Trudging Through the Outback

Friday, July 28, 2006

So I know I promised all 7 of you a review of one of the American Sportscasters Online Interviews, but I might not get to it. And this is only because I'm still reeling from my first viewing of the "New and Improved" Baseball Tonight.

Baseball is already a sport of cliches (as most sports are), but to hear them over and over and over and over and over and over again describing a hitter is just mind numbingly maddening. Now I'm pretty sure they are just trying out lineups (for some reason John Kruk was absent last night- maybe he was fired too), but a lineup of Ravech, Moral Orel, and Tino is NOT going to work.

I could only force my eyes and ears open long enough to watch through two segments, but this is what I got:

Segment 2: This actually came later in my viewing, but Segment 1 was so ridiculous I had to build the suspense. Coming back from commercial Ravey gets on the horn with the most random collection of people ever to talk about the trade deadline.

Side Note: I know I have readers in Chicago and Minnesota, so if you know these guys please tell me who the hell they are.

Our guests were Bruce Levine (who I can't find in Wikipedia, presumably from Chicago), La Velle Neal (who I can't find in Wikipedia, presumably from Minnesota), and some guy named Dan Graziano (whose nickname is probably Rocky, but I couldn't find in Wikipedia). I'm pretty sure they are all writers though. (My thinking at the time......Greaaaaat this should go Flawlessly.)

Well they are talking about the AL Central and who's going to trade for whom, but I couldn't even make out what they were talking about. The cell connections were so bad that all I could understand was (Cusssshshshshss) Liriano (cuuussusssshshhh) Soriano (cuuususuhhhhh) trade (cusushshsshshh) Playoffs.

And after all of that Karl Ravech had the nerve to ask them who they thought was getting the Wild Card!!! As if they were going to say any team but the one they write for.

Open Letter to ESPN: Can we please stop this joke of a process whereas the host of a show knows nothing but East Coast sports and finds it necessary to call up a jackass beat reporter on a bat phone? I completely blame Colin Cowherd, and he will get his due on this site, but you didn't have to copy the process......LET ALONE HIRE THE ASS!!! Thank you for your time, Awful Announcing P.S.- I miss you Harold.......XOXOXOXO

Segment 1: Below are two quotes from our fabulous new color guys Orel and Tino.

Describing Jesse Barfield...."This kid has Quick Hips.......Quiiiiiick Hips. Most of that is genetics"- Orel

Now I know who Jesse's dad is, but do you really think the kid wants his hips compared to those of his dad? Let alone have Orel drag out the second Quiiiiiiick when describing his body. And Orel....umm....muscle reaction is not passed down through genes.

Describing Chase Utley...."Quick hands inside.....Goes short to long with good extension.....quick inside"- Tino

Okay...(looking past how overtly gay these comments are) the funny thing about this was watching/listening to Tino struggle trying to tell this in time with Utley's swing on screen. He struggled so badly that he didn't even say the kid's name....he just went right into the quote above and then was done talking. Ravech had to swoop in behind and cleanup because there was just dead air.

So Gentlemen and Lady (although I think there are three of you that read) I introduce you to your new and improved Baseball Tonight.....

Posted by Awful Announcing- at 10:22 AM

11 Comments:

I heard Tino on 1050 ESPN Radio with Micheal Kay last night on the drive home and it is exasperating the amount ESPN hypes every Thursday night when he comes on the radio as a special guest.
Some people can make the transition between jobs easily, other fail miserably. Tino has failed miserably.
I love Bam-Tino, always have and always will. However, he sucks on the air.
He has a bigger stuttering problem than Walton did back in the day, and has the vocabulary of a six-year old. What ever happened to just finding a good announcer who studied communications from Syracuse or something, and knows a lot about baseball. If these people are not in high demand at the moment at ESPN, then they are just waitnig for OLN to take over.

Jamie said...
Jul 28, 2006, 11:44:00 AM  

For what it's worth, Bruce LeVine is a beat reporter for ESPN Radio's affiliate in Chicago, WMVP (AM 1000). Ostensibly he covers the Cubs and White Sox forthe station, but in reality he reports far, far more frequently about the White Sox (the station is very Sox friendly, and broadcasts the Sox games).

Travis G. said...
Jul 28, 2006, 11:55:00 AM  

Thanks Travis....I figured as much. He was all over the WSox jock.

AwfulAnnouncing said...
Jul 28, 2006, 12:02:00 PM  

I'm with Jamie on this one: stop it with the former ballplayers ESPN. Orel could maybe be the 3rd guy in the booth calling a game, given how much he knows about pitching, but no more than that. Tino should never be allowed near a microphone, I can't believe how bad he is.

Remember Baseball Tonight with Ravech, Reynolds & Gammons? That was an entertaining and insightful show to watch, and it's sad we probably won't see that team together again.

Also, some nitpicking that no one cares about: WMVP doesn't broadcast White Sox games anymore, WSCR has the rights now. And though Bruce Levine is beat reporter for WMVP, I'd say he's most well known for hosting, along with Sox broadcaster John Rooney, the best sports radio show in Chicago: Talking Baseball.

the good doctor said...
Jul 28, 2006, 12:17:00 PM  

La Velle is the beat guy for the Minneapolis Star-Tribune. He seems like a pretty decent guy overall, I know he posts comments for sure at aarongleeman.com (a Twins blog).

I was at a sports bar last night and noticed they had him on the show, too bad it wasn't better quality.

Oh, and as for the lineup, they might have given Krukker the night off since the "good" teams weren't in action. Just a guess.

Alex said...
Jul 28, 2006, 12:20:00 PM  

I got a question. Who's worse-

Tino Martinez from Baseball Tonight

or

B.J. Armstrong from NBA Shootaround?

Jamie said...
Jul 28, 2006, 1:22:00 PM  

Tough one....I'd go with Tino because I'm pissed about the Harold Reynolds thing, but that would be a biased decision.

I say the both should be set on fire.

AwfulAnnouncing said...
Jul 28, 2006, 1:31:00 PM  

i do like orel's insights about pitchers, but he definitely has little to offer about hitters. unfortunately, you can also see him slowly morphing into the kruk/phillips level of inane comments just to be heard. once they removed gammons, you could see harold succumbing to the same (lack of) thought processes.

Anonymous said...
Jul 28, 2006, 1:40:00 PM  

You think we can convince Harold and Gammons to team up and do some primetime baseball show on Spike TV or something...

Cuz if I have to watch Tino one more time I'm gonna drown myself in the bathtub...

Jul 28, 2006, 2:40:00 PM  

That would be nice Jack Morris.

I really hope OLN/Versus starts doing more sports other than hockey.

Tampa Sports said...
Jul 28, 2006, 6:31:00 PM  

*sigh* I'm glad I didn't watch. Way to take one for the team, Awful Announcing!

Here's hoping they get Harold Reynolds over on Fox Sports Net. They could sure use him, and I don't just mean on The Worst Damn "Sports" Show Period.

Nyssa23 said...
Jul 28, 2006, 7:47:00 PM  

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