Pam has been dispatched to a Div. II playoff game and I think the ESPN Radio game is USC-UCLA.

"Can Oklahoma dial it up again? A conference championship game after 2 big weeks." - Andre Ware making it sound like that Oklahoma is playing their 3rd straight conference championship game.

Look at the Army-Navy game.

Gouge my eyes out over the uniforms on both teams!

"Last of the paper ballots here." - Fowler to Corso after Corso said he sent in Heisman vote.
"We vote online" - Howard on his and Fowler's voting method.
"Will OJ vote" - Fowler
"He wont be voting online." - Howard

I wont even dicuss the fact three of the four Gameday hosts have votes.

Sign at last night's MAC chamionship:

"12-0 at the home of 0-12", this was before the start of the game, and before Ball State treated the ball like a hot potato.

"It is 31 degrees here, almost balmy" Ian Eagle at the start of Army-Navy.

"I cant remeember the last time I did a game that featured two fullbacks" - Boomer Esiason
"We can almost count the passes on one hand"- Eagle

"Both Teams sporting new uniforms today," Ian Eagle
"Yea, the Army's wearing camaflauge shirts and camaflauge pants, while the Navy's looking sharp" Boomer Esiason showing dislike on Army's uniforms

"This kickoff is driving Johnson deep." - Dave Pasch

Tulsa has more Johnsons then you know what to do with (not like that, you sick freaks) so we should be having a lot of fun with Dave and Andre

Interplace, which uniform's fuglier, the Cincinnati Bungles or the Army uniforms?

"Known for the stiff arm, that's his signature move."
Followed immediately by:
"On playstation I think it's the C button."
Brock Huard on UConn running back.

How can something done by every player ever be a signature move?

And also, PS doesn't have a "C" button.

Some quotes from the MAC championship last night. Nothing really golden, but still some funny ones.

"Actually I'm gonna take ballroom dancing lessons." - Chris Spielman as McDonough mentioned Dancing With The Stars

"Welcome back to So You Think Your Commute Was Rough" - Rob Stone on the many misfortunes the University of Buffalo fan bus had on its way to Detroit

"He makes big plays." - Chris Spielman's brillant analysis on the TD reception by Naaman Roosevelt

"He just keeps working and working and working, hugging up on the back." - Chris Spielman

"Scoop and score, that's exactly what he did." - Chris Spielman on a Buffalo fumble return for a touchdown. And while a somewhat moot point because Buffalo was successful, Spielman was defending the fact that he tried to pick up up and run as opposed to just falling on it.

"Akingba was down in the pile fighting and comes away with buried treasure." - Chris Spielman making no sense.

"Johnson being a touchdown maker." - Sean McDonough

North Alabama at Northwest Missouri State is where Pam Ward is lcoated today.

Army should've copied the San Diego Padres Sunday jerseys.

If anyone has GamePlan, theyre showing the I-AA playoff games throughout the day.

I'm getting Villanova's game on the WPVI Digital subchannel today.

Upset alert: East Carolina 14, Tulsa 0

ESPN Radio also has the Big XII Championship Game after USC / UCLA for most of its affiliates. Westwood One has the SEC and ACC Championships

The radio fun should start at 10 am up in my area, I hope.

Big J, it's officially called the Big 12 Conference, not the Big XII.

"There's nothing like artery clogging, tailgating food at 9:00 AM. Those are my kind of people." - Bob Wischusen

"1st down in Tulsa territory." - Dave Pasch on a Tulsa first down inside ECU territory.

"Being President is a pretty good deal. You get invited to a lot of great events, and a lot of presents." - Esiason
"you just found out about this ?" - Eagle, considering Esiason went to college less than 10 miles from DC I hope not

Holy crap are those Army unis fugly.

Damn you, JFein. You beat me to the punch on UConn tailgating.

Poor Charleston DirecTV viewers aren't getting to see the Army-Navy game, as our CBS is out.

@ S2N: If you have the software that's required, I'm pretty sure the SEC title game is being streamed on CBSSportsline.

