Well if Brett thinks it is....then that HAS to be the case right? Right??? No seriously....I'm really looking for an answer to this one. This isn't a rhetorical question.....I have no idea how to respond to Hockey News anymore.

I'm sure the majority of you are like the rest of me.....you watched hockey when you were younger, you stopped watching it in the past couple of years, and you only "sort of" pay attention once the Stanley Cup rolls around. But as a whole I like the sport, and I LOVE going to games.

With that said......we all know that the strike and TV deals have destroyed the NHL's viewing audience, and Brett Hull is pissed.....

"You need to have some sort of pregame or postgame show so we can sit down and talk about the trade deadline — or the Buffalo-Ottawa (brawl)," Hull says. "I have a lot to say. But in 20 seconds, you have to be some sort of English lit professor to do it with any style or bravado."

"People don't even know that we're on. That's a huge problem," he says about Versus. "We're at the mercy of Versus, NBC, ESPN, CBS. Unless two of them want to show hockey, the NHL is screwed."

It's a very valid point, but one that I think will ultimately not be addressed. To tell you hockey fans the truth I didn't even realize the sport was on NBC until the Caps played the Pens. Adding a half-hour to a pregame isn't going to help when no one watches to begin with. I on the other hand might watch if Brett Hull really is Hockey's Charles Barkley.


No Holding Back For Hull (USA Today)

Okay everyone....let's make a pact. If we are ever in the position where 10s of thousands of people are listening to us talk.......let's NOT make jokes about someones gender, race, and/or sexual orientation. Good? Good.

It blows my mind that A) People still think this way, and B) That they don't understand it's career suicide to talk about their bigotry on-air.

Our latest victim (for lack of a better word) is former Boston Celtic Cedric Maxwell. Ced decided that rather than just criticize (our favorite ref ever!) Violet Palmer for her calls.....that he should make fun of all women.

One of the Celtics players managed to fake out the referee to get a call to go his way. The referee who made this call was Violet Palmer, who happens to be a woman. Cedric Maxwell, the analyst / sidekick on the Celtics broadcast team, proclaimed "Get back in the kitchen!" when she made the call. Max's partner, Sean Grande, tried to throw him a lifeline by pointing out that they had both been previously impressed by Palmer's officiating, but Max continued "Get back in the kitchen and fix me some bacon and eggs!"

If it's worth anything Ced will make an apology on-air tonight. There seems to be one of these every week......Announcers, Color Guys, Analysts, and Hosts......just stop trying to be funny. Just because your Chauvinistic Uncle laughs at the joke doesn't mean it's good for the airwaves.

Celtics Broadcaster To Apologize (CNNSI)
Maxwell Not So Smart (Universal Hub)
Cedric Maxwell Prefers Bacon and Eggs to Pancakes (Fanhouse)

There's really no news this morning besides Pat Summitt's legs and Diarrhea at a Sports Illustrated Party. Soooooo, I'm taking this opportunity to Let you know that I'll be live-blogging the first two days of the tournament (drunk and covered in wing sauce). The goal is to do the whole day, but I very well might die.

Why am I posting this? Well my goal is to get a few people involved with live-blogs in different parts of the country, so we can have all of the games covered. I know "all" of the games getting a live-blog is quite a task, but we can probably come close. I'll have the March Madness On-Demand for the computer, but if we're missing some then I'll just update you on the stats and scoring as it happens.

I figure most people will be at work that day, so I want to make sure everyone knows what's going down up to the minute. If you have ideas, or want to be involved, shoot me a quick email at AwfulAnnouncing@gmail.com.

Also, I'll be putting together a Bracket Contest similar to the Bowl Pick Em' Contest (with better prizes)....more news on this and the live-blogs soon.

Happy Madness,
AA

Lost in all of the Pat Summitt/Tennesse stuff (video below) was a great showing by Michigan at home against Michigan State. Part of the way through the game Steve Lavin was joking with Brent on his first and middle names......what happened next can only be described as very very odd.

Lavin begins by busting on Musburger's middle name (which is Woody). Lavin jokingly admits he gots from the production truck. From there Brent brings up Google, and Lavin throws in YouTube. Well that's when it gets weird.......

Don't know if you remember this Deadspin piece on Karros and Andrews, but Lavin one-ups our friend Eric at the :54 second mark.



"Go look up Erin Andrews on YouTube......My Goodness."- SL

Not sure where Stevie was going with that one, but it comes off awfully sexist. We make light of Erin Andrew's good looks, but she really is a good reporter. It's one thing to be ogled on the internet, but to be called out by your co-workers is a little uncalled for.
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Here's the Pat Summitt Video......it was actually pretty boring. I respect Tennesse's school pride, but that was stupid.

Wow....and I thought the Dickie V story was going to carry the day.....

You may have seen this item about Tommy Lasorda on Deadspin today. Well Sports By Brooks has obtained excerpts from the book, and they are special......(NSFW Reading)

CHAPTER 12: Gibson, who refers to herself as "Sasha", writes that she got a call from client "Jim in Chicago" who recommends Lasorda (Lasorda, "Sasha" (Gibson) and "Nanna" quotes are in italic).

Lasorda: "I’m interested in spending some time with someone."

Sasha/Gibson: "Sounds fine. Have you had a chance to look at my California Dreamin’ website? Perhaps there’s someone there you like?"

Lasorda: "Actually, I have. There’s a pretty blonde on there I’d like to meet. #6."

Sasha/Gibson: "She’s a sweetie. Her name is Nanna. She’s Swedish, about 5’6’’, nice perky 34b, slim and terrific company. Perhaps you can tell me what you’re looking for? Anything in particular I should know?"

I had to ask the standard question.

Lasorda: "Actually, Sash, I’d like to have some porn for me to watch while she sucks my (expletive). I’m into watching two gals together in a movie. Can she have that there?"

I started a file on Tommy and began to make the pertinent notes.

Sasha/Gibson: "How much time are you looking to spend?"

Lasorda: "I’m not sure, maybe an hour and a half. I don’ t have that much time. How much for that?"

Sasha/Gibson: "It’s $1,000 per hour. So that would cost you $1,500. You can visit her at her place. She lives in the Hollywood area."

