the Dewey decimal system to find it."- Al Michaels
"Just imagine what the print looks like on that."- John Madden
"You gotta have Ted Williams' eyesight."- Al Michaels

"The emotions of this game have been over the moon." - Al Michaels

“That was a real super, Super Bowl.” – John Madden

"We tried to put the pontoons on the madden cruiser but couldn't fit them on there, so I guess Collinsworth is coming over there with me."- Al Michaels on the Pro Bowl

Comcast Affiliate Airs 30 Seconds Of Porn During 4th Quarter

Not only did Arizona Fans have to deal with a heartbreaking loss, some of those in Arizona got a dash of porn mixed into their viewing of the fourth quarter. Immediately following Larry Fitzgerald's second TD, NBC affiliate KVOA, magically switched over to pay-per-view porn. Seriously....

Comcast continued this morning to investigate how pornography interrupted it’s feed during the final quarter of the Super Bowl on Sunday.

It is unclear how many viewers were affected by the clip, which lasted about 30 seconds, and featured full male nudity, said Kelle Maslyn, a Comcast spokeswoman.

“We are mortified by last evening’s Super Bowl interruption, and deeply apologize to our customers for the inappropriate programming,” Maslyn said in a statement. “We are aggressively investigating the situation including the possibility of foul play.”
Comcast is working on a plan to compensate customers, but nothing has been set in stone, Maslyn said.

The pornography clip was from Club Jenna, an adult cable television channel.
Ah Club Jenna, I know it wel.....waaaaaait a minute! Almost over-shared there. Anyway, I know all of you are deviants, so I decided to pull the clip up for you. However, I took out the nudity part because I don't really want that on the site and it's only a guy shaking his junk around. It's still extremely NSFW though, so be warned....



Unbelievable. The fact that Madden said, "they went to the perfect guy in the perfect situation," immediately following the clip, is so fitting! However, if you were sitting there with young kids, you might be a little pissed off today. Hopefully the remote was close enough that they could shut the power off.

Comcast investigating Super Bowl Porn feed (AZ Starnet)
Porn Invades The Super Bowl (Fleshbot)

Collinsworth In Line For Madden's Spot On Sunday Night Football

Wednesday, January 28, 2009


I guess this shouldn't come as shock to anyone, but NBC Chairman Dick Ebersol told USA Today that if Madden should want to retire, they have a replacement already lined up. That person of course is Cris Collinsworth.

Not that Madden has ever suggested he wants to retire. He noted Tuesday that "it doesn't get any better" than working a Super Bowl and working another one "sounds pretty good." And NBC's Ebersol has repeated said that Madden will get that chance, saying he plans on keeping Madden at least through the remaining three seasons on NBC's NFL TV deal. Tuesday, Ebersol even volunteered he'd be "devastated" if Madden decided to retire. But if Madden did step aside, said Ebersol, Collinsworth would be "the first guy" in line. Which makes sense, given that Ebersol hired Collinsworth to be NBC's game analyst -- until Madden, who'd been at ABC, became available. Ebersol, still wanting Collinsworth on games, had him practice play-by-play calls in hopes he could be teamed with Madden -- until Al Michaels became available. Collinsworth, Tuesday, after being asked if he saw any chance in which he'd replace Madden in NBC's current deal: "I hope not."
I'm certainly a Collinsworth fan, but I don't know how I would feel about the guy actually doing play-by-play for a network. There are certainly worse options out there, but I think the current plan of succession is perfect for NBC. The only problem is that Michaels has already said he would retire when Madden does, so I'm not sure if that ultimately does mean a move to PbP for Collinsworth.

Whither John Madden (Open Mike)

Playing Madden Makes You Smarter

Wednesday, January 21, 2009


Well not smarter in the traditional sense, but in the Football sense. That's what a new survey done by EA Sports in conjunction with the Warsaw Sports Marketing Center at the University of Oregon. Via Darren Rovell at CNBC....

The survey revealed that those who played "Madden" were 60 percent more knowledgeable about the game than those who just classified themselves as non-gaming fans of the league.

"This proves that our game is doing a tremendous service to the real sports," Peter Moore, president of EA Sports, told me. "Playing the game creates a better educated and more involved fan. And that means that all the people say gamers are wasting time while playing games on the couch are wrong. We've suspected it for years, but this proves that playing "Madden" helps create a deeper knowledge of the game that just watching on television."

Moore said he recently saw that first hand when he asked how his son knew how to recognize something on the football field. He told his dad that he had seen the play in "Madden."

The survey found that those who played Madden were 79 percent better in their general knowlege [sic] of the game, 54 percent better when being quizzed about game situations and 28 percent better on the rules of the game.
The game is so detailed nowadays that this isn't really a surprise. In fact, I would credit my own knowledge of the game to the game as well. Figuring out offenses is pretty simple, but everything on the defensive side of the ball I learned from Maddens 2003 to present. Now I don't know what "Madden Drinking Games" do to said knowledge, but I'm sure that they don't help. Drinking seven for a TD, and a full beer for a kickoff return, can't help.

Playing Video Games Good For You? (CNBC: Sports Biz)

Posted by Awful Announcing at 1:33 PM 3 Comments

AFC Wild Card Live-Blog: Colts @ Chargers, 2nd Half

Saturday, January 03, 2009


Colts start at the 26. Manning hits Reggie Wayne for 31, airing it out on the right side to start. All the way up to the Chargers' 43. The next pass goes to Addai for nine yards, and Addai gets stopped for a loss on a 3rd and not much. 4th and 1....going for it...and Peyton throws incomplete. Big, big stop.

Sponge on the break. I haven't heard "Wax Ecstatic" in years, and we get that over Manning Face.

Wow. That was an Andy Reid Moment. - Mal

"My hair says ENERGY!"

Sproles gets stuffed, but takes it for a few yards on the next pass from Rivers. 3rd down rifle to Chambers for the first down, despite the pass interference on the Colts. Sproles rushes for some more, 3rd and 2 is incomplete for Chambers. Fair catch of the punt at the Indy 9.