"App State the New England Patriots of college football." - a quote from the U of Richmond coach as told by one of the announcers.

I'm not familiar enough with I-AA to know the coach's name

"Should have just put up the fair catch signal."- Andre Ware after a ECU player dropped a ball on a short kickoff

Andre, he dropped it....it doesn't matter.

"See the big fellow at the top of the screen, he's asking for the football." - Andre Ware
"He's flashing" - Dave Pasch

Awkward silence followed.

For a brief second there was 25:15 remaining in the first quarter of Tulsa-ECU.

"On playstation you hit 'c' or 'x' for that move..." - Whoever is color for Uconn-Pitt game.

"This is different from the spread, which you will see Florida use later today on CBS" - Esiason being the good corporate shill while analyzing Navy's offense

Didn't Sam Ryan used to be a blonde? Maybe I'm confusing her with Alex Flannagan.

"I mean, look at that. That's great protection by the Army offensive line." -- Boomer Esiason, as the Army QB gets sacked

"How about a college that makes their own ice cream! That is my kind of school." -Bob Wischusen

Hey Bob Wischusen, Todd Blackledge called. Penn State also makes ice cream as well.

And in case you're intereseted, Bommer Esiason went to Maryland.

Dave Pasch after a replay showing Tulsa's O-line staying put on a free play: "Don't move. that's what they teach you."

"Welcome to The Tampa, everyone." - The Brad Nessler during the pregame of the ACC championship game featuring the Boston College and the Virginia Tech.

EEEEEEEEEILTELL&ROOTWRPWTRWWTE:HTTETTEFHSLIETCCNFKGROY#*O&!!#!$

@JFein, Brad Nessler is following Mike Tirico now?

If anyone sees Gay amn or Swearing Man, tell 'em to stay classy for me, will ya?

BTW, Virginia Tech rocking the retro 1960's unis today.

I forgot I'd downloaded MS Silverlight earlier. Army-Navy is a go on this computer!

YOU ALL HAVE AIDS!!!!



'Cause I FUCKED YOU!

tell me someone else saw brad and paul using lines from santa claus is coming to town to talk about the Va. Tech D

Todd Harris not as good looking as Stacey Dales, though.

Stay classy, Anon 1:09 PM!

Pam Ward has a penis.

Todd Harris is synonymous with episodes of World's Strongest Man.

Anon 1:11 PM...

You are sick...

"The Hoakies have to get back to Beamer Ball, which is take away the ball on defense, take away the ball on special teams." - Bob Griese

So in other words, just take away the ball.

@ Murph: Yeah, I saw that and that was bad.

"You better watch out, you better not cry, you better not pout I'm telling you why." - Brad Nessler
"Virginia Tech's defense is coming to town." - Paul Maguire

With Sam Ryan and Tracy Wolfson, I think CBS has the lock on attractive sideline reporters today.

First HD TV, AA??? Wow! That is exciting. That first moment of home HD experience is like not knowing you have poor vision and then getting glasses. Enjoy!

BTW - when should we hear from EA Sports re: the NCAA 09 basketball game.

Not a college football quote, but I was watching the WIAA (Washington State) 4A High School Football Championship game between Skyline and Issaquah on Friday.

Pretty dramatic stuff, Skyline maintained their prefect record and won it all 20-15, but Jason Gesser (who does college games as well) came up with this gem:


"The interception could be the last pass of his [Issaquah QB] college career."


He corrected himself later.

"No chair for Rece. Mark May and Lou Holtz have nice comfy chairs and the man who runs the show has nothing." - Bob Wischusen

If only I was watching this game. The two times I checked the score, 5 seconds later Bob Wischusen had some sort of gem.

Oh my Nessler and McGuire said that?



If that doesn't finish in the top 5 then this competition is fickled.

Fuck everyone 'cause i am the best.

Remember the upsaet alert I posted on the C-USA championship game? Well, it's now 17-17.

@ SSR: Yep, and right before that Nessler called Paul Maguire, Pablo.

