Game One: Michigan State vs. North Carolina
Location: Ford Field, Detroit
Start Time: 9:21PM EST (CBS)
Network and Announcers: Jim Nantz, Clark Kellogg
Favorite: UNC (-8)

Game One: Michigan State vs. Connecticut
Location: Ford Field, Detroit
Start Time: 6:07PM EST (CBS)
Network and Announcers: Jim Nantz, Clark Kellogg
Favorite: UConn (-5)

Game Two: Villanova vs. North Carolina
Location: Ford Field, Detroit
Start Time: 8:47PM EST (CBS)
Network and Announcers: Jim Nantz, Clark Kellogg
Favorite: UNC (-7)

John McEnroe has been brought on by ESPN as analyst, but the outspoken one will be making an appearance on CBS this Saturday. McEnroe will be hoping on, between games one and two of the Final Four, to try to get people more in the know about Prostate Cancer....

The Final Four on CBS this Saturday will be interrupted by John McEnroe. The three-time Wimbledon and four-time US Open Champion, who recently turned 50, will be serving up a bit of humor for the 50 year-olds watching the Final Four on CBS this Saturday. Mac, alongside 50 year-old hoopsters Kelly Tripucka and Rick Mahorn, will appear in a vignette that will ONLY air one-time encouraging men to visit www.50over50challenge.com and get serious about their prostate health (specifically enlarging prostate).

I guess if you're going to break into one of the best Basketball days of the year, it should definitely be for something this important. Be sure to check out the site at 50 Over 50 Challenge, and get those prostates checked, boys!

Update: Well now you don't even have to wait until Saturday. Here's the spot for your perusal....

Last week, I told you all that Jim Nantz was going to be on the Price Is Right giving away a trip to the Final Four, and today was the day! The first contestant in "Showcase Showdown" passed on a trip to Hawaii and a fish tank, and then was hit with the news. The news that she would get her showcase straight from "Hello Friends", himself.

Nantz appeared live from the University of Connecticut (for reasons beyond me), and after the bidding and revealing was done, unfortunately (or fortunately) the trip stayed on the shelf....

Silly girl! If she had only added in the thousands of dollars worth of fees from the ticket company, she woulda had that junks! Good work by Jim Nantz though. I even loved how he worked in the name of that creepy student in the suit behind him. Such a pro!

Not only was there news recently that one James William Nantz, III could run for office in the near future, but today we've learned that more importantly (kidding) Nantz will be appearing on the Price Is Right! Not only that, but one of the showcase prizes will be a trip to the Final Four!!! From Fang's Bites via CBS PR....

CBS Sportscaster Jim Nantz, the 2008 National Sportscaster of the Year, will make a special appearance on CBS's Emmy Award-winning THE PRICE IS RIGHT, with host Drew Carey, Thursday, April 2 (11:00 AM-12:00 Noon, ET; 10:00-11:00 AM, PT), on the CBS Television Network. Nantz, who pre-taped his appearance earlier this month, will introduce a special Showcase trip to the NCAA Final Four in Detroit.

Well that was the shortest press release/blockquote in the history of the Internet. It still should be fun. I would also encourage Nantz to wear some kind of "I Love You Drew!" homemade t-shirt of some sort. Preferably bedazzled.

Jim Nantz! Come On Down! You're the Next Presenter on The Price is Right! (Fang's Bites)

So I hit you with the ESPN/ABC NBA preview earlier today, and if you were paying close attention you probably noticed that Greg Anthony is no longer with ESPN. The Basketball analyst has jumped ship over to CBS, and will be replacing Clark Kellogg on the studio team. Kellogg, who recently moved to Billy Packer's empty analyst position after his departure from the network, will of course be paired with Jim Nantz for the 2008-2009 College Basketball Season. That will then make your studio team consist of Greg Gumbel, Seth Davis and Anthony.