Manning starts out with a short slant to Marvin Harrison. Addai gets the first down at the 23. He goes deep for Wayne, but Cromartie has him covered. 2nd down after an encroachment, incomplete.

Manning catches the Chargers' defense not even set -- hikes the ball, and hits Reggie Wayne right in stride. TOUCHDOWN, COLTS! 17-14 after the kick. "You Dropped A Bomb On Me," indeed. Just made the entire 11 look silly.

Chargers start on the 20 after Sproles takes a knee on the kick. Six-yard pass to the fullback, Jacob Hester.

Did anyone else notice Norv is wearing glasses now? Like it makes him look any smarter. Acrobatic catch by Chambers on a classic floater back foot throw by Rivers.

"He can't run a lick, but he can move enough just to keep the play alive." - John

At about midfield, and Sproles gets back to the line of scrimmage. The next carry gets him past the first down marker and at the 40. Michael Bennett is in for Sproles, and he barrels through for another first down within the 30. 2nd and 10. Rivers rifles it to Leagdu Naane at the 10. First and goal, nowhere to go for Darren. Sproles gets the next pass, tries to get into the end zone, and the ball is loose in the back of the end zone -- TOUCHBACK, fumble recovered by the Colts!

This Geico ad is now officially getting on my fucking nerves. Cromartie drops a sure pick. He wants that one back right now bad. 3rd down pass is also nearly picked, too. Sproles brings the punt return out to the 45, with a break of Steppenwolf. Sproles gets 9 yards on the carry, going to the Indy 47.

"I love it when they say, 'running backs who try to get small.' He doesn't have to try." - Al on Sproles. Freeney gets his second sack of the night. (MORE, MORE, MORE!!!!) Rivers, on 3rd and 13, rushes 12 yards of those 13 on his own. 4th and 1....Rivers sneaks....and he's got the 1st at the 33 after they measure it.

Rivers aims deep for Chambers in the end zone.....and it's picked off by Antoine Bethea, who runs it out, but there's a chop block by an Indy defender. Peyton will have the ball again.

Got to love Phillip Rivers going Favre with that pass. - 49er16

But he's having a lot of fun out there! Colts start at the 20, swing out to Clark, but there's a tripping call for 10 yards, and that'll be moved back. Goes back to Clark for four yards. Manning slings it to Wayne at the 31 for a first down. Addai grabs four yards. Another first down to Dallas Clark.

Norv looks like my high school principal with the glasses.

Rhodes shoves his way in with his shoulder for a first down in Chargers' territory on 3rd and 2. Cason nearly comes up with the pick on 1st and 10, but it hit the ground first. Manning rolls out, throws it away, and there's a holding penalty. 2nd and 20 gets nothing on the Addai carry. Chargers' D holds as Manning throws incomplete, and the penalty for holding is declined.

Bolts start at the 27 after the punt goes out of bounds. Sproles gets 17 after the catch on the pass out from Rivers. Sproles up to the 49 on the next carry. Another Rex Grossman-style pass from Rivers, and he's lucky that didn't get picked like the last one. Pass out to Bennett, and it's marked just slightly short of the first down....what, really. That's a first down, apparently.

Rivers aims downfield for Naane, and he underthrows him just slightly with double coverage. And down goes Rivers on 3rd down, Robert Mathis gets his second of the day.

That was ingenious Golden Globes advertising, NBC. I'd watch Salma Hayek's Golden Globes in HD.

Scifres punts it again in great field position. Colts start at their own 2, and we get "The Final Countdown."

Addai rushes for six to get out of the end zone. Next carry isn't much. 3rd and 2. Rush on....and DOWN GOES PEYTON AT THE ONE YARD LINE!

Sproles takes a very good punt back to the Colts' 36. Rivers hits Gates for a first down. Another first down to Gates at the 21. Rivers rolls out, can't find anyone, throws it away. Sproles rushes, gets it inside the 10, but short of the first. Colts' time out. Kaeding's on the field. Field goal is up and good, 17-all.

Colts start at the 19 after the kickoff. Short pass to Addai, and they're playing for OT, it looks like. Jyles Tucker is down. Indy gets an extra time out thanks to the injury, because SD is out of them. Manning throws out to Addai again, and the Colts burn another TO. Incomplete, and a kneel, we go to OT. Bolts win the toss.

Sproles brings the kick out to the 25. Raheem Brock is there to stuff him on the first down carry. Rivers throws it away after rolling out on 2nd down. Short out to Sproles -- and he gets past the first down marker on 3rd and 11. Bennett comes in for six yards and the rush. Sproles gets nailed in the backfield, and there's a flag for holding on Indy, for an automatic first down.

Sproles to midfield with 2 yards. Rivers to Gates, who drags tacklers with him for the first down. He loses the ball, but falls right on it. Mathis bull-rushes Rivers and he throws it at the feet of Hester to avoid grounding. 3rd and 8...Chambers on the outside against Jennings, and they call defensive holding. Another automatic first down. And another first down on a Sproles carry, they've called a face mask!

Mighty Mite gets nailed at the 24, loses a couple of yards. Sproles takes the carry, goes outside....AND RUNS ALL THE WAY IN FOR THE TOUCHDOWN! CHARGERS WIN, 23-17! Sproles had more than 300 yards on the day, but none more important than those last 24.

Thanks for joining me tonight. See y'all tomorrow!

AFC Wild Card Live-Blog: Colts @ Chargers, 1st Half

Well, I was blatantly wrong in the early game. Let's see if I'm any better this time around.

LDT on the bike: pedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedalpedal

Darren Sproles takes it out to the 22. LDT can make a cut, I guess. 13 yard gain to start. Two more for LDT, and a throw to Gates for six. 3rd and 2. Robert Mathis then nails Philip Rivers for the first sack, and it's three and out. Punt fair caught at the 9 yard line.

Manning to Harrison right off the bat for eight. Addai gets stuffed on his first carry. Another third down conversion for the Colts, as Manning hits the receiver. He throws it away on first down after Eric Weddle rushes him. Tony Ugoh gets flagged for five. Manning aims deep for Harrison, but it's getting called for PI on Quentin Jammer. First down. Addai gets two in SD territory.

