Jay Bilas Single-Handedly Ending Binge Drinking Surrounding The NBA Draft

Monday, June 30, 2008

I for one thought Jay Bilas spent the entire NBA Draft trying to make up new terms for players and it turns out I was right. Jay, being completely aware of the drinking game surrounding his hyperbole, decided it was best to use various synonyms of the word "long" and in turn save the collective liver of the World!

Did you notice that I did not use the terms "long" or "upside" a single time during ESPN's NBA draft coverage? I am aware of the drinking games that are based upon the use of such terms, and I did my level best to reduce binge drinking across the country. We all have to do what we can. Instead of "long," I used the terms "length," "stretch," "elongated," "extend" and the ever-popular "considerable linear extent in space." With one player, I stated that his arms "extend beyond normal or moderate limits." The descriptive term "long" has been a term of art in basketball for years, but it was kind of fun to see if I could go the entire draft without using it. I'll probably go back to my usual terminology now.
Well that's good. At least we got one year off from the "long" talk, but I don't know what bothers me more. Repeated use of one descriptive word or trying to make up terms to replace it. It's good that Bilas has a sense of humor about it though.

'Long' thoughts on the NBA draft (ESPN Insider)

Posted by Awful Announcing- at 2:11 PM

11 Comments:

Somewhere in a college town, students are now playing drinking games to AA posts. I counted 5 "long"'s in there...Line up the shots, fellas!

Nick said...
Jun 30, 2008, 2:35:00 PM  

Since Jay didn't make much of a name for himself on the court, perhaps he's trying to do so by making up words. Jumpability and popability are two of my favorite recent Bilasisms. I have no doubt that hopability and shootability will be featured prominently in next year's draft show.

sd sports guy said...
Jun 30, 2008, 2:44:00 PM  

Hilarious!

VeRonda said...
Jun 30, 2008, 2:46:00 PM  

I'm definitely not against that Nick, but you should probably add the word "Seriously" and the phrase "With That Said" to the list.

Jun 30, 2008, 2:59:00 PM  

I personally enjoyed his term "stick-backs" instead of the commonly used and recognized "put backs"

Anonymous said...
Jun 30, 2008, 3:04:00 PM  

@AA

Seriously? OK, well...with that said, consider those terms added.

Nick said...
Jun 30, 2008, 3:27:00 PM  

How about just focusing on a decent telecast, Jay???

GMoney said...
Jun 30, 2008, 4:10:00 PM  

Two additions to your game, nick:

1 - Drink whenever 'AA Hates ESPN' makes a post
2 - Drink whenever someone makes a post to correct a headline or a part of speech

Anonymous said...
Jun 30, 2008, 4:43:00 PM  

I never have anything good to say about Dookies, so you know it's genuine when I write that I like Jay Bilas. This is a nice follow-up to his owning of LeRetard a few weeks back.

Kyle said...
Jun 30, 2008, 5:47:00 PM  

I've enjoyed Bilas, and I like him even more after this. It's really amusing that he purposely didn't use those words (which are stupid to begin with), even though I'm sure he didn't do it just to "reduce binge drinking across the country."

Anonymous said...
Jun 30, 2008, 11:05:00 PM  

I think this is great. He was being creative AND bowing to pressure from listeneres who don't like part of his schtick.

J Rose said...
Jul 1, 2008, 12:37:00 PM  

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