Your Opening Two Rounds In Quotes

Monday, March 23, 2009

Every year, I try to put together some of the better quotes from each round of the Tournament, and this year is no different. The first two rounds had some hilarious quotes, and thanks to everyone who took the time to send them in or post them as comments. Before we get to those, I'd like to take a look at some of the early CBS announcing "winners and losers". Let's get into it....


Tim Brando- I thought Brando had a much better showing this go around, but he still tries to force things. You don't need to try to come up with an analogy or witty comment for every single play during a game. Especially when you're terrible at it.

Gus Johnson- GuJo seemed a bit rattled in the first few rounds, and even read scores from other regions while trying to relay the score of the game he was calling. Maybe he was still reeling from the restaurant incident a few days back.

Clark Kellogg- Just isn't ready for the big time yet. He's another guy who tries to force everything and make the routine exciting. You don't need to yell at the top of your lungs about a box-out....especially in the first four minutes of an opening round games.


Bill Raftery- Raft has taken away the "Gus Johnson Karma" and ended up calling just about every close game in the first two rounds. He always has fun and anytime he brings his "lingerie" reference into a game, I just crack up. Some might find him annoying, but I've always loved his passion, and he should be on the first team with Nantz. DOUBLE ORDER!

Jay Bilas- I still think he seems a bit angry at times, but there isn't a better live game analyst in the game at the moment.

Jim Nantz- He surprisingly didn't get on my nerves early this year, and he made up for Clark Kellogg's hyperbole throughout the first two rounds.


“With the nine inches size advantage he has on Abrham.”- Clark Kellogg
“And that’s a big one.”- Jim Nantz
“That sure is a large one.”- Clark Kellogg
“It’s a big one too.”- Jim Nantz
“That’s big all the way around.”- Clark Kellogg

“Oh Onions! Double order!!!”- Bill Raftery

"He is working up on Johnson." - Jim Nantz

"The iron down right rude."- Tim Brando

"He gets that guy behind him and takes him for a ride." - Clark Kellogg

"He is listed at 210, but I think that is with 2 anvils in his pockets."- Dan Bonner

"Brockman with his 59th double double of the season."- Kevin Harlan

"Manny just being Manny from downtown!" - Tim Brando

"A lot of DNA left on the floor tonight." – Tim Brando

"A lot of blood, cotton swabs, are we here for CSI?" – Tim Brando

"That brings back memories of my wedding night."- Kevin Harlan, talking about a song they played coming back from break (BTW- It was “The Humpty Dance)

"You gotta bring your slingshot and be ready to go." - Clark Kellogg

"Larry Sanders shot...shocking..block.....SHOCKING BLOCK SHOTTING..." - Dick Enberg

"Tigers lead by a dozen. They've got the eye of the tiger." – Tim Brando

"They've got fans in full throat today in Portland." - Kevin Harlan

"Most of the times you need a saddle to ride a guy like that"- Jay Bilas

"They don't necessarily have to score, but the ball has to touch the rim every time they are down there." - Clark Kellogg

"I can't drive 55, in Kansas City."- Tim Brando referring to the score of the game which is 55 all.

“Hackett pops out wide open. And strokes it." – Gus Johnson

And my personal favorite....

“Lingerie in the air! Swirling!!!”- Bill Raftery

Posted by Awful Announcing at 1:25 PM


I'm loving Lundquist and Raftery. I swear it is like Verne has never watched a basketball game in his life, and Raftery is the biggest fan. Watching them call the Siena v. OSU game was just money! Best duo of the tourney!

David said...
Mar 23, 2009, 1:56:00 PM  

I echo David...I don't think I've ever met anyone who has found Raftery annoying.

My favorite quote from Bill was during the 1st half of the Pitt/Okie State game when each team was draining threes and not playing defense.

"Verne, it appears the coaches signed a non-aggression pact before the game."

Verne then laughed for 3 minutes straight.

Ed James said...
Mar 23, 2009, 2:01:00 PM  

I forgot to add another awesome Raf quote. Siena was down 1 to Ohio State with almost no time left in regulation and the Siena player had 2 free throws. He missed the first. Pressure mounting...he makes the second. Raf says...

"Good for him. You always root for the kid."

That was awesome. And I had picked Ohio State.

Ed James said...
Mar 23, 2009, 2:07:00 PM  

Raft had another good one when they showed the 11 year old daughter of the Morehead State coach as Louisville was pulling away and she put her head in her hands.

"Daddy! Do something!"

I laughed for about 5 minutes.

Also no mention of Bilas dropping a Hey Now after a huge Larry Sanders rejection?