You never want to hear the ref crew being the one that calls the most flags. EVER.

Manning misses Wayne, as the wideout looks the wrong way on the pass after getting Antonio Cromartie looking foolish. Reggie Wayne drops the third down pass, and the Colts will punt. Hunter Smith's kick goes into the end zone.

3rd and 10 after an incomplete pass and Darren Sproles getting nothing. Rivers' 3rd down pass to Gates winds up short of the first down. Scifres punts it 58 yards, with barely a return. Indy starts inside the 20 again.

LT (singing in his head): I love to ride my bicycle. I love to ride my bike. Biiii-cycle. Biiii-cycle. - Mal

Ha. Manning to Dallas Clark for three on a 1st and 15 after a false start. He hits Anthony Gonzalez for six at the 24.

"They also thought he knew the daily double at Del Mar." - Al, as Manning hits Wayne on the screen pass to the 33. Manning to Clark again for another first down. Peyton then goes back to Gonzalez for 36, as he weaves and bobs after the catch. "Looked like a video game," according to Al. Surprised he didn't crack a Madden joke. Gonzalez goes airborne and brings it down at the 3 yard line in double coverage.

Addai can't burrow in on first and goal. Addai on the inside handoff, and it's a TOUCHDOWN, COLTS. Viniateri's kick is good, 7-0, Indy.

Sproles got wailed on at the 25. Rivers to Gates for 6, followed by a five yarder for ineligible downfield. Rivers is hit by Dwight Freeney as he throws to Sproles. 3rd and 9, Sproles gets 13 after the inside handoff and sneaks between the tackles.

"Final minute of the opening stanza." - Al. THIS IS NOT POETRY, THIS IS FOOTBALL.

Sproles gets a couple, but Rivers is incomplete on 3rd and 3. Fits and starts for the Bolts right now, and no passes to either Chris Chambers or Vincent Jackson. Indy gets backed up to its own 3 on the punt. End of the first.

Manning Family shot to start the second. (crosses off list). Short runs and a pass is stopped short of the first down by Antoine Cason. Colts punt out of their own end zone...and it'll get even tougher as Indy gets a delay of game call. Sproles takes the punt back to the 43 yard line of the Colts.

Did Dungy have a Norv face? - James Craven

No. Dungy's facial expression never changes. He's Art Shell, but, y'know, like, successful. (Well, Art Shell 1.0 did fine.)

Everytime they show the charger girls I wonder if the tires on my car are over-inflated. - Mal

Rivers hits Gates again for eight yeards after a rollout. LT gets three to the 33 yard line and a chain movement. Gates again, getting major yards after catch and nailing a first and goal at the 3 yard line. LT busts through an easy hole, TOUCHDOWN, CHARGERS. Nate Kaeding's kick is good, 7-7.

There are no Wendy's within 20 minutes of me. I am tired of seeing their ads now, with that in mind. If you need a diversion, here are the Charger Girls for your perusal.

s2n - "LT busts through an easy hole"???? I didn't know Lindsay Lohan was at the game. - Mal

1,000 cocktails, sir. Colts start at their own 33, and Gonzalez lays out for a very nice catch for 21 yards on first down. Addai, nothing doing on 1st down, but gets nine yards on a pass from Peyton on the next play. End around to Clark for the first down -- AWESOME PLAY CALL. You never run that to the TE, ever. Unless when your DE is Clark; maybe Jason Witten could do that. Gates could do that too. Manning throws it away, sensing a defender coming.

"When you brush away the hair, you know it's not the way it's supposed to be." - John, as if you can get anything nice with helmet hair. 3rd and 10 pass to Clark is short by five yards, Viniateri comes on for a 40+ yard FG try. Up and good, 10-7, Colts.

"[Manning] will get a Vitalis ad out of this." - Al on Peyton Samson's hairdo (via James Craven)

Darren Sproles gets up-ended on the return after bringing it out to the 32. Dwight Freeney violates Rivers' back side for a sack on 2nd down. (MORE, MORE, MORE, COLTS. Hit him in his punk face.) Rivers throws his first non-Gates completion to Sproles, but it's 4th and 11.

MIKE SCIFRES JUST BOOTED ONE 67. Holy shit, that's impressive. Colts start on the 7. 3 for Dominic Rhodes. Wayne bobbles one and doesn't come down with it until he's out of bounds, but Tony Dungy is challenging. This is not gonna be overturned.

Norv just gave a "whew" face after that call stood. 3rd down and some audiblizing on both sides results in a checkdown play, picked up by linebacker Stephen Cooper. Hunter Smith will punt from his end zone again. The punt bounces back to the Indy 45. Sproles rushes for 11 up to the 34. Rivers throws a rope to the sideline, which Chris Chambers reels in and is called a catch. Looked kind of OB to me.

S2N letting out his Bronco fandom with the Rivers hatred - JG

Naturally. Rivers snaps one over the 10 to Chambers for a first and goal. Handoff to Sproles, has a guy grabbing at his leg, and gets right into the end zone! Kaeding's kick is good, 14-10, Chargers.

Sproles made the "money" gesture with his fingers, too. Kickoff, bringing it back out, and there's a FUMBLE!!!! Chargers recover! Wait --- they ruled him down, but this can be reviewed, and SD called a time out.

Ooh, I thought that was a fumble, guys....I don't know about that. Manning nearly picked off by Eric Weddle. Rush to Addai. Bolts' timeout. Addai picks up the first down. Incomplete for Gonzalez at midfield. Addai ends the half with a rush. 14-10, Chargers.

Sunday Night Football Open Thread

Sunday, December 28, 2008



It's the Stoned Yokel vs. Marmalard in the Whale's Vagina for all the AFC West marbles, and I figure I'm safer and better off listening to this on the radio on the drive back to my little university town from L.A. rather than watch Al and John. "But you're a Broncos fan, aren't you, S2N?", you might ask, and that would be true. However, after watching this team give up two straight losses and utterly fail on defense, I remember how they lost out on a Wild Card spot two years ago thanks to losing in San Francisco in Week 17, and the last thing I think I want to do is see another similar collapse on TV after Mike Shanahan guaranteed a playoff spot before the season started.