The network will tip-off coverage with Memphis at Georgetown on December 13th, and will also carry action from five Conference Championships (MVC, Big Ten, SEC, Pac-10 and Conference USA). Other important dates to mark on your calendar are as follows:

March 15, 2009- NCAA Tournament Selection Show
Thursday, March 19, 2009- First-round Tournament action begins
Saturday, April 4- The Final Four
Monday, April 6, 2009- ThChampionship Game

Here's your entire game schedule for '08-'09 on CBS....

Sat., Dec. 13

Memphis at Georgetown (2pm)
Indiana at Kentucky (4pm)

Sat., Dec. 20

Duke - Xavier (2pm, From New Jersey)*
Michigan State-Texas (2pm, From Houston)*
Connecticut at Gonzaga (4pm)*
Purdue - Davidson (4pm, From Indy)*

Sat., Dec. 27

West Virginia at Ohio State (4pm)

Sat., Jan. 3

North Carolina at Florida (4pm)

Sun., Jan. 4

Kentucky at Louisville (4:30pm)

Sat., Jan. 10

Kansas at Michigan State (1pm)

Sun., Jan. 11

Wisconsin at Purdue (1:30pm)

Sat., Jan. 17

Georgetown at Duke (1:30pm)
Arizona State at UCLA (3:45pm)

Sat., Jan. 24

Memphis at Tennessee (3:30pm)

Sun., Jan. 25

Florida at Vandy (1:30pm)
Michigan State at Ohio State (3:45)

Sat., Jan. 31

Michigan at Purdue (1pm)*
Washington State at Arizona (1pm)*

Sat., Feb. 7

Notre Dame at UCLA (1pm)*
Ole Miss at Vandy (1pm)*

Sun., Feb. 8

Purdue at Illinois (1pm)

Sat., Feb. 14

UCLA at Arizona (1pm)*
Kentucky at Arkansas (1pm)*

Sun., Feb. 15

Illinois at Indiana (1pm)

Sat., Feb. 21

Tennessee at Kentucky (1pm)*
Army at Navy (1pm)*

Sun., Feb. 22

Indiana at Purdue (1pm)*
Wisconsin at Michigan State (1pm)*
Illinois at Ohio State (1pm)*
Villanova at Syracuse (1pm)*

Sat., Feb. 28

Georgia Tech at North Carolina (Noon)
Notre Dame at Connecticut (2pm)
LSU at Kentucky (4pm)

*- Regional Coverage

Yep. Jim Nantz doesn't prepare these things ahead of time at all. With that established I thought that Nantzy did a pretty great job tonight. During the Chalmers three he finally showed raw emotion and let himself go. It only took an overtime game in the National Championship but it still happened. My advice to you Jim, remember that feeling and try to relive it.

Billy Packer is another subject that I'll delve into tomorrow morning. Until then, enjoy your ultra extended highlight edition of the final moments of the 2008 National Championship......

If you have any thoughts on Nantz and Packer leave them in the comments and I'll be sure to credit you in the review coming later today. Great game.

Kansas vs. Memphis
9:21 PM ET, April 7, 2008
Alamodome, San Antonio, TX (CBS)
Announcers: Jim Nantz and Bill Packer
Spread: Memphis -2, O/U 148

The Championship is finally upon us after a month of madness, and this matchup should be great one. Both teams love to run and this game could ultimately get up into the 80s if each team's stars are on their game tonight. Should be fun. I'll see you around 9pm tonight for the open thread. Feel free to leave your predictions and thoughts in the comments below.

AA's Picks- Memphis -2, MVP: CDR, Final Score: Memphis 78-Kansas 72
______________________________

While you're waiting for the game to start feel free to create a caption for the Photo of the Day......


Picks via Anon....

John Clayton-Memphis
John Kruk-Memphis
J.A. Adande-Kansas
Buster Olney-Memphis
Hubert Davis-Kansas
Dick Vitale-Memphis
Bob Knight-Memphis
Digger Phelps-Memphis
Jay Bilas-Kansas

Strange exchange on the ESPN pregame show. They're talking about defense, so Knight starts waxing poetic about defending the Alamo, and he wraps up by saying, "They played 13 days of defense; they only need 40 minutes." (Via WM)

Thank god Larry Brown is there. We needed another Coach to talk about....well coaching.