" Larry Sanders out of nowhere for the block. HEY NOW!"

rs27 said...
Mar 23, 2009, 2:17:00 PM  

As great as they are, I thought it was hilarious listening to Verne scream "YES!" all day Friday. He was about to lose his pitch by the end of the night when Siena kept making big shots and he kept screaming, "YES!". Love the duo, and they've been the best on the tourney for some time. The Raft, Bilas, McDonough trio during the season in the Big East is also top notch.

TomahawkFlop said...
Mar 23, 2009, 2:20:00 PM  

Clark was better than the alternative. Of course, almost everyone would be better than THAT alternative. How Tim Brando remains employed amazes me. Bolerjack I thought was a bit better than last year. We have to give Carter Blackburn a full slate of games next year. He is one of the best young guys to make it probably since Jim Nantz.

Nathan Brice said...
Mar 23, 2009, 2:43:00 PM  

When Craig Bolerjack is welcoming you to the know you are watching a game CBS does not care about.

Ed James said...
Mar 23, 2009, 2:51:00 PM  

Brando was unbearable on Saturday. After not going 15 seconds without mentioning Blake Griffin's name, he said that he has had a "quiet 30 and 15". Also, he (or maybe the other guy) praised the defense of an Oklahoma defender for "sliding into a charge" which is, you know, illegal.

And as for the iron being rude quote, the "iron was unkind" after every single miss. Someone needs to tell him to switch it up a bit.

Mike said...
Mar 23, 2009, 2:59:00 PM  

Bolerjack and Wenzel are turrible. Since both Wisconsin and Marquette were in Boise, residents of my fine state got to hear a lot of these two. Wenzel isn't so bad trying to rip off Raftery but Bolerjack drags him down. He would never tell you why a whistle was blown and said that a player had been tied up every time a fould was called. I must've heard the phrase "Hanging on a pivot" about 20 times from him Bolerjack.

Joe said...
Mar 23, 2009, 4:12:00 PM  

I don't care what you say about Gus. When he informed the public that Dayton's Charles Little is affectionately known as "Dinosaur Head", it was the best moment of the tournament.

GMoney said...
Mar 23, 2009, 4:15:00 PM  

I was stuck with a lot of Brando and Wenzeljack this past weekend. And my ears still haven't quite bleeding.

49er16 said...
Mar 23, 2009, 4:26:00 PM  

I have no idea, when Packer was let go, why CBS did not make Lundquist and Raftery the number one team on college basketball. They are the best duo around period. Clark Kellog, Kevin Harlan and Tim Brando make my ears bleed.

mandb97 said...
Mar 23, 2009, 4:30:00 PM  

I was *SO* lucky this week. I live in the Alabama area, so I got Verne/Raft all weekend. Was so awesome.

Alex said...
Mar 23, 2009, 4:35:00 PM  

What Joe said.

Also, I really, REALLY enjoyed Bilas this weekend, and I really wish he was doing the big games and the Final Four... I'm hoping this gets fixed next year.

Rob in WI said...
Mar 23, 2009, 4:42:00 PM  

After one – of many wrestling and near-wrestling matches underneath the basket this weekend – in which one player was felled by a rather large forearm, Raftery said it wasn't intentional but "unattractive." First time I've heard that, and I grew up listening to the late Chick Hearn.

Steve Smith said...
Mar 23, 2009, 5:11:00 PM  

Nathan Brice is on

Does he still live with his mommy in a basement in a van down by the river?

/sarcastic mode

JamesCraven said...
Mar 23, 2009, 8:19:00 PM  

I think it is obvious that Jim Nantz's time has passed. Without Packer it just isn't working anymore and he needs to move on. Too boring, slow, and has no feel for the dramatic. His response is always canned and made-up well in advance. It is almost as if he is using the NCAA to prepare for the Masters.

Taylor said...
Mar 23, 2009, 9:09:00 PM  

My best came when Ian Eagle talked about avoiding puns involving Temple's Dionte Christmas, and then said what Raft would have done by saying "It's Christmas time!" in his Raftery impression.

And another from Rafterty: "And Ohio State goes...ZZZZZZZZZZONE!"

JamesCraven said...
Mar 24, 2009, 10:48:00 AM  

Bob Wenzel is the worst. He tries way, way too hard, and is all over whoever is winning at the time.

I'll second Verne and Raft as the best crew. The game winner was an awesome call in the OSU-Siena game.

Bilas, Raft, and McDonough are far and away the best ESPN crew. Great chemistry and enthusiasm without overshadowing the game.

Dan said...
Mar 24, 2009, 12:26:00 PM  

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