That being said, have at it. I think the only thing I will miss is Rivers acting like a jerk by trash talking with a possible 8-8 record heading into the playoffs.

SNF Live-Blog: Panthers @ Giants, 2nd Half

Sunday, December 21, 2008

I didn't want to re-use a photo of Abby Manning, but I couldn't find one without her dopey husband in it.

Mark Jones takes the kickoff up to the 33 yard line, as Andrea tells us about Justin Tuck suffering from the flu. DeAngelo Williams gets five yards on first down, then gets six more to move the chains, as he's flipped over. Jonathan Stewart comes back in and crosses midfield by gaining six or seven yards. Good coverage on 2nd down, as Delhomme aims for a check down, but it's incomplete. Nearly throws a pick on 3rd down as the Giants blitz, and Baker will be on to punt. R.W. McQuarters fair catches the ball at about the 10.

Jacobs gets 3 on first down. He's the recipient of the next short pass, and he has to reach down to grab it. Manning out of the shotgun, incomplete to Domenik Hixon over his back shoulder. 4th down. Feagles shanks it, and Carolina will start at the Giants' 48. Williams gets a yard after they fake the end-around to Steve Smith. Stewart gets up to the 43. 3rd down throw to Muhammad over the middle is broken up by Corey Webster. Baker to punt. McQuarters downs it at the Giant 16.

Eli goes to Kevin Boss to start, who gets up to the 20. 2nd down gets a yard, Eli gets a delay of game on 3rd and 5, turning it into 3rd and 10. Manning finds Boss, who gets more than that 10 and a first down. Next pass goes to Hixon for another 10 yards up to the 41. Jacobs gets three more on the next carry. Ward busts it to the outside once again after cutting through the line, 22 yard gain to the Carolina 33. Manning hits Amani Toomer for his first catch of the day at the 21. Manning hits the fullback Hedgecock, who gets inside the 10 yard line for a first and goal.

Jacobs gets the carry and heads to the 2 yard line, but gets hit hard behind the line of scrimmage on the next carry.

"Sinuses are cleared." - Al
"A lot of things of cleared." - John, after Chris Harris' hit on Jacobs

Manning drops back and hits Kevin Boss coming across the end zone for the touchdown. They kick the point, and it's 21-20, Panthers.

I hate this Diet Pepsi Max ad now, although it's nice to know that Chris Kattan is getting some form of employment. Mark Jones returns the kick to the 36. Delhomme looks deep for Steve Smith, but his pass is incomplete. Williams gets six yards on the carry. Delhomme spots Muhsin Muhammad at midfield and hits him to move the chains on the last play of the third quarter.

Antonio Pierce gets some nice penetration on the running play and brings Williams down for a 1-yard loss. Williams gets that yard back and one more; 3rd and 9. Delhomme hits Dwayne Jarrett, who gets airborne to bring the ball down at the 31 of New York. Williams gets the carry, gets to the outside -- and breaks it all the way for 30 yards for the score! Add the XP, it's 28-20, Carolina. Fourth TD of the day for DeAngelo Williams!

Bradshaw brings the ball out to the 23 this time. Manning's brought down by Tyler Brayton for a 9-yard sack on first down. Jacobs gets back all the way out to the 30, catching the Panthers in nickel coverage. Ward gets to the outside again and is sprung free by a block all the way to the Carolina 33 for a 37 yard carry. Jacobs up to the 31. Eli doesn't like the defense and calls time. Jacobs' hands of stone drop the pass from Manning on 2nd down and 7. On 3rd down, Manning gets shellacked by Julius Peppers from his blind side. You could hear that from miles away.

It knocks the G-men out of field goal range, so Feagles punts, and the Giants bat it out at the one-yard line to pin the Panthers in. Williams gets a yard on the next two carries. He gets up to the 4 yard line on 3rd down. Baker's punt is good; McQuarters runs out of bounds at the Carolina 44.

Hixon gets 13 yards after an initial loss on a penalty. 2nd and 2 after the catch. Derrick Ward gets stopped for a loss of a yard. Manning hits Toomer on the right side, he gets extra yardage by breaking tacklers and is down at the 22. Ward gets two yards on the carry, then grabs three more on the shotgun draw play. 3rd and 5 -- over the middle to Kevin Boss, and he runs to the five before he's brought down. First and goal.

Manning goes for Hixon in the end zone, and it's broken up -- but they call pass interference on Ken Lucas, Carolina's first PI flag all season. Resets the down to first and goal at the 1. Brandon Jacobs rumbles through the line for a touchdown, and the Giants are going for two.

Incredibly good fake to Jacobs out of the shotgun on the conversion, and Manning hits a wide-open Hixon. 28-all! Damn, this is a game we got here.

Another good return by Mark Jones, who is tackled at the Carolina 38. Delhomme to Stewart over the middle, and he crosses midfield to move the chains. Stewart gets a yard on the next play. Two minute warning.

Great break-up of the pass to Steve Smith by Corey Webster, making it 3rd and 9. But Muhammad is there on 3rd down, crossing the marker and being tackled at the 37. Delhomme drops it, but picks it up and hands it off to Williams, who gets 10 yards and a first down -- depending on this flag -- and it's a holding call on Steve Smith. That'll be coming back to the Giants 47.

"That's a good hold. That's a doggone takedown." - John, on Smith's holding penalty.

I believe Steve Smith could make a very good wrestler, even at his tiny size. Williams gets up to the 40.

Glad we got that shot of Justin Tuck being, as Al said, "sick with the flu". - Mal

Donovan McNabb understands Justin Tuck's pain. DeAngelo Williams out of the Wildcat formation, he rushes up to about the 33, getting out of bounds. 3rd and 6, Williams gets two yards, and Kasay is going to try a 50 yard FG.

Kick is up....and WIDE LEFT! We're gonna have us some OT!

Giants get the ball to start, winning the coin toss.

"Looks like Eli Manning said, 'Oh my goodness.'" - John
"Or a reasonable facsimile, when we come back." - Al

Giants' offense starts at the 20 after Bradshaw takes a knee on the kickoff. Ward starts off with a six yard carry, he's over 130 yards rushing on the night. Eli's pass is a bit high for Domenik Hixon. The pass for Toomer is also too high, and the Giants will go three and out.

