Best of the Worst

Tuesday, October 31, 2006

So last night was yet another maddening trek into double speak land. Joe Theismann just destroys my will to live sometimes and apparently Tony Kornheiser is the most unfunny person alive after 7pm. It's like he's some sort of pseudo-Gremlin......feed him after PTI and he turns into Bob Hope and his bad jokes just continue to multiply.

Anywho, here are my favorite quotes from last night. Our NBA Announcing preview will be up later today, and as a hint to how awesome it will be.......By my count ESPN/ABC will have a total of 31 personalities covering games in-person or in-studio this season. That's right 31!!!

Onto the Announcing last night:

"Ryan Longwell will kick it and that's one of the story lines for tonight."- MT, Funny Mike because you didn't even mention him the entire night.

"We don't know Tom Brady the way we know Peyton, Vick, or McNabb"- TK, This didn't make me mad it just made me laugh. Tom Brady has been disrespected for too long!!! ESPN didn't show the graphic that he has the most wins and the most rings this era. He's never hosted SNL. He was never SI's Sportsman of the Year. He wasn't animated in both The Simpsons and Family Guy. AND! we don't know that Tom Brady is a playboy and dates Hollywood Actresses......nope......I wasn't aware of that at all.

Tony K then explained his previous comment about Brady by saying that he meant he "wasn't in a lot of commercials", Nope he was never in a VISA commercial with his entire offensive line. (Okay I'll stop now. I think you get the point.)

"Brady slid from side to side like he was playing on clay at the French Open"- TK, Your core audience DOES NOT watch Tennis Tony.....I'm sorry.

"Minnesota plays for the Little Brown Jug"- MT, to Tony K. after Tony brought up Paul Bunyan's Axe. Tirico's research team fails him again. Tony was astute enough to comment on the clip playing (god forbid) of Maroney's 250+ yard game versus Wisconsin. Tirico just stomped all over the brief insight.

"I'm convinced Bill has an endorsement deal with Homeless Shelters"- TK, Yes Tony....making fun of homeless people is hilarious. Like I said last night.....should have got it out of your system in New Orleans asshat.

"They are using the play action because Chester Taylor has run the ball well"- JT, Just an asinine comment. Taylor had 9 carries for 20 yards at that point.

"You have to go out and get a Quarterback you can have for ten years"- JT
"Brad Johnson is seeking an extension and I think he deserves the money."- 1st quarter Joe Theismann
No matter the time....No matter the place.....Joe will contradict himself!

"I see glitter on Tom Brady's shirt and I think I'm falling in Love"- TK
"Mercifully Week 8 of the NFL season is over."- MT
Couldn't have said it better myself Mike.

Another MNF game in the books and another complete verbal crapfest. Back later with the NBA Previews! While some people predict the Bulls winning the Championship.....I predict the asses that will predict that the Bulls will win the Championship (er, something like that).

Posted by Awful Announcing- at 9:50 AM


It is unconscionable that those clowns were trying to claim Tom Brady was not famous last night. A traveshamockery if you ask me.

TJ said...
Oct 31, 2006, 1:26:00 PM  

The "Brady isn't famous/frivolous" stuff was great because it was so stupid. Here's the thing--I'm sort of an odd duck. So taped to my wall are two very manly pictures of Tom Brady from a GAP ad. I bought my wife the issue of (GQ? Esquire? OK, I'm not so odd that I know for sure which it is) with Brady on the cover, and I've still got all the photos that we clipped out of it. Manning is in some freaking commercials, but Brady is on the cover of fashion mags. But he's not famous and all he cares about is football.

Pacifist Viking said...
Oct 31, 2006, 1:33:00 PM  

At the 5:20pm "update" of the Monday Night Football game yesterday, Sal Palontonio said the following

"The last time we saw the Vikings was on the debut of Monday Night Football on ESPN, when they shocked the world and beat the Redskins at FedEx Field."


I was catatonic for 3 hours afterward.

Oct 31, 2006, 7:36:00 PM  

I was trying to figure out why you included a picture from Cannonball Run II in that post, when I realized that's Joe Theismann in betweent the hot Lamborghini chicks. I forgot he was in the second one.

Chip Wesley said...
Nov 1, 2006, 6:13:00 PM  

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