@ jfein - It's Conf USA. Therefore, it doesn't count. Now if you've got an upset alert for the Big 12 Championship we would all be interested in THAT!

thanks JFein. i heard it and then my brain went dead.

I think Maguire thrice mentioned how hard the VT running back hit the hole on that last play.

App State leads Richmond 7-6 at half

@ Mal: Yeah, but everyone was saying how Tulsa was going to wipe the floor with ECU. So in the context of an upset, the fact that this game is even 17-17 in the 2nd quarter is a surprise.

I noticed that in "The Tampa", there are many empty seats. Maybe it wasn't Jacksonville's fault after all...

Walnuts, Sam Ryan has always been a brunette as far as I know. Alex Flanagan is the blonde.

"I have to get one of those Army hats." - Esiason
"You know people you have connections." - Eagle, they were referncing Army's SID. Plus the Army coaching staff is Bobby Ross's (Esiason's college coach)old staff, there is a good chace he knows someone.

"Let's take another look at him filling this hole." - Brd Nessler

"He's just heading to the hole....sees it and slams it."- Paul Maguire

I left out a few words for comedy's sake.

Well, on a non-related note, Joe Buck will call his first Cardinals game next week when they face the Vikings.


The head scratcher is the Redskins/Bengals getting Kenny, Moose, and Goose.


SteveR (the man who gets these assignments) will fill the506 forums in on the last commentary pair.

Stay classy, "Joe Buck".

"It will be the last play of the quarter barring the penalty." - Brad Nessler

Do correct me if I'm wrong, but do they have an untimed down at the end of the 1st quarter if there's a defensive penalty on the play?

@ YAIWAMB


Because watching ACC football is the most boring thing in college sports.

@Mal: They call themselves "C-USA" as well.

@ SSR: The Bengals have hung tough in all 3 of their previous bouts with the NFC East.

"Hello, everyone I'm giddy." - Tim Brando at halftime of Army-Navy. He was referncing the atmosphere in Atlanta.

Brando just said Texas could play Ohio St in the Fiesta Bowl. How the hell do the Suckeyes warrant a BCS berth ?

"There's another place I'll never go, is underwater"-Paul Maguire after a clip was shown of a pair of scuba divers at The Florida Aquarium.

Maguire scuba diving would make for great comedy.

@ SSR: Nessler, Griese, and Maguire are providing the main entertainment in that game, not the actual game itself.

Can we call the ACC Championship game an upset alert?

I'm gonna play along with the ACC title game AFLAC trivia question. 4 teams that have gone to bowl games in the last 15 years...

Michigan
Ohio State
Virginia Tech
USC

Just guessing of the top of my head.

Coming soon, Paul Maguire in the remake of Holes in the Sheia LeBouf role.

jg, because they can bring a lot of people to Arizona as Texas whips their ass.

@ S2N: You got the new TV already?

Va Tech
Michigan
Florida
FSu

Hey J,

He just left to get one. I'll be here for a half an hour or so updating. Anyone plan on watching Pammy during that D-II game?

Ohio State and USC missed at least one bowl games in the late 1990s.

Well, I got 2 out of 4. The answers were

Michigan
Virginia Tech
Florida
Florida State

I got the aflac trivia question right!

And michigan will be home for the holidays much to the chagrin (and liver) of RJBO.

An eight-letter clue in a crossword for a Jared ad:

Schmucks.

ESPN.com's "upset watch" has Pitt over UConn and Va. Tech over BC. Seriously, are either of those really an upset?

BTW, next year, Army-Navy will be on the second Saturday in December.

So does that mean Uncle Vern and crazy Uncle Gary get to do the game?

@ AA: Gotcha. That makes sense because if I recall correctly S2N doesn't get ESPN360 and that was a really quick purchasing of an HDTV.

"That's what Paul looks like on a Thurday night" - Brad Nessler as they showed some sort of bird.

Virginia Tech vs. Cincinnati could very well be your Orange Bowl.


If you thought Thom Brennaman sounded boring before......