Feagles punts it to Mark Jones, who's tackled after making it to the 38 yard line of the Panthers. Jonathan Stewart gets six yards on his first OT carry. They go back to Stewart for 2 more yards.

"You how you say key third down? Every third down is a key third down in overtime." - Al

Delhomme's 3rd down pass is tipped and incomplete but Kevin Dockery, and the Panthers will have to punt as well. Baker punts to McQuarters, who muffs it, but is able to fall on it at the 13 yard line. Near disaster right there.

Ward gets a massive hole through the middle and runs right through it all the way to the Carolina 36! Jacobs takes the next carry 3 yards up to the 33. Manning throws behind Hixon on the play. Another shotgun draw to Ward, who is up to 198 rushing yards after taking that play to the 19.

Ward is INSANE, getting to the outside again!

"On a windy night, it's Wind of Earth, Wind, and Fire. 216 yards!" - Al, after Derrick Ward runs another 18 to the outside. First and goal at the 1 -- and BRANDON JACOBS ICES HOMEFIELD WITH THE TOUCHDOWN! 34-28, GIANTS!

301 yards on the ground total for the Giants. Great, great game. Thanks for joining me. I'll be driving to L.A. tomorrow as I'm on vacation this week, so if I get there in time, maybe there might be a Monday Night Football live-blog.

SNF Live-Blog: Panthers @ Giants

Until Steve Smith showed me, I didn't know that Mercedes-Benz made custom golf carts. Fascinating. By the way, considering that there are two wideouts named Steve Smith playing in this game, the Panthers receiver will be Steve Smith and the Giants receiver will be TOSS (The Other Steve Smith), as I established in last week's game.

John Madden's jowls are absolutely frightening in HD.

And you can write in Broncos-Chargers as the final game next Sunday night. The rest of the schedule will be announced at halftime. - James Craven

Really? God help all us viewers. Ahmad Bradshaw takes the kickoff up to the 20 to start the game. Eli Manning fakes the first handoff to Brandon Jacobs, rolls right, and hits Domenik Hixon for what looks like a first down, but it's a yard short. Jacobs gets 3 when he needs one, then picks up 2 more on first down. Jacobs hits the outside and gets four or five more on the next play.

Manning rolls out, avoids a sack, and he throws it 40 yards to Hixon, who comes down with it at the Carolina 18. Very nice play, both by Manning and Hixon to catch it with two defenders around him. Jacobs gets a yard. 2nd down goes back to the big back for three more yards and a 3rd and 6. Derrick Ward drops the screen pass, and John Carney comes out for the field goal attempt. Kick up and good, 3-0, Giants.

If the Chargers win then Ed Hochuli can breathe a sigh of relief. - SSR

Nuts to that. If anyone's gonna lose to the Colts in the first round, it's gonna be my team, dammit.

"Big Cold and Big Wind will make this a whole different ball game in the second half. To find out just how much it will infect the players, let's go to Andrea Kremer." - Jim Cantore, visiting the sidelines. (Via Anon).

Fuck, it's official. Broncos-Chargers next Sunday. I may have to change my travel plans so I'm able to watch the game, even though I should know better by now.

The Panthers will start at the 23 yard line after the returner got smashed up by Zak DeOssie. DeAngelo Williams starts with a 7 yard carry. Jake Delhomme's first check-down is to Williams, and is dropped. 3rd and 3. Steve Smith catches the lateral, and gets all the way up to the Giants 47 yard line after breaking a couple tackles. "The Playmaker, Utah" -- well, yes he is.

Williams grabs a yard on the next carry. Delhomme dips back and slings one deep for Steve Smith, who brings it in and is brought out of bounds at the 11. Williams is tackled for a loss of about 3 yards on the next play. Williams busts up the middle untouched for the TOUCHDOWN, 13 yard run for the Memphis product. Kick is up and good by John Kasay, 7-3, Carolina.

Madden probably lobbied that he couldn't afford to have to stay in New York and freeze his ass off for a week in order to do the game. He'd much rather go home for the holidays and stay there. How much do you wanna bet that the NBC Saturday Night wild card game is AFC West champ vs. the Colts. - JFein

Makes sense -- the furthest East he'd have to go is Denver.

Giants start at the 26 after the Bradshaw kick return. Jacobs grabs four yards on first down. Manning goes to TOSS for the first down completion. Jacobs runs for 10 for another first down -- he needs a better nickname than Earth. Carolina takes a time out at midfield.

Jacobs grabs four more yards on first down, heading into Panthers territory. Eli then hits TOSS for another chain movement. Two yards more for Jacobs, followed by a check-down pass to the big back for six more. 3rd and 3 at the 31. Ward gets outside on the play, and rushes all the way to the 22.

Two more rushes for Ward result in 3rd and 3 again inside the 15, and the first quarter is done. That was quick. Manning to TOSS inside the 10 for a first and goal. Jacobs rumbles all the way to the 2, and then on the next play, rumbles some more and falls on a Carolina defender in the end zone. Touchdown, Giants. Carney's kick is good, 10-7, Giants.

Panthers start at the 35 after a short kick by the Giants. Jonathan Stewart gets nothing on his first carry and 3 on the 2nd one. 3rd down checkdown to Stewart, who is wide open and gets the first down past his own 40. Delhomme throws to Jeff King, the tight end, who moves the chains again by running into Giants territory. Stewart adds six, running up to about the 31.

Stewart comes off under his own power after having trouble getting up. Williams comes back in, cuts right, then reverses to the left and hits the outside corner for another first down at the 14. Next carry gets him a yard. Steve Smith comes down with the pass inside the 5 for first and goal. Williams loses a yard on the carry. He gets the carry again, this time, he goes inside and sneaks in for the Carolina touchdown! Kasay's kick is good, 14-10, Carolina.

Giants start at the 20 after a touchback. Manning's off on his first down throw, incomplete. Ward busts a tackle and gets to the outside at the 29. For some reason, they handed off to Madison Hedgecock on 3rd down instead of the RBs, and they wind up short. Jeff Feagles punts to Mark Jones at the Carolina 35.