"I've written all kinds of stuff that I posted in the locker room."- Bob Knight

Hahaha....that's too funny.

"Can I play for you?"- Dick Vitale
"No."- Bob Knight

"Can we get back in this century please?!"- Jay Bilas

"I think will decide it is what you have on card number 732 here, and that's protecting the ball."- Jay Bilas

Man he is testy today.

"My game changer is going to be defense."- Bob Knight

Ummm....it was supposed to be a person, but okay. Wow and Shelley Smith just completely botched that live piece. Hilarious.

"A confluence of dreams and hopes and ultimately a Championship!"- Jim Nantz

Yeah that wasn't prepared at all. Hello friends!

At least they played the National Anthem...20 minutes before tip-off and during Two And A Half Men. (Via Anon)

Gotta love it and the CBS Studio Team is still in NYC. Good move CBS.

"They've been salivating all Tournament long and Pavlov just rang the bell again."- Greg Gumbel on Davis and Kellogg

Sam Ryan is just downright gorgeous. So the WKU buzzer beater was the Pontiac game changing performance and it got them a $100K contract. Being a Pontiac owner I can safely say that they could have afforded more.

Oooh I like the signatures during the player introductions. Nice touch CBS.


Here we go.....Memphis gets the tip and Dorsey hits the first shot of the game and then Rush gets blasted by Anderson. Good foul though as Rush hits one out of two.

Having Nantz announce the lineups is one of the dumbest ideas I've ever seen. It all but kills any excitement for the game. (Via Anon)

Agreed. It would probably be cool with any other announcer though. Well besides Joe Buck. Rose....and one. 9-3 Memphis early. Hi Shelley Smith! Are you ready for your spotlight???

And that's our first TV Timeout. Pretty crazy pace in the early going. Memphis with the "Dolly Parton" early. Shaka Kaun....Shaka Kaun, Shaka Kaun, Shaka Kaun....on the oop.

Why in the holy hell is Ed Hightower officiating the national title game? (Via Matt)

That's a good question. I think the NCAAs have a system where the top rated officials in each round go on to the next. I could be wrong though. CDR hits a circus shot and Memphis is back up by two. Taggart picks up two quick fouls and he's heading back to the bench. We're tied again at the under 12.

"Memphis, with the big lead of 6, but we're tied."- Jim Nantz (Via Andrew)

"He gave him a little lingo."- Billy Packer after Dorsey's dunk

Dozier hits a three after another Kansas run and the KU lead is 3 at the under eight TV timeout. Intense game.

"They said it was impossible for all four number one seeds to make the Final Four but they also said it was impossible to get real Coke taste and zero calories."- Jim Nantz

Roy Williams is a traitor (Traitor! Traitor!) and wearing a KU button. And CDR hits a three to give Memphis the lead again after an amazing Dorsey block. Collins hits a tough floater and we're tied again. Dorsey is arguing a call and just gave up on defense there. Not a heady play. 5 minutes left.

CDR again! He's got thirteen and we're tied....again.

Roy Williams is like the guy who gets married but keeps showing up at his ex-girlfriend's workplace. (Via Thermocaster)

"Where is Derek Rose?"- Jim Nantz

Good point. He hasn't taken a shot in forever and has about four turnovers at this point. 3 point Kansas lead with 1:43 to go. Really bad offensive set by Memphis at the end of the half and they're down 5 at the half.

33-28. So much for the high scoring affair that I predicted.

And we're baaaaack! Band shot....drink. Memphis gets the ball to start the 2nd half. And just like that we're tied.

"He's like the quiet assassin."- Billy Packer

As opposed to the loud one? Also, can someone explain to me what Joey Dorsey is doing? He's playing like an idiot right now. Kansas by one at the under 16 TV timeout. Crazy start to the half.