@JamesCraven: More time for Michigan to recruit...their own guys from transferring.

That first TD pass for Matt Ryan (who shouldn't be interviewed during the game via phone) should be invalidated: It was against the Lions.

Va Tech actually has some offense today.

@ AA: And to think my school nearly (and if you caugh my rant earlier should be) ended up playing today (although the team that beat them is playing now on ESPN Classic so I guess it wouldn't have mattered much).

And besides, who would watch D-2 when we have the closest thing to a national semifinal game on at the same time.

@ SSR: Thom Brennaman does have some good calls when the game is really tight at the end (see Boise-Oklahoma), but other than that, yeah, he'll yawn half his audience to sleep with that one.

UPSET WATCH: Richmond 9 App State 7

Walnuts 1:52

The fact that the Suckeyes are even in the running for a BCS game shows what a joke these polls are and how much "laundry picks" (to quote Pat Forde of ESPN) totaly screw up the rankings.

UConn sports = ESPN agenda

Real upset alert: Richmond leads App State 16-7 with 7:21 left in 3rd

who would watch D-2 when we have the closest thing to a national semifinal game on at the same time.

Take one for the team. For the good of the Pammies!

I might skip the SEC pregame and turn to it during the commercials. That D-II game should be better than USC-UCLA.

I've noticed Nessler and Greise give Maguire the Kournheiser treatment and fake laugh at his jokes.

Well Boston College is screwing up another chance to be in the BCS.


Assuming Oklahoma and USC win I project:


Rose Bowl

USC vs. Penn State


Orange Bowl

Va. Tech vs. Cincinnati


Fiesta Bowl

Texas vs. Utah


Sugar Bowl

Alabama/Florida vs. Ohio State


National Title Game

Florida/Alabama vs. Oklahoma

Might be a good day for Va. football. Va Tech is leading in the ACC championship, JMU is no.1 and hosting Villanova and UR is beating App State.

Upset alert: ECU 24, Tulsa 17.

@ walnuts: To your point about upsets and how Pitt over UConn and Va Tech over BC are "upsets", well this is your upset. Not too many people gave ECU a chance over Tulsa.

Hopefully Mizzou beats Choklahoma tonight in the Big XII championship.

If Missouri wins then Texas probably gets in the title game should USC lose.

@ SSR: If Mizzou pulls off the upset and beats Oklahoma, then it would be Texas (most likely).

It's almost like we have 2 semifinal games today. The only thing being is that Missouri is playing for Texas.

I agree, JFein, and yet it isn't on ESPN.com's "upset watch".
Remember when ECU was ranked in the top 10 after beating WVU and Va. Tech and Skippy was rumored to be leaving for a bigger coaching job?

Richmond just scored again 23-7 5:46 left in 3rd

@ SSR: You really think USC has a shot? I don't see a win over UCLA catapulting them over Texas.

Stu Scott laughs at Nessler's attempt at karaoke.

That video of Nessler as Elvis was just ridiculous.

Seeya later, App State! It's also ridiculous that game isn't on in basic cable dispite Boone, NC being only 2hrs from Charlotte.

ESPN blows sometimes.

@ Walnuts: Yep, I remember it. The funny part is is that it was ESPN that was giving them no chance at the beginning of the game, citing the fact that they would never be able to outscore the high-powered Tulsa offense.

"This is a fake by Dodge!...and he punts it at the last minute." - Dave Pasch on an option punt.

I don't know what was worse: Nessler's Elvis or Dubya's 9 yard kick off a tee before the coin toss.

If ECU wins, I predict Skippy will bolt for Syracus even though ECU is probably a better gig.

Pitt/UConn 20-10......SHOOTOUT!

"the lack of a QB running game is hurting App State." - one of the announcers, no what's hurting them is trailing by 16 late in the third.

App State just scored TD misses 2 pt, 23-13 Richmond 1:51 left in 3rd

@ JFein, it's the BCS, they will do anything to get USC in the spotlight.

Adolph Bush XLIII: SEIG HEIL!