Jake Delhomme throws it up, it's nearly picked off by Aaron Ross, and it makes its way into the hands of Muhsin Muhammad, who rushes all the way to the 5 for a first and goal. Fade route to Muhammad gets to the 2. Screen to Steve Smith -- he grabs it, avoids stepping out of bounds, and hops into the end zone for a Carolina touchdown! Tom Coughlin's challenging whether he was out of bounds.

Wait a minute? Walt Coleman? Isn't he the guy who reversed the call on the Pittsburgh touchdown last week?

Coughlin wins the challenge; Smith is ruled down at the half-yard line. 3rd and goal now.

"Can they make it an 11 point game or a 7 point game?" - Al
"Well, they have the offensive line and running back to make it a 7 point game." - John, whom I think meant to say 11 point game.

Williams goes right in for the score, Kasay's kick is good, 21-10, Panthers. If you're playing in the fantasy football finals today, you're happy if you have Williams tonight.

Bradshaw's return is taken down at the 26. Jacobs runs it up to the 29 on first down. Manning hits tight end Kevin Boss at the 45 to move the chains. Pass to Hixon is incomplete, crowd is booing the non-call. Thomas Davis wraps up Eli and takes him to the ground on 2nd down. Ken Lucas knocks off Derrick Ward for a loss of six on a pass in the backfield; here comes a punt from Feagles. Mark Jones fair catches.

First pass is to Steve Smith for not much, and we're at the two minute warning. Williams gets taken down for not much more on 2nd down. Delhomme's pass is nearly picked by Terrell Thomas, and Jason Baker punts for the first time. Bradshaw takes the punt to the Giants' 45. Ward gets the carry, and weaves his way through a big hole on the right side, avoiding tacklers all the way to the Carolina 21. Ward picks up 4 more on the exact same play on 1st down. Manning's pass deflects off the hands of Boss at the 5. He then throws one right into the hands of Jon Beason, but the linebacker drops it. 4th down. Carney's FG try from 35 -- up and good. 21-13, Panthers.

"Right down Broadway, whether it's in East Rutherford or Manhattan." - Al

Mark Jones takes the kickoff out. Williams will rush it once, and that's halftime. 21-13, Carolina. See you in the next thread.

SNF Live-Blog: Giants @ Cowboys, 2nd Half

Sunday, December 14, 2008

Selita Ebanks used to date the Giants' Osi Umenyiora. That's all I need for inclusion (and to avoid running pictures of either Jessica Simpson, Sophia Bush, Carrie Underwood or any other woman either involved or rumored to be involved with Tony Romo.)

Sinorice Moss takes the kickoff out to the 27 yard line. Ward tries to run, doesn't get much as he's hit by Jay Ratliff, and there's a flag to boot -- oops, horse collar tackle on Ratliff. He learned from the best from Roy Safety Williams. Ahmad Bradshaw gets up to the 43 with his first carry. Manning gets four wide, hits Hixon at the G-men 49. Ward gets the first down as he crosses midfield. Terence Newman sneaks inside position on Hixon and picks Eli off -- and we get a quick shot of Manning Face.

Peyton's Manning Face is better, but Eli's is pretty amusing to see too.

So... is that the one that Osi used to... you know... errr... Drop the deuce on? - Rob in WI

Selita is too classy for that, thank you very much. (EW. EW. EW.) Pitch to Barber gets nothing. Romo aims for Roy Receiver Williams, and it's incomplete. Overthrew him again on 3rd down, and the Cowboys waste a turnover opportunity. McQuarters brings in the punt for a fair catch at the 11.

I gotta say it again: that Geico ad with the cash with eyes took a lot of acid to come up with. Ward doesn't get much on the first down carry. Another false start penalty, and Tom Coughlin looks like he wants to go all Sgt. Hartman on someone. Manning rolls out, hits Hixon on the run, and the wideout makes the marker for a first. Another Ward carry for maybe a yard. Manning to T.O.S.S. on a very good, very accurate throw for 19 yards to the 43. Ward up to the 45.

"And Manning goes down for a fifth time!" - Al

I haven't seen the Giants give up this many sacks in a game in a while -- and that's sack #6, and even more Manning Face.

I guess youre saving the Abby Manning pics for next week - JG

Gotta have something on hand besides Carolina cheerleader photos.

Cowboys cheerleaders have changed into their Santa's Helpers outfits. God, why don't the eagles' cheerleaders have Santa outfits? - James Craven

Because the Iggles' front office hates their fans and hates America.

Romo dumps it off to Witten, who heads up to the Dallas 42 while telling Giants CB Aaron Ross to get the hell out of his way. The Texas Stadium PA plays "Pretty Fly For A White Guy" by the Offspring after that, in a case of curious timing. Romo to T.O. on the short slant, and Owens slips while trying to cut back for the first and more. MB3 gets stuffed by the Giants' D-line on 3rd and 1. Punt goes out of bounds at the 9.

Fuck, I thought this game would have more offense. Manning goes to Bradshaw, who takes it for a first down up to the 25. John is talking about the food at Stubbs again as first down goes nowhere. Manning then overthrows Hixon again -- and Eli is sacked for the seventh time tonight.

All I want for Christmas is a Dallas Cowboy cheerleader. Feagles punts to Crayton, who's tackled at his own 27.

I'm from Wisconsin... I'm a fat guy... even *I* say "Damn" to that sandwich. - Rob in WI

I had a heart attack just looking at it. Romo scrambles all over the place and hits Myles Austin at about midfield. He then hits Martellus Bennett in Giants territory.

"He looks like he could play any sport." - John, on the 6'7" Bennett

Tashard Choice gets to the outside and gets the first down. Romo gets a yard on the next carry, and is slow getting up as the third quarter ends.

If you live in an area with Carl's Jr, they're running really dumb ads for their Steak Sandwich, where this schlub dude tells his girlfriend they're going out for steak and she gets all dressed out. "It's how guys do fancy." I love commercials that sell their food to me by telling me all dudes are cheap schlubs.