You know, for everything else wrong about him, Billy Packer really does do a great job of quickly getting away from the different promos that Nantz reads, which all too often Nantz seems to be too excited about. (Via Willmott)

I agree but he's also not calling out Joey Dorsey for acting like a g'damn idiot this game. Everyone can see he's loafing and pouting every play and they haven't mentioned it once.

"I'm going to start giving some credit to the Kansas defenders."- Billy Packer

Yeah they're holding Rose to nothing....you think you should? Rush looks good and should probably be getting more touches. Kansas breaks out the Box and 1 and Packer is all over it.....about three trips down the floor too late.

"Both coaches met their wives in, of all places, Lawrence, Kansas."- Jim Nantz (Via Mal)

Wow. Way to just insult every Kansan in one comment. Also, here's your turning point. Kansas decides to switch to the box and one with 8 minutes left, leaving Memphis with the open threes they haven't seen all game. Tigers up two.

Rose is heating up....forget that. He's heated. 12, 5, and 7 right now.

Kansas is shooting 3's tonight about as good as Chuck shoots tiny hoops. Chuck - he's such an idiot. (Via Mal)

Hahahaha....now that's funny.

"He's so much more effective with no screens."- Billy Packer as Rose bricks a shot

Okay, Billy I take it back. In the open court Rose drives and gets the and one on a circus shot. The kid is taking over.

Memphis really does have the ugliest band in America. I need some eye bleach and a picture of the UCLA cheerleaders after seeing that group. (Via Thermocaster)

I know and they only show them. Is Kansas' band not there? Hack a Memphis is in play with Kansas down seven with 2 minutes left. Dozier to the line.

"Bangs them both. Nine point bulge now."- Jim Nantz

"That's the worst shot you can take in Basketball at this time. One foot out and you've got a three."- Billy Packer

Okaaaaay. There's two minutes left and you're putting arugably the worst free throw shooting team in America on the line. Now Billy is asking for a three down six with 1:30 left. I would hate for him to be the coach of my team.

Kansas fouling technique works and after a CDR miss they cut it to two. Here we go. No fouling now.

Wow....wow. That should/could have been a technical. I never knew that it mattered who you were mad at when spiking the ball Billy Packer.

OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! OT! Super Nintendo Chalmers!!!!

Kansas is up two early on a B Rush layup and Arthur throws an oop down. They do that play about 10 times a game. An Anderson missed three and KU has this in control with 3 left.

I can't even keep up and enjoy the game so everyone just watch and we'll sort this out afterwards with videos and comments. Amazing.

"ROCK CHALK CHAMPIONSHIP!"- Jim Nantz

Dammit....can't believe I didn't think of that one!!!! Chalmers is your MOP and I'll start getting the videos up soon. Awesome end of the game.

"Rock, Chalk, Championship Jayhawks!" (Via SS Reporters)

WINNAH!

I read an interview with Jim Nantz once where said he honestly doesn't prepare his "Championship Calls" beforehand. With the NCAA Championship tonight and the Masters this weekend he's got a lot of stuff to "not prepare" for. Or has he already planned them out?

According to this quote from a CBS conference call regarding the Masters it appears that he does think them out in advance....

Nantz: I feel a tremendous amount of responsibility to put the right caption and the right story and the right description of what this means within that players heart. They have dreamt of that moment since they were a little boy and they wanted to go the Augusta and win there. And I do feel like I owe it to them to be on top of my game and be able to tell their story in an accurate fashion, to be able to reflect exactly what they are feeling at that moment. I have stories about certain players, anecdotal stuff that I've never used. I'm holding it back for the thought that one day they might win the Masters and if that moment arrives on Sunday, I'm going to tell a story that has never been told before.