Worst. President. Ever.

Even worse than Millard Fillmore.

-There's Taylor. There's Tyler. There's Fillmore and there's Hayes. There's William Henry Harrison.
-I died in thirty days!

We are the mediocre presidents!

But William Henry Harrision had influenza in less than 30 days.

It may be C-USA, but ECU-Tulsa is the most entertaining game on right now. Winner goes to the Autozone Liberty Bowl. Loser heads to the utterly meaningless GMAC Bowl.

He got sick because his inauguation speech was so long and he didn't have a jacket dispite being really cold in Washington.

Better than the socialist-elect

ECU-Vandy in the Liberty Bowl!

@ James Craven: He caught influenza from making his inauguration speech out in the rain. He made the speech, caught influenza, and 30 days later we were burying William Henry Harrison.

This is how all sports commentators should call moments from now on:


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0NUwfKQ_rJs

Excuse my earlier Simpsons reset. These games aren't really holding my attention. I hate to say this, but...
I MISS PAM*!!!!

*For comedic value only

Jay Crawford giving a check.......weak.

Was Dana Jacbson busy with a meeting with Jose, Jim, and Jack?

"He tried to get too cute there, to pull it(the ball) out. Option fullbacks have told me, if youre past the QB the ball's yours." - Esiaison on a botched exchange

Richmond leads 26-13 10:10 left in 4th

Dana's with Mr. Belvedere, walnuts.

Maguire trying to be funny on the pirate ship.

You have to see this Paul MacGuire skit with a parrot. So terrible it's good.

Where's Stacey?

@ Walnuts


Dana doing it would be classic.


Dana: Gezza you've won $100,000, what are your feelings right now?

Gezza: Well I'd like to thank god and...

Dana: You'd like to thank god? F*** GOD!!! You threw a f****** football into a hole!!!

We've been wondering about Stacy the last two weeks, Paulie Walnuts

Bob Wischusen: "Who could ever remember such a piece of television?"
After a partial airing of Valvano's ESPY Speech

Don't you mean forget?

And Dana would do that on a grey Goose vodka bender...

Actually, she just called and is coming to my place tonight.

"That one was thrown at 150 miles per hour." - Dave Pasch

As if we did not get enough hyperbole with Dr. Kornheiser on MNF!

Stacey, I meant... certainly not Dana.

@JFein: California PA is losing big to Minnesota-Duluth.

First it was Matt Ryan, now Flute. Is Hasselbach and Glenn Foley scheduled for the 4th quarter?

"The sum of the parts is greater than the team. The combination of the parts is greater....what am I trying to say?" - Jon Ritchie

Why is it that whenever I turn a game on just to see the score I come across a Pammy gem?

@ James Craven: Had that been Bloom, I fear it would have been much worse. On paper Cal PA was better than Bloom last week, but if it wasn't for those damn officials....

Sorry, I won't get on this soapbox again.

"You go winless at the University of Washington, you get fired" Petros Papadakis



"Washington trying to salvage another something-something" Barry Tomkins

Ian Eagle just nailed a quiz given by Boomer. Besides the US Naval Academy (Roger Staubach and Jimmy carter), what other schiools have produced a President of the United States and a Super Bowl winning quarterback?

Answer: Miami (OH) - Benjamainn Harrison and Ben Rothleisburger; Stanford - Jim Plunkett, John Elway and Herbert Hoover; Michigan - Tom Brady and Gerald R. Ford.

"Tulsa lives and dies by the pass, and I think they got the latter there." - DeMarco Farr, talking about the Conference USA championship

"You wonder if East Carolina gets into the Autozone Liberty Bowl or the GMAC bowl, if they'll have enough players, with all of their injuries." - Dave Pasch
"Good point." - Andre Ware

Idiocy knows no limits.

Richmond scored up 33-13 over App State. Gameover!

Navy just beat Army 27-0 and will play in the EagleBank Bowl in two weeks.

Check that. 34-0.

Tulsa-ECU tied up.