Lasorda: "That sounds fine, Sash. I’m looking to get together this week. I’m thinking Thursday late afternoon. I’ve got to get home to the wife for dinner."

(Edit: Nanna reports to Sasha/Gibson after Lasorda encounter)

Nanna: "He was super easy and a really nice guy. You were right on all counts, Sasha. First he requested I pop in my girl, girl porn movie. … He just loved watching all that! I noticed though that he wasn’t the aggressive type."

Sasha/Gibson: "Really? What makes you say that?"

Nanna: "Well, here I had this real hot porn movie on. He enjoyed watching the girl, girl bisexual sex scenes best. He started to take his (expletive - p****) out and (expletive - m*****bate).

"Then when I saw he was good and hard I started to suck his (expletive - p****). He really liked that! Then I used your ‘swirly’ move and relaxed my throat muscles so I could take him deep into my throat.

"The great (oral sex) skills you (Sasha/Gibson) taught me plus the porn really got him off."

Good lord Tommy. I normally wouldn't be bothered by an old man seeking some "love", but that cheating on the wife thing is pretty bad. 55 years is a long time to be with someone. You deny your son is gay and died from AIDS and now this?

Excerpt from Madam's Book On Lasorda Encounter (SbB)

I don't know how in the world how you would have not gone to both AA and The Big Lead (well actually them first), but in case you didn't........

From Sports by Brooks comes this amazing photo collection of ESPN personalities acting like you and me. We/I do make fun of them a lot.....but they like chicks, booze, and free-styling just like us!

If you're at ESPN (and reading this) consider this a reprieve from the ever watching announcing eye for a bit. You are normal people and make mistakes....I promise to leave you alone for a tad (Well, at least until Dick Vitale goes on air tonight in Tennessee).

My two personal favorites.....


Go to SbB for the rest.

Bill Parcells has officially received a verbal offer from ESPN. I know....we kind of already knew that. But the funny part is the terms....

Parcells has a verbal agreement to join ESPN's "Monday Night Countdown" cast and likely will sign the deal this week or next, a network source said. Parcells sought a limited schedule with little travel and is expected to be based at ESPN's Bristol, Conn., studio.

Umm, wait a second.......isn't EVERY person from ESPN that is involved in the NFL "based out of Bristol"???? I'm not quite sure I understand. It's not like College Gameday where they travel from city to city.....all though that might not be a bad idea.

Neil Best (Newsday)
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Local DC Metro Info (Feel free to skip if you don't care about the O's or Nats):

The O's and Nats have settled on their P-B-P guys/gals for the upcoming 2007 season. The O's will split duties between Gary Thorne and Jim Hunter on MASN with Jim Palmer, Buck Martinez, and Rick Dempsey doing color. (I approve of none of these but Hunter and Martinez, but I'll give Dempsey a shot....he could be entertaining. Jim Palmer can go to hell.)

For the Nats....Bob Carpenter is back and will be aided by Don Sutton.

Boring stuff right? Well check out the "sideline" reporters.....The O's have hired FOX 45's Amber Theoharis, and the Nationals have tabbed Debbi Taylor for the role. I can't find a photo of Debbi Taylor, but Amber is very "Amy Smartish" don't you think? Someone alrert The Big Picture!

Maybe Irvin wasn't blowing smoke when he said he left to pursue his "acting" career??? Dallas News reporter Barry Horn leads me to believe it was because Irvin really did want to explore other avenues of work.

Irvin, buoyed by his new Pro Football Hall of Fame status, overestimated his value to ESPN.

When the parties couldn't decide on a dollar amount, Irvin asked about supplementing his income outside the ESPN empire. He says he was told he could but only if ESPN, which doesn't like to have its employees appear elsewhere, approved of the project.

End of negotiations.

That actually makes a ton of sense. Call Irvin what you will, but I don't portray him as a liar. I might actually be turning around on him a bit if he stood up to the Leader (Come on, I said MIGHT! be).

ESPN protected Irvin for quite sometime, and with him gone it looks like (FREE) Harold Reynolds! is the loser in all of this.....Well, and Michael Irvin who might get the Craig Kilborn/David Caruso treatment when looking for work. But I'm fine with that.

Money Matters Made Irvin Leave ESPN (Dallas News)

Great tip this morning from Chris Vernon at 730 ESPN in Memphis.

When are people going to realize that EVERYTHING they say or do is going to end up on these here intrawebs? Dickie, Dickie, Dickie....my boy Dick. I think by the end of today you may have dug yourself a pretty big hole......Audio Clip 1 and Audio Clip 2

ESPN sportscaster Dick Vitale was a big hit on the News Sentinel’s Sports Page on Monday morning. But he didn’t realize it until it was too late.

Vitale, who called on his cell phone into the radio show, apparently didn’t know he was on the air with Mike Griffith and John Adams of the News Sentinel when he repeated a "confidential" conversation with Florida coach Billy Donovan.

Griffith tried to get Vitale’s attention but the popular basketball analyst continued his conversation with someone at the Broken Egg restaurant in Siesta Key, Fla. , while he was on the air with Griffith and Adams. Vitale said Donovan told him in confidence that NBA scouts were making a big mistake if they rated Florida’s Joakim Noah ahead of teammate Al Horford.

Not really a big deal until you hear the audio. He does it in this serious Dickie V voice and it is just too damn funny. The first clip starts right up with Vitale not knowing he's on air. He then tries to back-peddle in the second clip by calling the radio show back and saying, "His comments were all in jest." Suuuuure Richard....suuuuure.

Dickie V lays into the Radio hosts pretty hard and calls them "unprofessional", but it looks like the unprofessional label needs to be on the other shoe.

Donovan's response......."I can't comment on something I never said."

Vitale Repeats "Confidential Chat" On-Air (KnoxNews.com)

You ask for it, and you get it. The Shaun Livingston injury from last night. Brace yourself because this one is harder to watch than the Brian Butch one from yesterday.


Video: Shaun Livingston Dislocation

Ugh.....I can only watch that once.

This nightmare of a vid was found at Fanhouse via MSN's Soapbox. (Don't look at the photo below if you don't have to.)


Thanks to Josh for posting this in the comments. I remembered seeing it somewhere but couldn't find it for the life of me.

