This whole Emmitt Smith as a rogue reporter, for various networks, is highly entertaining. He was last seen talking about tailgating on FOX Sports, but this Friday he's heading to the big time. Emmitt will be taking both the Today Show's, Matt Lauer and Al Roker, on a tour of the Cowboys' new stadium!

Not only will Emmitt be your tour guide this Friday, but Lauer will be interviewing Jerry Jones, and Roker will be hanging with the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders. The unintentional comedy of this event could be off the charts.

Emmitt Smith has traded his live Monday Night Football appearances on ESPN, for taped ones on FOX Sports, but he's still bringing the goods. In this clip he talks about the awesomeness of tailgating at the new Cowboys' stadium, and the wonders of the other white meat....PORK! Via NESW Sports....

"For fans that are going to the ball game, they have an opportunity now to tailgate at a brand new stadium and smoke it up and saranate the whole stadium itself. To me tailgating is a part of gameday experience. And what we found is that 42% of the people prefer pork over the other meat. And at tailgate parties I can understand why because pork is easy, easy to cook, its simple and it's affordable, and so going to gameday stadium, look for everyone out there to be tailgatin. To be using some type of pork meat on their grills."- Emmitt Smith

Ah yes....Smoke it up and seranatin' at Gameday Stadium! I've missed you Emmitt.

Great News! Emmitt Smith Is Still Talking! (NESW Sports)

You knew the day was coming, but how could you prepare for it? Over the past few years, Emmitt Smith has stuttered, stumbled and made up words, for various programs on ESPN, but next season....that will be no more. ESPN hasn't made an official statement yet, but Pro Football Talk has gotten word from the inside, that Smith has been officially "blowed out" by the "Leader"....

After a two-season run featuring multiple new on-air additions to the English language, the greatest running back in NFL history ultimately has fared no better than Joe Montana as a broadcaster.

Yes, ESPN has advised us that Emmitt’s relationship with the network has ended.

There will be no formal announcement — and presumably no going away party. Or vodka-fueled roast.

“We thank Emmitt for his contributions to ESPN and work ethic the past two years,” ESPN spokesman Bill Hofheimer told us via e-mail. “We wish him all the best.”

Such a sad, sad day. I know that there are times when I wish people weren't on air, but there are some people that you pray stay on just for comedy's sake. Emmitt was one of those people, and I don't know what I'm going to do during Monday Night Football without him. As a tribute to Emmitt, I give you a countdown of my favorite Emmittisms, and the quintessential compilation video of his work. Godspeed my friend, and I hope you find the rites of patches you deserve!

AA's Top Ten Emmittisms:

Honorable Mentions:

"Not only does he have the NFC East record for touchdowns, but also the team record."
"Wes Worker is a possession receiver that make things happen."
"The NFC West is probably one of the weakest conferences in the whole NFC."
"The leadership definitely have to come from the leaders."
"I think it's his self-confidence in himself that make him so confident when it get down into the crunch time."

10. "Last year there was a lot of things the Colts had to address. They couldn't stop the run, and all those. That was one of the biggest things they had to address."
9. "You have to have the personality to match up with the Patriots."
8. "He's giving them all the confidences they need. He giving them the confidence that he need."
7. "They do a very good job of flying around the Football field and carousing the Football carrier."
6. "Don't worry about the game you just won or the team that we just blew out. Uhhh... blown. Blown out. Let's think about what we need to do going forward, and they had blown out."
5. "Eli Manning has been given the rites of patches."
4. "This kind of inconsistency, against a team like New England, will get you completely blowed out."
3. "You cannot change the stripes of a leopard."
2. "Go to Arizona, sharp as a whistle, and do some finishing touches, so we can go down in the Super Bowl and play our best football of the whole entire season."
1. "The strength of the Patriots, their offense, got debacled."



Emmitt Exits ESPN (PFT)
The Emmitt Smith Anthology (Walter Football)

Emmitt Smith made it through a night of coverage without saying anything too crazy, but with Donovan on the stage following the game, the four-man set decided to give us a new Emmittism. It wasn't spoken word, as most Emmittisms are, but rather a pose that everyone decided to break out during the postgame interview. I give you the Emmitt "Cool Pose"!

I always thought that was the Emmitt "I'm going to look at you like you're saying something crazy, even though I have no idea what the fuck I'm talking about" pose. So yeah....thanks for clarifying, Stu!

Man, it's been a good while since we've had a great Emmitt quote. Well I finally have one to add to his laundry list of crimes against the English language. Here is Smith trying to use the phrase "rite of passage" when describing Matt Cassel's leadership....

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As soon as he tried to break out that Cassel is, "stuck between a rock and hard place," I knew that one was going downhill. Thanks for that Emmitt....it's great to have you back.