Oh man, while celebrating a big play for Va Tech, a back up wide receiver did the celebratory punch and hit Frank Beamer hard in the back of the head.

HELLO!

To think, the folks in Louvul are missing a good football game because WHAS opted to air a Caridinals basketball cupcake game.

"It's been that type of year for the dogs."-Petros, talking about the awful Washington team.

Jahvid Best scores for Cal untouched, and UW's winless season is not in danger. 7-0 Cal.

Dave Pasch: "Our yellow line is usually accurate."

And unofficial.

I cannot stand Freecreditreport.com......the commercials are irritating.

It sucks to be a Seattle sports fan in 2008.

The Mariners lost 100 games, the Seahawks have mailed the season in, the SuperSonics are sucking in Oklahoma City, and UDub football is about to go 0-12. KIinda like Philadelphia pre-1974.

@ James, and to add to that we're getting an MLS team.

It's a final.

Appy State has been dethroned.

"Jahvid Best is one of those guys that has a live body." - Petros Papadakis

"Does East Carolina go for it on 4th down?" - Dave Pasch

Let's see. The game is tied. There's less than 2-minutes left. Tulsa is out of timeouts. You're at the 19 yard-line. You make the call.

And SSReporters, you will get +1 next year because you got Freddie Lunjberg.

ECU attempted the field goal and it was up....AND GOOD!

Upset alert: ECU 27, Tulsa 24 with 1:43 to go.

Does it matter James? The MLS is becoming the home of washed up European players.


At least Kevin Calabro is calling the games.

If ECU scores here, would not having timeouts hurt Tulsa ? " - Pasch assuming the Capt Obvious role, no trailing late in the 4th without timeouts is NEVER a problem

INTERCEPTED! ECU is going to the Autozone Liberty Bowl!

Turnover #7 for Tulsa, ECU stuns Tulsa.

"1:03 left knee time for East Carolina" - Ware after the pick

"They were upset by East Carolina this year in the opening week and they had some really tough road games. That's part of the reason they have 4-losses this year." - Brad Nessler

Let's see losing a game is part of the reason why you have 4 losses...GENIUS!

What's a pirate's favorite letter?

(All together now)

Arrrrrrrrrr!

Dan Patrick got the joke off the internet last week.

"Does he get the sack, even though it was a halfback pass."-Petros Papadakis

"So we put the jinx on him."- Barry Tompkins, talking about Cal's miss field goal.

"This is where you'll see Frank Beamer grind it here." - Brad Nessler

Note to Nessler: Never give me that image again.

"If youre Frank Beamer you just grind it out here" - Nessler

VA tech proceeds to fumble then Nesler says:

"You can scratch what i just said"

"Nobody on the board here when Sean White takes the bitch..."--Wendy Nix on "College Football Scoreboard"

"It was such a bang-bang play." - Brad Nessler

"I don't know if it was the helmet or the ball, but they both came out" Petros Papadakis

"You got a lot of angry guys at the University of Washington, that want to take it out on other guys." Petros

"He's a young Italian guy, that just started kicking" Petros

Petros Papadakis has a terrible announcing voice.

"We know that Billy Flutie threw one on a fake last year, last week rather." - Brad Nessler

"We know Billy Flutie threw a touchdown pass on a fake field goal last year...er..last week." - Brad Nessler

"If Texas is not in the Championship game, they will definitely have a beef, no pun intended." Spenser Tillman

Most of the time somebody says "no pun intended" they really do mean the pun.

"Some serious cracking going on." - Brad Nessler

"Hey, I took off my shoes." - Paul MacGuire

"He is looking like he just got a haircut before the game" Petros

"You have to watch the fake here"

"And they fake it first down. Good call Coach." Whoever is calling the Villanova-JMU game.

Petros will start work on Season 4 of "Pros vs. Joes" in a week or two.

"Cal has brought a lot of swagger in the Jeff Tedford era" Petros

Pros vs. Joes is a good show.


Touchdown Cal.....17-0 Cal, winless Huskies!