Choice rambles on for 22 yards and another first down. He's a Rambling Wreck from Georgia Tech, probably not a hell of an engineer, but he's engineering this drive nicely. 1st and 10 at the Giants' 15. Justin Tuck stops up Choice's next rush. Romo to Witten, he gets to the outside by shaking off Antonio Pierce and he's down at about the 1 or 2. More Offspring. Did Witten pick that song to play after every play he makes? Handoff from the shotgun to Choice -- and he's short. Romo takes the next snap out of the I -- and he finds Dion Anderson wide open for the touchdown! Folk's XP is up and good, 14-3, Dallas.

Draw play out of shotgun on 1st and goal from the one???? Hello, Andy Reid! - Mal

(Giggles.) Ahmad Bradshaw jukes his way out to about the 27 with the kickoff.

Miller Lite: The beer equivalent of a fruitcake as a gift. - Rick James Bible Owner

3rd and 3 for the stalling Giants' offense. Toomer gets the catch at about the 39 yard line for a first down. Bradshaw runs the draw play from the shotgun up to the Giants' 47. Mario Manningham makes his first catch of the game, but he's tackled immediately for a loss. And that 3rd and 4 will become 3rd and 9 after a false start penalty. Manning's throw to T.O.S.S. is incomplete, knocked away by the Dallas corner.

"Winning is a great deodorant, isn't it?" - Al, as they show T.O., Romo, and Witten tracked by War's "Why Can't We Be Friends?"

Hmmm....Romo gets sacked in the end zone. EVERYBODY DO THE SAFETY DANCE! 14-5, Dallas. Romo would, but he can't get up right now. Oh, and they play Men Without Hats? Awesome.



It's like Willow on acid or something. Giants take the kick to the 40, Manning then hits Hixon at the Dallas 41. Ward rushes all the way up to the 28 yard line. No-huddle fun. No luck with the aim for Toomer on first down. Manning aims for Hixon in the end zone, and he can't make the one-handed grab. Where's David Tyree when you need him? Manning's third down throw is incomplete as he's rushed by Brady James coming after him. Carney's FG from 47 is good, 14-8, Dallas.

I've seen the trailer for Seven Pounds dozens of times now and I still don't have a whole lot of an idea of what it's about.

Madden is like Grandpa Simpson in that he tells stories that don't go anywhere. - Walnuts

Now get off his lawn! Austin takes the kick out to the 34 yard line. Choice's 9 yard run is negated by holding on Martellus Bennett. Pass attempt is incomplete as the receiver drops it thanks to a Giants' hit. Choice gets nearly all of those 20 yards back on a nice run into a hole on the right side. MB3 rumbles out to midfield for the first down.

Another rush by Choice, then Witten gets flagged for holding on the next one. Choice gets 14 of it back on 2nd and 23. Giants will use their last time out. Romo goes for Witten, he stretches and leans for the first down at the Giants 38. Shotgun draw to Choice --- AND HE BREAKS FREE FOR THE TOUCHDOWN!

"It's the Good Ship Lollipop!" - Al, in a total WTF moment.

Cowboys going for 2. Romo overthrows the fade to Roy Williams. 20-8, Cowboys.

"Tashard 'The People's' Choice." - Al, inventing a Bermanism.

Manning gets sacked for the 8th time, the third time by DeMarcus Ware, I think. Bradshaw takes it up to the 30. Eli then overthrows Amani Toomer, who has been completely benign to the Cowboys defense all night. Manning then hits Toomer, and Jerry Jones' face is melting.

"Sweetness and light." - Al.

Time's gonna run out on us soon, and on the Giants too. Terence Newman gets his second pick of the night as Manning just aired it out. That'll do it, Cowboys win 20-8, and it sets up a game between the Panthers and Giants next Sunday to determine home-field advantage in the NFC playoffs -- and that'll be next Sunday night. See you then, folks!

SNF Live-Blog: Giants @ Cowboys, 1st Half

I realized I hadn't used a Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders photo all season and I know I've live-blogged several Dallas games this season. Sorry for the oversight.

Marion Barber's in, the Dallas locker room is apparently a disaster area (if you believe ESPN; I think the truth is somewhere between the Four-Letter's hysteria and T.O.'s denial of it all being false), and the Giants want to put away one of their biggest rivals right now.

Myles Austin takes the kickoff out to the Dallas 33 to start. Barber gets the ball first for a yard on the carry. Romo's first pass to Witten is incomplete. Guess that secret-game planning didn't quite work, at least early. Romo goes deep for T.O., and he gets a case of the dropsies with man-to-man coverage.

The boo-birds are out early for Owens. That was quick. R.W. McQuarters gets some change on the punt return, but not much. Start at the 27. DeMarcus Ware ENVELOPS Eli Manning on the first play, and he fumbles, but the Giants recover.

"The over/under on the first T.O. Catch is set at 5:15." - Al, via James Craven

Derrick Ward gets two yards of that nine yard loss back. It'll be 3rd and 17. Chris Canty nails Manning on the 3rd down pass and it falls short. Trading punts early, eh? I thought this wouldn't be so aggressive defensively. Pleasant surprise. Jeff Feagles punts to Patrick Crayton, who gets up to the Dallas 45 for some decent field position.

"He's a great receiver, but he does drop the ball. He doesn't catch it all the time." - John (via JFein)

I want to see a receiver who never drops a pass. It'd be up there with the flying pigs. Shotgun snap blown dead and some funny business between the lines. Witten gets flagged for a false start. Toss to Barber on 1st and 15 loses more yards.

"Get your 340 pounds at least off my guy!" - Al on Flozell Adams and Justin Tuck in a skirmish
"Getting 340 pounds up off anything is really difficult." - John

Another incomplete to Witten. Ball's punted, McQuarters takes it for a fair catch at the 21, but Chase Blackburn is gonna get called for a running into the kicker. However, that's only the five yard variety. Giants ball.

"And so the ball goes over to the Giants." - Al, even after the ref says they have to re-kick. McQuarters takes the ball this time at the 10, as I wonder what Billy Idol's "White Wedding" has to do with football.

