Try to imagine yourself in the Cretaceous Period. You get your first look at this "six foot wide coach" as you enter a clearing. He moves like a bird, lightly, bobbing his head. And you keep still because you think that maybe his visual acuity is based on movement like T-Rex, he'll lose you if you don't move. But no, not Mangino. You stare at him, and he just stares right back. And that's when the attack comes. Not from the front, but from the side, from the other two Manginos you didn't even know were there. Because Mangino's a pack hunter, you see, he uses coordinated attack patterns and he is out in force today. And he slashes at you with this... a six-inch retractable claw, like a razor, on the middle toe. He doesn't bother to bite your jugular like a lion. He slashes at you here... or here... or maybe across the belly, spilling your intestines. The point is... you are alive when they start to eat you. So you know... try to show a little respect.

Look! It's Robert Parish's uniform number!

Not visible: the Kansas football team, posing for a portrait behind Mangino and Obie.

obie trice has really let himself go

Is this a Jenny Craig before and after photo?

Me want food!

Obie: "For the last time dude, I'm not a REAL human-sized orange! Stop looking at me like that and stop trying to peel me and eat me. Freak!"

Mangino: "I'm hungry"

What do these two people have in common? They're both wearing outfits that have to be custom made.

It's OK, Obie. Mangino wouldn't dare eat anything healthy.

Does this orange make me look fat?

"i'm gonna eat you!!! get in my belly!!!"

Inset Photo: Kansas Coach Mark Mangino (right) with the Orange Bowl Orange.

changed my mind, probably funnier the other way-

Inset Photo: Kansas Coach Mark Mangino (left) with the Orange Bowl Orange.

changed my mind, probably funnier the other way-

Inset Photo: Kansas Coach Mark Mangino (left) with the Orange Bowl Orange.

Obie: "I'm safe because I'm not deep fried"

"There was confusion early on as to which one was in line to be freshly-squeezed"

Obie the Orange gets his "Lifetime Service Award" and meets his idol. Obie aspires to grow as fully as the coach has some day soon!

Separated at birth, reunited through football.

GIT IN MY BELLY!

Obie, you have any friends at the Chick-Fil-A bowl?

Hi! Are you food?

We're brothers. We're happy and we're singing and we're colored. Give me a HIGH-FIVE!

O shit, Don't eat me! I know I'm food, but I'm healthy and you clearly don't like healthy!

"If you like Pina Coladas, and getting caught in the rain..."

MANGINO CONFUSED BY ORANGE SMILE

HOW CAN THIS MYSTERIOUS CREATURE BE NEARLY AS SPHERICAL AS I

DOES SMILE HAVE FLAVOR

I FIND OUT

PERSON IN SPHERE WHAT

Mangino: So, Obie, how much did FOX offer you to be on their sports celebrity knockoff of "The Biggest Loser" this winter to fill up their writers' strike schedule? I got $100,000.

Obie: Oh, only two things. They promised me I could have all the healthy apples I want, and then they assured me that I wouldn't be the heaviest person involved. (Looks at Mangino, gives sigh of relief.)

Mangino: I just hope they don't tempt me wth cupcakes...

Dad???

Unfortuantly, this was the last known picture of the orange before he disappeared.

If Kansas were playing in the Waffle Fry Bowl the mascot would be in trouble.

30 minutes later, a rotund man was spotted in Miami eating a 10 gallon carton of sherbet.

You're fat, dude.

Obie: "All right, remember your training: maintain eye contact, no sudden movements, and the rhino won't hurt you... man, why did I ever agree to fill in for the Syracuse Orange Man?"

"I've got lots of pulp."

and when i meet that six fingered man, i shall say

"Hello, my name is Obie Montoya, you eat my father, prepare to die!"

It's good to see Chris Farley can grow a mustache, but I thought he was dead? The little fruit next to him must be David Spade.

Obie: Hey, standing next to this guy makes me feel like a Jenny Craig after picture.

Fresh off his consumption of the Sta-puft Marshmallow Man, Mangino eyed his next conquest. Is it just me, or does the orange look extremely frightened?

Who is the large orange again?

Auditions for the next Koolaid guy are down to just these two ... OH YEAHHH!!

I know you are, but what am I?

Who cares who is fatter? At least I got a dick.

Obie thinks to self, "Jesus, that guy's a coronary waiting to happen. At least I'm in a costume, I'm pretty sure that guy ain't."

Obie: "When was the last time you saw your own balls?"

Mangino: "1978, how about you?"

Obie: "Mine must have never descended, because I've never seen them."

Obie: Have you ever eaten a piece of fruit?

Mangino: I eat apple pie, does that count?

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

- The Pavement

I knew I had a brother from another mother!

AA, this pic's popularity rivals the kid who wants to get knocked up by Pat White.
A win in this contest should be considered a 'major'.

"It's spelled O-B-E-S-E, not O-B-I-E."

Mangino and Obie - separated at birth.

And Now, introducing the cast of that long awaited Sequel:

TWINS II!!!!!

Obie:" Hey Coach, look what stomach reduction surgery did for me! You should try it, I'm not half the Orange I used to be!"

Get in my belly,I want to eat you.

Why didn't Princess Leia come with him??

Don't worry, I haven't eaten fruit since 1972.

Pan down! Salacious Crumb must be down there somewhere!

--White Hammer

Oranges: the only thing Mangino doesn't eat.

So, you're a fruit? What's a fruit?

Tuesday's Caption Contest should be the Favre-Madden wedding photo.
Guarantee we'd cross 100 comments with that one.

Obie - "Who has two thumbs and is the skinniest one in this picture? This guy!!!"

I'll trade my Halloween costume for yours. Well, if we can both get out of them.

Don't eat me, bro!

Did you leave your watermelon costume at home again?

And suddenly it got very dark as Mark and Obie blocked out the sunlight.....

You just know it's Henry Winkler in the Orange costume... HEEEEEYYYYYY!!!!

OBIE: You know what happens to people who don't eat Fruits? [Pans to Mark]....


[Voice Overlay] The More You Know.

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..........Too Easy