God this is the worst commercial I've seen in quite sometime. It's Dickie V doing a spot for Hooters, and the graphics are amazing!



I really thought this was a local spot when I first saw it. In fact, I was pretty sure Crystal Koons was involved (sorry if that's too inside.....email me if you need clarification).

There's one thing that can still make me cringe more than awkward Real World fights and Pineapple. That thing my friends is broken and/or dislocated limbs. And since I've been trying in vain to center that d*** banner ad on the main page (and make it link for two hours now).....I'm giving up and posting this video as your end of the day signal.



Butch will be out with an "Elbow" for quite some time I assume.

(Video from Lion In Oil)

Not that this will compare in annoyance to NASCAR Now, but AA has just learned that ESPN will be producing a "College Football Live" program to mirror "NFL Live" before and during the season. The show is set to begin July 23rd and air at 3:30pm (EST) Monday through Friday. From David Berson, ESPN senior vice president of programming.....

"College football fans want more content," Berson says. "This has been a long time coming. It's a natural extension for us. We expect it to become a staple of our programming, like NFL Live and Baseball Tonight."

Who's involved you ask? (In know that's all you really care about anyway)

Modeled after the network's daily NFL Live, the new show will be hosted mostly by Rece Davis and feature breaking news, features and analysis. Davis will be joined by a rotating mix of ESPN's college football talent, including Lee Corso and Kirk Herbstreit from College GameDay, Lou Holtz, Mark May, Bob Griese, Doug Flutie, Todd Blackledge, Craig James and Ed Cunningham.

Not a bad lineup if you ask me. You got the stoners James and Flutie.....(2/3rds of) the Gameday Team.....and some pretty solid fillers there. As long as Sean Salisbury isn't involved....I'm cool. The glaring omission seems to be Chris Fowler though. Little explanation is given as to why he's not involved as Berson says, "He's got a lot of other responsibilities."

Hmmm.......

I had this sweet Hooters commercial with Dickie V lined up for this morning, but the video was all funked up. So you most likely will see that tomorrow morning.....and it's brilliant.

In the news department it seems like ESPN is sticking with Cold Pizza. As many of you know CP will be moving to Bristol June 1st, and will be taking on a new name. In addition the show will incorporate Mike and Mike in the morning, and bring in some fresh faces.

[Norby] Williamson "wants [‘Cold Pizza’] to be more news program than fluffy morning show” and said that ESPN will “more closely integrate it with its lead-in,” a simulcast of ESPN Radio’s "Mike & Mike in the Morning." Williamson: "We’ve made it more of a first take (on the news). We want to expand that."

So will those fresh faces finally rid of us Skip Bayless? Ummm....unfortunately no.

"Similar to 'The Sports Reporters,' ESPN will build a rotating team of four or five commentators to go head-to-head with” commentator Skip Bayless.

So if anyone has a new name for the program....I'd love to hear it!

Hold the Cheese (USA Today)

Obviously there are a few kinks to work out, but I hope you can stand the new look. The old look was fine, but there are just too many people in Blogger Land that look the same.

Double check your link to make sure it's still there, and I'll be back in a few with some fun and interesting news.

XOXO,
AA

From Sports by Brooks comes this ridiculously funny video of Utah State fans mocking New Mexico State coach (and former star of Hangtime) Reggie Theus.

Enjoy and have a great weekend.....a new look is coming to AA coming after the weekend break!

It was windy as all hell in the Sports Blogging Mecca last night, so of course Comcast was screwed up. I had to watch basketball games that paused every4 seconds, so any video was choppy. Rather than subject you Charles Barkley's response to Mike D'Antoni I found you this to discuss. From Fanhouse via Ben Maller.

Looks like Michael Irvin and Tom Jackson are actually pretty close......

"When I talked to Tom we cried like babies. We just cried like babies. We had such great times together. And it was so amazing to have 2 grown men on the phone crying like we were crying...about not working together again. But then it says so much to how we enjoyed working together."

Awww. You cried with your sweet little retard. That's soooooo cute! I'm okay with crying, but "2 grown men on the phone crying" is not "amazing".

When I say rumor.....I mean RUMOR!. This comes in an email from a friend of a friend who's mom's cousin works for ESPN (or something like that).

A buddy of mine at ESPN just told me they received a memo today saying that Stephen A. Smith will start anchoring Sportscenter sometime next week.

Hmmm that sounds like it could be made up....buuuut I did some searching and found this:

His first show will be Sunday with Bob Ley. I know this b/c I was at a conference earlier this week at which he spoke. He was surprisingly good with his remarks and very candid as you might expect. He had complete control of the room, esp. during the Q&A period.

Much more substantial.....still not verified though. It does make sense though. Not in the "sports fans will enjoy it" sense, but more along the "he's crazy and will fit right in with our new let's annoy the crap out of people stance".....sense.

This doesn't surprise me one bit, and I can't wait for Stu "Pink Eye" Scott and S.A.S. to be on the same show.

So on the main page of the Leader they have a Scoop Jackson interview of Tim Hardaway that just blew my mind. It's not the interview (Scoop asks the right questions), but of course it's the responses have me reeling. So rather than tear the article down (plenty of others will do that), and basically get nowhere.....I'm just going to focus on a small part of it. You can read the whole thing for yourself, but I warn you....it will more than likely just make you lose more respect for Hardaway.

I Don't Have a Hate Bone In My Body (Page 2)

"Yes. I understand it, believe me I understand it. But that doesn't mean that I'm going to run from any situation. I didn't grow up like that. I was always taught if you do something, face the piper. Try to make it right. That's what I'm trying to do. But I still don't think for 30 seconds of what I said, that that should be it. I could see two or three days, if I did something on that level for a couple of days, over a weekend. But for one thing said? For the rest of my life I should be known for this?!? When Charles Barkley said he don't like white people, after a year or six months he's back in the good graces with everyone."

Charles Barkley has a white wife!?!?!?!?!? Are you kidding me Timmy? I understand that Charles was raked through the coals a bit, but seriously that's just a classless thing to do. That's like when Kobe was in panic mode and called out Shaq for cheating on his wife.

The best part of the article is the first paragraph. Scoop explains why he wanted to do the article because he and Hardaway are "tight".