Aww that's sweet. Although it makes you come across as disingenuous and not "in the moment", but whatever works for you. In related news....what do you think his call for the winner of tonight's game will be. My predictions are "And the Tigers roar all the way to the Championship!" or "We're not in Kansas anymore Toto, but Kansas IS the National Champion here in San Antonio!" I think the second one is definitely a winner....someone send that to Nantzy.

(Quote via CBS PR)

UCLA vs. Memphis (6:07pm)- Jim Nantz and Billy Packer (Spread: Memphis -2)
UNC vs. Kansas (8:47pm)- Jim Nantz and Billy Packer (Spread: UNC -4)

The Final Four is finally upon us and I'll once again be absent. I plan on making up for all the absences this Monday night though for the Open Thread to end all open threads. Until then...feel free to add your picks and our quotes in the comments and I'll piece through them tomorrow.

Enjoy the games! (Also is it weird to anyone else that the CBS team is New York still? Odd. Oh well.)

Picks:

Jay- UCLA and Kansas
Hubert- Memphis and UNC
Dick- UCLA and UNC
Bob- Memphis and UNC
Digger- Memphis and UNC
AA- Memphis and UNC

There was video last week of Kevin Love hitting full court shots with a flick of the wrist, but this version is much better. Not only does he hit the full courter with ease he also throws in a half courter and a three quarter court shot beforehand just for the hell of it.

Via GLB....

I honestly can say I've never seen someone do that so easy. If he can do that by barely trying I think he could knock someone's head off if he tried.

Fatality! Love wins.

Kevin Love nails more amazing shots from Full Court (Gutty Little Bruins)

Hooters is obviously known for using scantily clad women, but their ads aren't as racy as say Go Daddy's. Well according to the NCAA their newest ad feature a lovely lady and Dick Vitale is a no go for the Final Four program.

What was so racy? You tell me...


Umm okay? If say Dick Vitale was holding "The Rock" over his junk with two hands and staring at the girl's breasts then maybe I'd understand. So what's the actual problem then?

"My understanding is the NCAA had stated they would only consider the ad if we removed the image of a Hooters Girl, which is absurd. That would be like telling General Motors you can advertise but don't show a picture of a car," stated Mike McNeil the Vice President of Marketing for Hooters of America. "Sara is a beautiful, intelligent and hard working employee, and we would never consider removing her image from the ad. I am concerned by this last minute and seemingly arbitrary treatment. The basketball tournament is an important time for our business, and the fact that certain competitors of ours are allowed to advertise and we are not puts us at a competitive disadvantage," continued McNeil.

I'd have to agree with Mr. McNeil....that's pretty damn absurd. You don't really see any cleavage and all the ad really highlights are Ms. Hoot's legs. That's weak sauce NCAA.

NCAA Says No to Hooters at Final Four (PR Newswire)

Add the Final Four to ESPN's ever growing practice of having a ridiculous amount of people covering a game they aren't even airing. The network will air College Gameday from San Antonio on both Saturday and Monday, and they seem to be getting everyone involved....

ESPN will televise two editions of College GameDay: a one-hour episode Saturday, April 5 at noon previewing the National Semifinal matchups and a 90-minute Championship preview Monday, April 7 at 7:30 p.m. Both programs will originate from the SportsCenter at the Final Four set and feature Rece Davis and analysts Knight, Phelps, Vitale, Bilas, Hubert Davis, Lavin and Gottlieb.

I didn't think they made desks that big. I mean the one for Football's College Gameday is pieced together every weekend and that only sits three. Anyway, that's not all the coverage you'll be getting from the "Leader". Here's the rest....

