If Someone Invites You To A Catholic Wedding, RUN AWAY!

Saturday, May 19, 2007

I hate weddings. Especially Catholic wedding because, unlike a regular Sunday Mass, there is absolutely no chance you're getting out of there early. Doesn't matter who the priest is, he's gonna take that whole hour (and more, if necessary) if it kills him. Which, if you are not one of ones who is actually getting married, can make for a rough day.

Why this? Why now? Because I went to a Catholic wedding today. The bride and groom are friends of my in-laws, very nice people, but it wasn't the best Saturday afternoon of my life. All things considered, I'd rather have been here with you all, typing up random rants about Barbaro and posting YouTube compilations of injuries to the Yankees pitching staff. It would've been awesome.

Instead, I'm posting this Bud Light commercial that illustrates EXACTLY what I needed earlier this afternoon. The genius that came up with this has obviously attended his or her share of Catholic weddings.



(This post was brought to you by the letters O, M, D, and Q)

Posted by One More Dying Quail at 8:06 PM

3 Comments:

Agreed, brother. I went to one of these last weekend. And I honestly felt bad for the couple, too, because after the kiss, they still have to sit there for another 20-30 minutes watching everyone take communion and such. At my wedding, after the kiss, we were presented as man and wife and we sprinted out of there.

My all-time favorite, though, is the jewish tradition of smashing the glass - that lets you know it's party time!

extrapolater said...
May 19, 2007, 10:02:00 PM  

The only Catholic wedding I ever went to was my cousin Michael's, back in '82. It's a good thing I was a strapping young lad of 29 at the time. All of that genuflecting played hell on my knees.

cardsrul said...
May 20, 2007, 1:12:00 AM  

An hour for the ceremony? Totally unacceptable.

And then Extra P is saying you have to wait 20-30 minutes AFTER the kiss to leave as man and wife. That's crazy.

If you can't tell, I've never been to a catholic wedding. Isn't this why Luther started the Reformation? This is another example of how a shot clock would make almost everything in life better.

jon pyle said...
May 20, 2007, 1:22:00 PM  

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