"What do you do when you see your friend in the middle of the ocean drowning?"

Well Scoop....most people would throw them a life preserver, but you my friend.....you threw a boulder at Timothy. Read the rest and see.....I'm done with absent-minded people like Hardaway.

Who are we supposed to be challenged by again? New York??? Whatevs. Not even close. One special little Red Sox Bar within the territory we DCers call Georgetown was over-run.....NAY!.....conquered by the DC Blogging Community.

There was beer.....there was ACC basketball.....there were people walking out on their tabs. Wait....what did you say??? Yep, someone walked out on their tab.....here are the early odds:

DC Sports Bog (50 to 1)- I'm not sure what the WaPo pays these days, but he's a longshot. You never know though....he's got a baby on the way, and babies need their formula.

Mister Irrelevant (50 to 1)- Cold Pizza pays him nothing, but AOL sure does. Don't see the Blogfather going this far, but you never know.

Ryan from Fanhouse (40 to 1)- Again AOL pays people, but Ryan graciously bought me a Sierra Nevada with straight cash homey, so he may not have had a tab to begin with.

Miss Chatter from Just a Nats Fan (30 to 1)- Didn't stay the entire night, and I only met her on her way out, so she's an underdog as well.

JammingEcono from Banks of the Anacostia (30 to 1)- Another Nats blogger......they are still bitter about not getting anything for Soriano.....they very well might be taking it out on the city.

Kyle Gustafson from Information Leafblower and DCist (25 to 1)- The DCist supports local businesses better than anyone, so I don't think they would rob the little guys. But maybe....just maybe they got food poisoning from The Rhino Bar at one point or another, and this is payback.

Marc Gallant from Needs More Meat, MDT from Daily Sports Haiku and Gustafsson from On Frozen Blog. (15 to 1)- All very awesome dudes. I know OFB got to go to the Opening of the Caps Practice Facility in Ballston, so Ted Leonsis could be paying them too. Also, people who right poetry are usually into Karma and stuff.......but good odds if you think it's one of them.

The Comcast TV Dudes (10 to 1)- This whole TV thing could be a setup. They might be tired of Bloggers making fun of Chick Hernandez, so they've setup a crime spree with the ultimate goal of placing the blame on the Blogging Community.

Jarkko from The Wizznutzz (5 to 1)- Those Wizznutzz are crazy characters. They could need funding for their next t-shirt....."It Ain't Ova Til Tha Brenda Haywood Sings". (God damn I'm clever....someone buy a Homing Pigeon and get that to them stat!)

Christmas Ape from KSK (5 to 1)- What does KSK call themselves.....A Mafia....and what do Mafias do??? I'm just sayin'....

AA (3 to 1)- I just created a logo out of two anarchy symbols.....I'm dangerous. (Also, I am looking away in the photo. Judas anyone???)

Unsilent Majority from KSK (3 to 1)- Anyone who gets into a trash-talking war with Ricky Davis clearly isn't stable. (No Jew jokes either....that's not the direction I'm taking this)

289 of With Leather Photoshopping Fame (OFF- No Line).- Seriously, the dude is responsible for things like this (below).......and he's a free lance photographer. Wait a tic......maybe......nahhhhhh.
























So who you got??? Only a few people know who it really is, so no cheating. And if you know....don't spoil it. I'll leave the post up top for awhile.

It's the Final Countdown folks, and guess what??? Not a damn thing is new. Go about your business and stop by every so often. I'll keep my eyes peeled for you.

HOLY CRAP.....RIGHT AT 3.....GUESS WHO GOT TRADED?!?!?!?!

No one.

Yep, that's right. All of those supposed rumors, and the only players involved are Juan Dixon (your mouth), Fred Jones, Anthony Johnson, and a 2nd Round Pick (I'm betting on Ekene Ibekwe). I think FOX, CBSSportsline, and Yahoo actually played it perfectly. Let ESPN waste all of their time and resources hunting this crap down, and talk about it later if it even happens at all.

I'm sick of trade deadlines......next time remind me NOT to do this.

(P.S.- Some trades always come through the wire after 3pm, so I reserve the right to take all of that back.)

Trade #2- Fred Jones to Portland, Juan Dixon to the Raptors- Rotoworld 1:04pm

Exciting stuff we've got going on here. Rotoworld reports it, but credits ESPN. Chad Ford has yet to say anything about it.

Ahhh figured it out. Ric Bucher reported it....making Chad Ford's chat pretty irrelevant.

That's it for Chad. He's off to call Bryan Collangelo and beg him for a scoop. Sorry for ignoring the rumors, but I really thought Chad was going to bring us more than just Anthony Johnson.
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More ESPN Rumors:

Rumor: Carter to the Magic for Darko, Hedo Turkoglu, and JJ Redick

Rumor: Jason Richardson to the Nets

Rumor: Kings trying to make a play for Kidd

Rumor: Etan Thomas to the Bulls

Rumor: Adonal Foyle to the Blazers, Jamaal Magloire to the Warriors
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Interesting story I came across in the Arizona Republic. Mike D'Antoni is firing back at comments made about the Suns using a short rotation. Who made the comments? Sir Charles of course.

D'Antoni said he wasn't sure he should take basketball advice from someone who "choked" away championships and had his own playoff conditioning questioned.

Obviously more to come on this with TNT airing games tonight. I'll probably have video up at some point.
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CBS Sportsline just now put up the Johnson Trade (1:30pm). Nothing from Fox or Yahoo.
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That's it for hour two, and it has been a quiet one. Nothing came out of it besides some Barkley trash talk. New thread for the last hour, and any other deals that trickle through. We'll be back to your regular AA at 3pm. I have a couple of other items for the end of the day.

So your first rumor of the day is in from Contra Costa Times.....

Michael Pietrus to Portland for Juan Dixon (Denied by the Warriors)- Via Rotoworld 10:55am

Good move on their part. Looks like Pietrus is available though. I'm a big fan of his actually....I think he would thrive away from G-State. You would have thought with the Dunleavy Trade that he would get some PT, but not when you trade Forwards for Forwards.

Rumor: Minnesota's Mike James to Houston (Hinges on Eddie Griffin inclusion)- Houston Chronicle.