* ESPN: Daily on-site SportsCenter reports Friday, April 4 to Monday, April 7; two episodes of College GameDay, including a 90-minute pre-Championship show at 7:30 p.m. ET; and analysis between National Semifinal games and halftime of the Championship.
* ESPNEWS: Daily segments from on-site reporters and coverage of news conferences.
* ESPN Radio: On-site shows Friday, Saturday and Monday as well as Final Four news, analysis and interviews.
* ESPN International: Live telecasts of all three Final Four matchups to 158 countries and territories.
* ESPNU: In-depth analysis and on-site reports during SportsCenterU, coverage of press conferences and two blocks of programming featuring replays of regular-season games involving teams in the Championship game.
* ESPN.com: Commentary and analysis, live chats, SportsNation polls, and on-site coverage from ESPN.com reporters.
* ESPN Classic: An eight-hour marathon of memorable NCAA Tournament semifinal games Saturday, April 5.
* ESPN Mobile TV: News, columns, video analysis and features from ESPN.com columnists.

(Via ESPN)

I saved this one for last because I'm like the rest of the nation - sick of hearing about the Gators. But really, I don't dislike the Gators as a team. It's pretty much Joakim Noah's antics that are wearing thin with me. Especially when he whines about the backlash. If he could keep the pelvic thrusting to a minimum and just play basketball, I wouldn't even mind him so much, because passionate players are what I love about college basketball.

Anyway, this team is full of great players, and most of them don't do anything untoward. So let's ignore my rampant bias and instead go for homer bias, by visiting the Gainesville Sun.

Now... maybe I'm an idiot, but why would Billy Donovan leave a national powerhouse he built with his own two foreheads in order to resurrect Kentucky? For some it would be an ego trip, but I'm assuming it would have to be two metric assloads of money that would lure BD away from the Gators. Nothing else makes sense to me.

Sadly, that's a lot of what the Sun is forced to write about in the run-up to a possible repeat championship:

Hubert Mizell: Pitino may be UF's Trump Card. Mr. Mizell is indulging in the canard that BD would not want to face his former mentor. Quote "Pitino now coaches at the University of Louisville, furious in-state rival of Big Blue. If Donovan signs to jump to Kentucky - no matter how much Billy and Rick might vow to one another to never become engaged in personal headbutting - it would unquestionably happen."

Pat Dooly says UK Circus Not Hard for Gators to Ignore. Well, not until you asked them about it, Pat.

And, operating on the bedrock principles of journalism, Pat knows you never turn down a good fart joke: Humphrey Silent, but Deadly.

And that's about it. Three articles about a team that might repeat as champs. And two of them are partially about the University of Kentucky. The Columbus Dispatch is diving for loose balls and taking charges, while the Sun trots back on defense and makes lazy passes.

This is why people start rooting for champs to lose, fellas.

---

Lest we forget that the women are playing a Final Four, too, I wanted to share this LZ Granderson article. LZ doesn't get much attention on Page 2, which I think is a blessing. He gets to write about topics we might not have thought about very hard otherwise.

Now, I'm not going to proselytize about women's basketball. I don't really enjoy watching it, either. However, I have immense respect for women who play basketball. They've dedicated themselves to a game that will most likely never earn them a dime. So it's not asking too much for us to give them respect, and, yes, love.

As LZ points out, nothing exposes how small a man can be like making fun of a big girl. Playing hoops is the only way for some of these women to find people who understand and accept them. And that makes Title IX OK in my book.

Best quote: "When me and my girls go to the club, we'll all wear high-heeled shoes and dress real cute, and if you're not man enough to approach me, then obviously you're not man enough to date me." - WNBA player Chantelle Anderson.

In the interests of full disclosure, I'll note that my wife can look me in the eye without putting heels on, so maybe LZ was preaching to the choir here. But here at AA, we try to do our part to promote respect for everyone. Except that schmuck Billy Packer.

See you next week, for more Press Buffet coverage.

I have been Extra P.

We've looked at local press coverage for UCLA already, now it's time to go to our nation's capital and examine the feature articles about the Georgetown Hoyas. The talent at the Washington Post is top-notch, with Michael Wilbon at the top of the heap, in my opinion. I am not so much a fan of Tony Kornheiser, either as a writer, or a football announcer. I just don't dig the Shecky Green act. Sally Jenkins has the year-round Hoyas beat, and does a nice job as well.