"Running into the kicker has to be destroyed. These guys go down faster than a Japanese hooker." - Anon @ 8:37

If you leave only the 15 yard variety, the zebras will start calling that more often, though. Another penalty, this one on the Giants' Rich Seubert for illegal formation, and we'll back it up a bit more. Manning hits The Other Steve Smith, who gets up to the 15. Canty deflects the next pass, and Amani Toomer should have probably held on to that. Eli airs it out for Dominik Hixon, it's incomplete, but they're flagging Terence Newman for P.I. -- and upon replay, that call is complete bullshit. First down at midfield. Ward gets a yard.

Ward gets to the outside to the 41 for a first down, good run and good blocks to get out there. Manning gets another pass tipped. After another Ward run, it's 3rd and 5 at the Dallas 36. Another one tipped away from The Other Steve Smith, and the Giants are punting, trying to pin the Cowboys in. They'll lose five yards on a "snap infraction." Kick bounces inside the 10 yard line, Dallas will start at the 6.

Romo fumbles the snap, picks it up, and hits Witten for three yards. He then goes to Marion Barber, who heads to the 19, barreling over a defender. Move up, Dallas now faces 3rd down after a drop by Tashard Choice. 3rd and 3 becomes 3rd and 8, as Flozell Adams gets flagged for his usual false start penalty. Patrick Crayton comes down with a bullet of the pass at the 35 for a first. Romo then hits T.O. while backpedaling; Owens is at the Giants' 46 before he gets dragged down. Barber gets the next pass, rolling inside the 30 yard line and getting out of bounds.

Rush for very little on first, and Romo gets nailed on 2nd and 8 in the backfield by Renaldo Wynn. 3rd and 14, and Jay Alford takes Romo down again, even with a holding penalty (that's obviously declined). Add another false start and we've got 4th and 26 for a punting down. Paulescu's kick goes into the end zone for a touchback, Romo's still "shaken up", as Al puts it. Meanwhile, Peter King sends a quick text: "R U OK?"

Tony Romo must have said something about Cory Proctor's sister because Proctor is just letting people go by him. - SSR

"I fingerbanged your sister, Cory. How d'you like that?" Or at least I imagine it goes something like that. Ward gets very little on first down to end the first quarter.

As we start the second, Romo has a "lower back contusion" and we're probably going to see Brad Johnson's old, slow butt in there. Brady James gets the sack on Elisha to start, Ward gets very little on 3rd and 17. Feagles punts to Crayton, who brings it out to the 32.

"Zak DeOssie forgot he was supposed to be on the field." - Al
"Have a punt with no snapper." - John

Tony Romo's questionable to return? Peter King (along with 80 percent of ESPN's staff) burst into tears upon hearing that. - Yet Another Idiot With a Music Blog

Romo just got pounded to the ground hard by Mathias Kiwanuka on first down. He's spent more time with his back on the ground or his ass in the air than....oh, fuck it, I can't finish the joke with anything that doesn't gross me out. Tashard Choice, the Rambling Wreck from Georgia Tech, rumbles for 22 yards to the Giants 42. Screen to Owens, he gets a few after avoiding the initial tackle.

"Years from now, there will be some kind of dinner between Jeff Garcia, Donovan McNabb, and Jeff Garcia. What do you think they'll talk about?" - Al

Romo goes whole hog, throwing deep to the sideline for Patrick Crayton -- and he's in the end zone for six! TOUCHDOWN, COWBOYS -- whoa, whoa, Giants say Romo crossed the line of scrimmage.

Yoko's boyfriend is coming back into the game. - James Craven

That's not fair to Yoko Ono. She at least had some discernible talent in the art world. I defy you to give me any area in which Jessica Simpson is talented -- and I'm not including in terms of beauty.

Touchdown stands, Nick Folk's XP is good, 7-0, Dallas. Peter King and all the Dallas-worshippers reach for the hand lotion.

Sinorice Moss takes the kickoff and runs into his teammate at the 19, where he gets pasted by a Dallas special teamer. Manning to Toomer to the 31 for a first down. Eli then goes to Kevin Boss on the left side, and he shakes a tackler for 24 yards to the Dallas 45.

Momma's Boys, Howie Do It,, moving Jay Leno to prime time. NBC is just admitting they have no new ideas whatsoever and would rather just run cheap programming instead of things people want to watch.

Ward gets 4 on 2nd and 5. Offsides penalty gives NY a first down. Another rush for a couple of yards around the corner, and Al just dropped a reference to an inside trader who got busted for a Ponzi scheme in NY this week. Clearly his time with Dennis Miller rubbed off on him as far as odd references go. 2nd down pass in incomplete, mostly thrown to avoid a sack, and Boss didn't see Manning. 3rd and 11. Eli hits T.O.S.S. for 15 yards and another first down.

Ware just made Kareem McKenzie look foolish, and gets his second sack of the night. Manning gets to Hixon at the 16 for the catch to get some of those yards back. Pass is off the hands of Kevin Boss, FG try coming up. Carney's kick is good, 7-3, Dallas.

Austin brings the ball out to about the 29. Romo runs it himself for a couple of yards, then throws to Witten for about 7 or 8 more -- just short of the first. A hands to the face penalty makes it 3rd and 11. Romo overthrows Witten, and Dallas will be punting. McQuarters makes the fair catch at the NY 37.

Manning misses Steve Smith on the first play, and hits him the next time on what appears to be damn near the same play, except T.O.S.S gets flagged for PI for it. Ward gets 9 on 2nd and 20. Two minute warning. Greg Ellis sends Manning to the ground for yet another sack in this game -- how many have we had? I think there have been at least five so far total.

The punt rolls all the way to the 13 yard line. Romo throws it a bit high for T.O. -- and it's gotta be high to overthrow a 6'5" dude. Illegal contact gets called on McQuarters, though. Another pass hit, they're out to the 30 or so. Romo then throws a one-hopper into the ground. Dump-off to Choice, who brings it back to the line of scrimmage. Tony scrambles and gets taken down short of the first down marker. That'll be halftime, folks -- Dallas up 7-3 as we end the first 30 minutes.

I'll have a halftime post up in a minute.