Not likely to happen, and the article doesn't even say who the the Timberwolves would get.
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Here comes the ESPN Hype Machine......from Chris Sheridan (Insider) come these "possible" deals.

Rumor: Kidd to the Lakers for a combination of Kwame Brown, Chris Mihm, Aaron McKie, Jordan Farmar, and a 1st Round Pick.

Not a chance in hell. The Nets are said to want Odom or Bynum in any deal.

Rumor: Vince Carter to the Clippers for Shaun Livingston and Corey Maggette

Rumor: Mike James to the Kings, Drew Gooden to the Timberwolves, Bibby to the Cavs

Rumor: Marcus Banks to Cleveland, Damon Jones to the Suns

Rumor: Bonzi Wells to Chicago, Michael Sweetney to the Rockets

Rumor: Wells to Detroit for Flip Murray and Dale Davis

Rumor: PJ Brown to the Mavs for ???

Rumor: Fred Jones to Portland, Juan Dixon to Toronto

Rumor: Jackie Butler from the Spurs to the 76ers

Again....all ESPN Hype, but we'll see what transpires. Chad Ford is on at noon (SportsNation), so he'll be pimping one of those 4-team 17 player deals that never happens.
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ESPN is now saying that Scottie Pippen's most likely destination is Cleveland. They are reporting that he had an interview recently and that the Cavs are interested
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Rumors from Ben Maller at FoxSports........

Rumor: Carter to the Knicks for Channing Frye, Jammal Crawford, and Malik Rose (Riiiiiiight)

Rumor: Kidd to the Suns?!?!?! for Raja Bell, Kurt Thomas, and the Hawks 1st Rounder acquired in the Joe Johnson trade.

Rumor: Corey Maggette to the Jazz, Gordon Giricek and Rafael Araujo's expiring contract to the Clippers.

None of which are going to happen......
________________________________

Chad Ford: (12:02 PM ET ) Aloha everyone. Whoa ... this room is crowded already. Give me one sec, just finishing up a call with a GM ... I'll be right back. Keep sending in your questions ...

Hahahaha. Of course you are Chad....or course you are. Chad also says that Jason Kidd is staying in New Jersey....

(Side Note: I know that you can just go and read the chat yourself, so I'll try not to freak out everytime Chad says something like....."Kidd to Wizards for Arenas and Calvin Booth")

This trade deadline is going to suck (like it does every year)....Chad just commented that Bibby and Mike James aren't looking like their moving. If you're keeping count that's 3 so far.
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Rumor from Memphis Commercial Appeal: Chucky Atkins, Stromile Swift, Dahntay Jones, and Damon Stoudemire are on the block.
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First trade of the day.......Anthony Johnson to the Hawks, 2nd Round Pick to the Mavs (Blockbuster Deal!!!!)- Reported by Chad Ford at 12:18 (No one else has it yet)
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Ford says Abdur-Rahim to the Bulls is unlikely. How funny would it be if only Anthony Johnson got traded?

Chadwick also has to see his numbers dwindling in the chat because he just threw out this Rumor: Drew Gooden to the Suns for Marcus Banks, Kurt Thomas, and some draft Picks. Cause getting a slow as Drew Gooden would fit in that offense.

I'm seriously falling asleep now. I would take anyone going to anywhere at this point. Chad is answering Kevin Garnett questions now, and the Wolves aren't going to trade him (which is retarded on McHale's part).
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Players Chad thinks are getting traded: Jamaal Magloire, and........umm, that's it. YEAAA!

The Atlanta Constitution Journal gets wind of the Anthony Johnson deal. Way to make up for passing on Chris Paul, Hawks!- 12:41pm

Chad Ford Rumor: Toronto wants Darko

From The NJ Star Ledger......Nets cutting off all talk of Kidd to Lakers unless they include Bynum.
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One Hour Down.....2 to go. New Thread coming......

If you're like me you probably forgot that the trade deadline was today. So are you ready for mediocre players and contracts to be moved?!?!?!?!?! I sure the hell am. Let's take a look at the rumored (kinda like the departed). I've scoured the sites and papers, and this is who I've got.

Pau Gasol, Luol Deng, Shareef Abdur-Rahim, Corey Maggette, Ray Allen, Rashard Lewis, Ben Gordon, Kirk Hinrich, Andres Nocioni, Zach Randolph, Jason Kidd, Vince Carter, Luther Head, Bonzi Wells, Mike Bibby, Mike James, Michael Pietrus, Andrew Bynum, Salim Stoudamire, Etan Thomas, Brenda Haywood, Jamaal Magloire, Luke Ridnour, Beno Udrih, Nazr Mohammed, Anthony Johnson, Marcus Banks, and.....as always.....Kevin Garnett.

So how many of those players are actually going? Well according to ESPN all of them. The rumors will be thrown around all day, but my guess is about 15% of those folks will actually move (you can check my math later today). So do your best to stay away from the ESPN hype-machine, and stick to the real reporters, and more informative sites.

Keep your eye on David Aldridge of the Philly Inquirer. Saw him on TNT the other night and he had the bluetooth hands free sitting on the desk ready to go. Even though he's gone from ESPN he still has a TON of contacts.

Also, head to Rotoworld. They scour the papers and have info up within minutes.

And finally, you can head back here. I'm going to have an open thread for the day breaking down all of the trades. I know it's not Announcing, but I'm going to try and get all Big Lead on this deadline and see how many trades ESPN will poach by saying they broke the story. Should be fun.....I did this last year (in the early days of AA) for the Baseball deadline, and it turned out great.
___________________________

One team that may be looking is the Heat. If you missed it.....D-Wade's shoulder got pretty jacked up last night and he could miss up to six weeks. Here are the photos.











































Okay.....seriously....I know shoulder separations hurt like a mother (I've had one), but did you really need to be taken off in a wheel chair.

GET KNOCKED DOWN 7 TIMES GET CARTED OFF ONCE

Readers, commenters, degenerates and bloggers who live in the DC Area are invited to an impromptu Happy Hour at Rhino Bar in Georgetown this evening starting at 7p EST (obviously). You may already be aware that DC Sports Bog, 2/5ths of KSK, Information Leafblower, and Mister Irrelevant will be there (at least that's all I know of...there could be more)........but it's official, so will I. So if you AA readers are dying to meet your fearless leader and buy him 1.....or umm, 15 beers. This is your chance!