The Post requires a login for their online edition, so don't forget to use our AA login:

ID: awfulwrite@gmail.com Password: freeharold

I'd also be remiss if I didn't point out that Ted at A Price Above Bip Roberts is a hee-yoooge Hoya fan (and an alum), and is writing about them all week in his blog. He also turned in an excellent feature on the unifying power college sports have on a diverse student body at College Rule Notebook.

But now we turn to the august halls and cubicles of the Washington Post, after the jump.


The Wash Post is not usually into warm and fluffy features, but their analysis is always good.

Camille Powell starts us off with an examination of the impact some non-star players have on the Hoyas' fortunes: Can They Cut It? Key stat: "Georgetown trailed 75-65 with seven minutes left in regulation, but from that point on, the Hoyas outscored the Tar Heels by a 31-9 margin -- and Green and Hibbert, the team's top two scorers, accounted for just seven of those points."

Michael Wilbon weighs in on the possibility that JT3 might be a better coach than his dad. His argument: If he is, it's because his dad paved the way for it to happen.

Are you one of those people who wonders why black columnists talk about race a lot? Because crap like this happened in their lifetimes, and those of your parents.

Quite frankly, the Post's coverage seems to be all about having famous parents, and how one deals with it. Sally Jenkins named her article after a movie with Daniel Day-Lewis. Quote: "You get the feeling, listening to Thompson III wax on about his tutelage under Pete Carril of Princeton, that there was a time when his father couldn't tell him much of anything."

The echoes of history are very strong in the Georgetown coverage, which is an interesting contrast to the UCLA coverage by the L.A. Times. While there is no direct link to John Wooden, Lew Alcindor, or Bill Walton on this UCLA team, those banners have to loom large.

In general, it's amazing how many famous dads will be at this Final Four. Mike Conley for Ohio State; Big John Thompson, Patrick Ewing, and Doc Rivers for Gtown, Yannick Noah, Tito Horford, and Sidney Green for the Gators, and Joe Shipp temporarily leaving USC football on the back burner and rooting for his son Josh to win a basketball championship at UCLA.

Lots of Daddy issues getting played out on the hardwood tonight.

If OMDQ is going to open up the confessional regarding his appreciation for Bill Simmmons, I can let my dirty little secret out, too.

I tune out sportscasters. During the Liveblogapocalypse, I had to remind myself to even note who was broadcasting the game. When AA left the door open for Channel Four team members to contribute more to the site, I knew I couldn't cover announcing any better than it is already being done by our fearless leader.

So I'll be looking at sports writing, which has, these days, become sort of the minor leagues for TV punditry anyway. I'll mercilessly root out cliches, expose hackery at every level, and even hand out kudos for good, original insight.

This week, I'll be focusing on the hometown columnists of the Final Four teams. For papers that need a login to read, I've provided a generic login that we can all use:

login ID: awfulwrite@gmail.com password: freeharold

I'll get started after the jump.

We'll start our tour with a West Coast Bias (someone has to have one, right?) The L.A. Times is covering the UCLA Bruins, and the most common angle they're taking is "Bruins want Revenge on Gators". Hey, guys, you have to play another game after that one to win the championship:

Ben Howland says "Stop! Collaborate and Listen..." Best line: ""Sometimes you block out his voice and go on instinct," sophomore Josh Shipp said." Hope you enjoy wind sprints, Josh.

Gin N' Goat Cheese - Arron Afflalo grew up on a farm... in Compton. Best line: "We'd be doing squats up and down the road and horses would chase us."

The Final Four is waaay better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick.

Required reading for the Times staff: The Little Engine That Could.
History Suggests UCLA Loss
Bruins Could Be Gator Meat

Cali lives up to its reputation as a progressive state. Most of the Bruins' Final Four coverage comes from Diane Pucin and Helene Elliott.

Collecting the links is taking a while, so rather than make you wait for a long post about all four teams, I'm going to publish this one now, and put out three more posts the rest of the day to cover the rest of the teams.