Rhino Bar and Pumphouse (????.....odd place to choose) is at the top of M Street right near the Key Bridge. How will you know which place? Well it's got a damn Rhino on it.....you can't miss it. Hope to see you out there circa 7p.

(Stole the Spray Paint idea from 289. But that anarchy thing could catch on. All the kids are wearing the patches on their jean jackets these days.)

Besides Stu Scott giving pink eye to everyone in Las Vegas.......there isn't much going on today. That was until I was flipping through Brandweek.com (yes, I know I'm a nerd).

In the first news from the company since sock-makers Gold Toe and Moretz merged last October, GoldToeMoretz has announced the signing of New Orleans Saints running back Reggie Bush as a rep for Gold Toe brand men's dress socks. Bush will be featured in Gold Toe advertising via BBH, New York, which will include national print ads. Creative is in planning stages. He also will make appearances on behalf of the collection.

Wow that's pretty odd, but hey they're paying you right? Something like this would NEVER happen in the NBA though. Their image is too hip-hop to be posing for sock ads. So Hip-Hop that they do Lawnmower ads?!?!?!?!

The next thing NBA star LeBron James should push in national TV ads should be …lawn tractors?

Yes, those riding lawn mowers that are the most enduring symbol of suburbia. In Las Vegas on a lawn painted green to look like it needed mowing, the Cleveland Cavalier shot ads Monday for mower marketer Cub Cadet. Said James, whose TV ads for the Cleveland-based company's Time Saver "zero-turn riders" make their debut next month: "Expect the unexpected when it comes to LeBron James."

Good lord it's a slow news day for me to be talking about this stuff. Very unexpected King James, and perhaps the socks can help Reggie Bush from turning his ankle so much.

Heistand (USA Today)
Sock Maker Signs Reggie Bush (Brandweek)

This time it's good news, but National Media might be a stretch. ESPNU plans to air the first game back for the Duke Lacrosse program after the whole rape issue forced them to shutdown last season.

Now with new coach John Danowski, whose son Matt is a team co-captain, the team will lead off ESPNU's expanded lacrosse coverage. Additions this year include a lacrosse studio show and coverage of all 15 games in the NCAA Division I tournament — including three on ESPN or ESPN2.

The game is against Dartmouth, so there's probably going to be some of this going on. If you get the game....please drink every time the case is mentioned.

Had a couple of things I wanted to link this morning, so check them out if you have a second...

A site called Fox Atomic has made me their featured blog (bottom of the front page) for some reason. I got the email at about 5pm last night.....did some searching around, and found out that the site is pretty cool. It's a faction of Fox that focuses on providing entertainment to 18-24 year olds. Their goal is to produce/acquire 8 films a year, and the next one up is The Hills Have Eyes 2. I'm unfortunately out of their demographic, but I loved THHE 1. Pretty crazy stuff.

Some other fun thing from the AA Inbox..........

Apparently our HOF friend Dick Vitale is motivating the Pittsburgh Pirates for some reason. (Mondesi's House)

One More Dying Quail put together some of the best Major League Products Commercials.....funny stuff.

And my favorite story this morning (barely beating the other two) is this prank from the Orlando Sentinel.

A seven-by-ten-foot electronic movable message board alongside Interstate 4 in Florida that was "supposed to warn motorists of an upcoming exit" was reprogrammed by a prankster Saturday night to read, "NASCAR sucks. Go home."

Too funny......see you later on today.

This had me rolling when I saw it, so I had to post it.....enjoy!



Wait......you didn't see it the first time? Okay sorry....I'll freeze frame it for you.

















Okay.....first of all.....hilarious. Second.....chick up front......are you getting the Shocker or something???

Lost in all of the Gilbert Arenas, Tim Hardaway, All-Star Game and Florida Mascot nonsense I regretfully forgot to give congrats to Basketball Hall of Fame nominee Richard J. Vitale. He's pretty much a shoe-in, so I will honor him in the only way I know how. To mention 156 things that have nothing to do with Dickie V., Basketball, or the Hall of Fame.

1. Cartography
2. Retirement Communities
3. Manila Folders
4. Gastroentenology
5. Grey's Anatomy
6. Bowling Trophies
7. Digital Camera
8. The Hard Rock Cafe- San Antonio
9. Wizard of Oz
10. Where the Wild Things Are
11. Bryan College in Tennessee
12. Charlie Brown
13. Halloween Costumes
    
14. James Joyce
15. MySpace
16. Wet Dreams
17. Toyota Camry
    
18. The Dancing Presidents from those Mortgage Pop-up ads
19. Jeopardy
20. Thermonuclear War
21. Chloe O'Brian
22. Sushi
23. Power Point Presentations
24. Post It Notes
25. Karl Marx
26. Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon
27. Don Quixote
28. Pie Charts
29. Ultimate Frisbee
30. Mount Rushmore (Side Note: This is really hard.....you should try it sometime.)
31. Birth- The Movie with Nicole Kidman
32. HUGH!
33. Barbershop Quartets
34. Scrubs
35. Arial Font
36. Jet Skis
37. Bindie The Jungle Girl
38. The War of 1812
39. The Perfect Storm
40. Sleet
41. Dwight Shrute
42. Ben Folds Five
43. Waterbeds
44. Trampolines
45. The Pommel Horse
46. Lawn Mowers
47. The Wright Brothers
48. Gerber Daisies
49. Excel Spreadsheets
50. Car Insurance
51. In and Out Burger
52. The Mall of America
53. Ground Rule Doubles
54. Hall and Oates
55. Thermodynamics
56. Venice Beach
57. Taco Bell/KFC Combo Restaurants
58. Soho
59. Long-Distance Calling Plans
60. Emo Music
61. Interest Rates
62. Carlos Mencia
63. Celery
64. Logan International Airport
65. Barack Obama
66. Thanksgiving
67. Micro Economics
68. No Limit Records
69. Fire Hydrants
70. Wifebeaters
71. East Coast Bias
72. The Blue Angels
73. Slip and Slides
74. Cumulus Clouds
75. El Nino (Seriously.....I'm not kidding. This is f'ing impossible)
    
76. Scholarships
    
77. Final Fantasy
78. The Band Creed
79. Online Poker
80. Satan
81. Johnny Cash
82. Platechtonics
    
83. I-95
84. Grizzly Bears
85. Gay Pride Parade
86. John Waters
87. Edgar Allan Poe
88. Granite Countertops
89. Single Parents
90. Medical Marajuana
91. King Tut
92. Excitebike
93. UTZ Crab Potato Chips
94. Des Moines, Iowa
95. Rattlesnakes (I'm slowing down here folks...can't think....anymore)
    
96. Fractions
97. Cassiopeia
98. Hot Tubs
99. Frank Geary
100. Crown Point, Indiana
101. The St. Louis Arch
102. Pot Roast
103. Meat Loaf (the Singer)
104. Microbreweries
105. Dig Dug
106. Mormons
107. The Regal Beagle
108. The Department of Motor Vehicles
109. Sunset Park
110. Pine Trees
111. Aircraft Carriers
112. The ESPYs
113. The Cosby Kids
114. Caddyshack
115. Reno 911
116. Longitude
117. Mongoose Bikes
118. Skirmishes
119. Lord of the Rings Risk
120. Baby Showers
121. Bubble Hockey (I'm the U.S.....you can be the Russians)
122. Red Dawn
     
123. Botany
124. Medieval Times
125. Chef Boyardee
126. March of the Penguins
127. Erin Andrews (had to do it....she doesn't stay out of my mind for more than 10 minutes)
128. Chapstick
129. Readers Digest
130. Stress Balls
131. Kevin Federline
132. Skepticism
133. Domino Sugar
134. Domino (The Rapper)
135. Parapa Tha Rappa
136. Dance Dance Revolution
137. Hopscotch
138. Yahtzee
139. Wombs
140. Spelunking
     
141. Easter Island
142. 3-D Puzzles
143. The Pony Express
144. Fortnights
145. The SAG Awards
146. Ravishing Rick Rude
147. Fluffers (you know.....like in porn.)
148. Prom Queens
149. Librarians
150. Dead Baby Jokes
151. Chipotle
152. Reparations
153. Orange Mocha Frappachinos
154. Black Eyed Peas (the food)
155. Polygamy
     

............and finally................

156. Brontosaurus

Good lord that was damn near impossible. Congrats Richard......you're as crazy and pointless as ever!

NAISMITH MEMORIAL BASKETBALL HALL OF FAME ANNOUNCES FINALISTS FOR ELECTION IN 2007 (Hoophall.com)

(Special thanks to Awful Officiating for reminding me.)

Did you ever wonder what would happen to a semi-relevant person who makes disparaging comments towards the Gay Community? Well here's the laundry list of consequences.....

1. Banned from the All Star Game and any future NBA events.
2. Fired from your job as Chief Basketball Operations Advisor for the CBA's Indiana Alley Cats.
3. Dropped as a spokesman for Bald Guyz. (Who knew? Bald Guyz CEO Howard Brauner said the company “does not discriminate based on lifestyle choice, color, education, financial resources, religion, physical capabilities or in any other way.”)
4. Ridiculed on blogs and on YouTube
5. Bring Rony Seikaly back from the dead.
6. Have TimHardaway.com removed.
6. Have your Carwash renamed, but still get phone calls to the place asking about the incident.

Is Tim Hardaway's House of Wings the next causality? Seriously Timmy.....gay people are pretty creative. You might want to have one do some work on your homepage.


















In all seriousness I can't understand something. This is a BIG deal don't get me wrong, but why is this such a spectacle and racist remarks usually aren't? I mean Michael Irvin said some pretty f'ed up things about Tony Romo, Nick Saban used the word Coon-ass, Anita Marks called an NFL Player a Monkey, and even Smash walked out of practice after Asst Coach MacGill said black players were "Junk Yard Dogs". Most of these barely caused a blip on the radar screen of National News.

Just seems like to me we should focus on fixing ALL bigotry.....not just certain kinds.

Not much Announcing News today I feel asleep listening to Steve Bardo wax-ecstatic about some Saint Marys player named Tron (same guy Bill Simmons flipped out about when he covered SM earlier in the year) . Steve could be good one day......he just needs to stop stating the obvious so much. I also fell asleep before Tiki came on Leno....but to tell you the truth....I'm sick of him already.

I'm really here to bring you much more important news. The Gilbert Arenas Trampoline dunk was actually done on a bet from Shaq.

We were sitting there in the timeout watching them Elvis guys dunk, and my big mouth, I was like, “Man, I can do that better than them.” And then they missed a couple so I was like, “When they finish up, I’m going to go do it.”

Shaq was like, “Yeah, right.” He said, “I’ll put $100,000 in your foundation.”

I was like, $100,000 or get in trouble by David Stern?

$100,000 or get in trouble by David Stern?

Oh man, I’ll take that fine. So I did it for my Zer0 2 Her0 charity.

It was great though. Between the legs…Yea-ahhh!

I used to practice those trampoline dunks back at Golden State. I can flip and everything. But I didn’t want to flip and crack my neck.

Well okay.....$100K is worth it for the kids, but if you had gotten hurt Gilbert....I would have been pissed. That would have ruined my NBA Season, and after the past NFL season you're all I've got (well you and Grevis Vasquez). Now that we're in the second half let's calm down a tad, and focus on the game. Thanks.

P.S.- The fact that you PRACTICED tramp dunks at Golden State is just weird, but I'm not surprised.

P.P.S.- I have no good reason why I just wrote those last few sentences to Gilbert. I'm not going back and changing it now though.

P.P.P.S.- Is it Elvises or Elvisi?

Gil Arenas Blog (NBA.com)

The Video (700 Level)

My Swag Was Phenomenal (JCMJ)

This is the funniest thing I've seen in quite sometime. From Youtube.....

In an unprecedented running duel, we've pitted Ohio State against the University of Florida. For one month they ran, and in the end Ohio State's total miles fell short. Now they've got to face the consequence. Watch what happens when the Gator mascot appears on the OSU campus.



The guy who drops the elbow is going to be a State Senator Someday.

It amazed me that I didn't spend one second this weekend over at ESPN.com (I may be weening myself from it finally), so I decided to head over there today from some Post ASG coverage. I was mainly interesting in checking out True Hoop's first post on the site, to see if Simmons' announcing article was up yet (it's not), and to read the comments from the Michael Irvin Story.

Well I noticed one of those stupid SportsNation Polls in the bottom corner with the following question: What was the most exciting sporting event over the weekend?

Your Choices:

The Daytona 500- Not a chance in hell. I'm already sick of NASCAR on ESPN.....it was on the front page today when went to the site.
The NBA All-Star Game- Nope. Pretty damn boring....read the live-blog if you don't believe me.
The Dunk Contest- Nah....Good but not great.
The Nissan Open- I won't even dignify that with a response.
The Barkley-Dick Bavetta Race- But of course! You knew I was checking this one.

So what are the results?



If you can't read that......that's 37% for Barkley Bavetta. 1% higher than the Daytona 500 (Green=Barkely Race, Yellow=500). I'm thinking to myself.....way to go ESPNers! Way not to fall into the NASCAR trap. And then I saw this on the Michael Irvin article........



First......my site's mentioned on ESPN.com, which gives me all sorts of different emotions. Second.....How the hell would they let that comment even stay up on the site after some of the things I've said about their announcers? As of current check it's still on there. Oh well.....way to go AA'ers.

Within the past few weeks I've gone to under #20,000 on Technorati, I've sold 10 Free Harold! Shirts, been on Sports Bloggers Live, had the most watched sports video watched on You Tube. And now people are mentioning AA on ESPN.com? Crazy, crazy stuff. Thanks to all of you for making this a hell of a month.

Enough of the ass-kissing.....back to your regularly scheduled loathing.

So lost in all the hoopla this past weekend (I mean how can you top a 67 year old white man and 43 year old large black man kissing) was Michael Irvin actually being kicked to the curb by ESPN. Irvin seemed neither upset or bitter about the situation when reached for comment yesterday.....

ESPN "was great for me and I want to thank all of them for the opportunity." Irvin was in the film The Longest Yard and is interested in doing more acting: "When you work for ESPN, there are certain things you can't do.....I'd still love to talk football on TV, but also want to have leeway."

I guess the biggest problem I have with this is the timing. Why wait until now? Doesn't make much sense. I forgot the commenter who said this, but he/she mentioned that ESPN would be idiots for firing him for next season because he's going into the Hall. Great point......makes no sense. You know what makes even less sense though?

Logical additions to ESPN NFL studio shows include recently retired coach Bill Parcells, who has already worked at ESPN, and Emmitt Smith, who had a recent tryout at ESPN and last season worked on the NFL Network.

Please do not replace Irvin with Emmitt.....please. I thought Emmitt was horrible during the National Championship game. And Bill Parcells? Could you get someone with less personality??? I guess they are trying to get as far away from Irvin as possible with the new hires.




















Irvin Out (USA Today)
Maybe You're Crazy (Leave the Man Alone)
Michael Irvin out at ESPN

Okay.....I said I'd do this, so I'm going to finish this out. The roommate and Awful GF have both gone to bed. It's just me and a bottle of Chianti.....let's get hammered folks. It'll be President's Day in about an hour!

Marv gets rejected from the Parker-Longoria wedding.....is he really missing out? McGrady pulls out a hell of a cross-over but bricks the jumper. MEHMET! Did I just see Peter John Ramos out there? What's with these teams???

Garnett is warming up, and the West may win this by 50.

Shaq tries a little crossover on my boy Okur and he bricks a college three. You can't cross up Turkey! Recognize tru game!!!

The East has gone on a little run and it's 129-102 West. At least they've cut it under 30.

"Barkley and Bavetta Kissed on the lips"- Tracy McGrady
"Nah....I don't believe it. Show me the footage"- Shaq
"Where you been?!?!?!"- TMc

West has 47 assists in the game which breaks the record set in an overtime game previously. More dunks.....more dunks.....Kobe and Marion. Ray Allen apparently has forgotten how to dribble entirely.

Just learned that Doug Collins has a vote for MVP......I've got $500 he bets for Jordan. Oh damn! Stoudamire with a sick no look pass to Anthony for the jam.....good stuff. Lebron hits a three.

Grimey said...The East needs the And 1 Mix Tape Tour to teach them how to play defense.

Head Chick said...This game is worse than the celebrity game. No more NBA in Vegas. +1 Gambling and Hangovers.

+100 To both of you for staying up and watching this with me. 140-117 West.....the over is already achieved with 4 minutes to go.

Rip Hamilton has a hurt finger and won't be back in the game.......that's a shame I was hoping for someone to run around off weak picks and a ton of jumpers.

"What you got on tonight?"- KG
"It's Coochie"- Craig Sager
"Cooochie? Umm okay."- KG

Ha.....Gilbert Arenas joined a bunch of Elvis superstars dunking of trampolines during a timeout. Eddie Jordan.....seriously......you need to not let that shit happen.

Head Chick said...i'm sooooo mad i skipped family guy and american dad for this (desperate housewives was saving on the dvr). They were doing "black mystery month" on american dad.

Black Mystery Month???? I'm not going anywhere near that one.

143-123......3 mins or so left.

TNT Throws up a graphic on the MVP candidates.....

Melo 18/8
Stoudemire 23
Marion 18/9
KOBE..................29/4/6

Who the hell do you think is winning?!?!?!

Damn.......Melo with a hell of a follow-up. One-handed.

"Doug will you sign my wingtip"- Steve Kerr, after Ray Allen was showing all the signatures on his shoe.

One Minute Left....

Head Chick said...AA, you are drunk. He said "Pucci", "Brioni and Pucci." There's a reason why I do the fashion round up....

Touche'.....touche'

KOBE! KOBE! KOBE!........this isn't like Philly as Kobe gets some love from the fans.

153-132 Your Final.

What a great game. I've never seen so many amazing players and plays during one game. The passing and point guard play was superb. And the defense.....well the defense was......

Forget it....this game was horrible. Well, it wasn't that bad, but it wasn't good. Thank you all for stopping by, and I'll see you tomorrow with the usual.

Cheers,
AA

Wayne and I say goodnight........GOODNIGHT!