SNF Live-Blog: Giants @ Cowboys, 1st Half
Sunday, December 14, 2008
I realized I hadn't used a Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders photo all season and I know I've live-blogged several Dallas games this season. Sorry for the oversight.
Marion Barber's in, the Dallas locker room is apparently a disaster area (if you believe ESPN; I think the truth is somewhere between the Four-Letter's hysteria and T.O.'s denial of it all being false), and the Giants want to put away one of their biggest rivals right now.
Myles Austin takes the kickoff out to the Dallas 33 to start. Barber gets the ball first for a yard on the carry. Romo's first pass to Witten is incomplete. Guess that secret-game planning didn't quite work, at least early. Romo goes deep for T.O., and he gets a case of the dropsies with man-to-man coverage.
The boo-birds are out early for Owens. That was quick. R.W. McQuarters gets some change on the punt return, but not much. Start at the 27. DeMarcus Ware ENVELOPS Eli Manning on the first play, and he fumbles, but the Giants recover.
"The over/under on the first T.O. Catch is set at 5:15." - Al, via James Craven
Derrick Ward gets two yards of that nine yard loss back. It'll be 3rd and 17. Chris Canty nails Manning on the 3rd down pass and it falls short. Trading punts early, eh? I thought this wouldn't be so aggressive defensively. Pleasant surprise. Jeff Feagles punts to Patrick Crayton, who gets up to the Dallas 45 for some decent field position.
"He's a great receiver, but he does drop the ball. He doesn't catch it all the time." - John (via JFein)
I want to see a receiver who never drops a pass. It'd be up there with the flying pigs. Shotgun snap blown dead and some funny business between the lines. Witten gets flagged for a false start. Toss to Barber on 1st and 15 loses more yards.
"Get your 340 pounds at least off my guy!" - Al on Flozell Adams and Justin Tuck in a skirmish
"Getting 340 pounds up off anything is really difficult." - John
Another incomplete to Witten. Ball's punted, McQuarters takes it for a fair catch at the 21, but Chase Blackburn is gonna get called for a running into the kicker. However, that's only the five yard variety. Giants ball.
"And so the ball goes over to the Giants." - Al, even after the ref says they have to re-kick. McQuarters takes the ball this time at the 10, as I wonder what Billy Idol's "White Wedding" has to do with football.
"Running into the kicker has to be destroyed. These guys go down faster than a Japanese hooker." - Anon @ 8:37
If you leave only the 15 yard variety, the zebras will start calling that more often, though. Another penalty, this one on the Giants' Rich Seubert for illegal formation, and we'll back it up a bit more. Manning hits The Other Steve Smith, who gets up to the 15. Canty deflects the next pass, and Amani Toomer should have probably held on to that. Eli airs it out for Dominik Hixon, it's incomplete, but they're flagging Terence Newman for P.I. -- and upon replay, that call is complete bullshit. First down at midfield. Ward gets a yard.
Ward gets to the outside to the 41 for a first down, good run and good blocks to get out there. Manning gets another pass tipped. After another Ward run, it's 3rd and 5 at the Dallas 36. Another one tipped away from The Other Steve Smith, and the Giants are punting, trying to pin the Cowboys in. They'll lose five yards on a "snap infraction." Kick bounces inside the 10 yard line, Dallas will start at the 6.
Romo fumbles the snap, picks it up, and hits Witten for three yards. He then goes to Marion Barber, who heads to the 19, barreling over a defender. Move up, Dallas now faces 3rd down after a drop by Tashard Choice. 3rd and 3 becomes 3rd and 8, as Flozell Adams gets flagged for his usual false start penalty. Patrick Crayton comes down with a bullet of the pass at the 35 for a first. Romo then hits T.O. while backpedaling; Owens is at the Giants' 46 before he gets dragged down. Barber gets the next pass, rolling inside the 30 yard line and getting out of bounds.
Rush for very little on first, and Romo gets nailed on 2nd and 8 in the backfield by Renaldo Wynn. 3rd and 14, and Jay Alford takes Romo down again, even with a holding penalty (that's obviously declined). Add another false start and we've got 4th and 26 for a punting down. Paulescu's kick goes into the end zone for a touchback, Romo's still "shaken up", as Al puts it. Meanwhile, Peter King sends a quick text: "R U OK?"
Tony Romo must have said something about Cory Proctor's sister because Proctor is just letting people go by him. - SSR
"I fingerbanged your sister, Cory. How d'you like that?" Or at least I imagine it goes something like that. Ward gets very little on first down to end the first quarter.
As we start the second, Romo has a "lower back contusion" and we're probably going to see Brad Johnson's old, slow butt in there. Brady James gets the sack on Elisha to start, Ward gets very little on 3rd and 17. Feagles punts to Crayton, who brings it out to the 32.
"Zak DeOssie forgot he was supposed to be on the field." - Al
"Have a punt with no snapper." - John
Tony Romo's questionable to return? Peter King (along with 80 percent of ESPN's staff) burst into tears upon hearing that. - Yet Another Idiot With a Music Blog
Romo just got pounded to the ground hard by Mathias Kiwanuka on first down. He's spent more time with his back on the ground or his ass in the air than....oh, fuck it, I can't finish the joke with anything that doesn't gross me out. Tashard Choice, the Rambling Wreck from Georgia Tech, rumbles for 22 yards to the Giants 42. Screen to Owens, he gets a few after avoiding the initial tackle.
"Years from now, there will be some kind of dinner between Jeff Garcia, Donovan McNabb, and Jeff Garcia. What do you think they'll talk about?" - Al
Romo goes whole hog, throwing deep to the sideline for Patrick Crayton -- and he's in the end zone for six! TOUCHDOWN, COWBOYS -- whoa, whoa, Giants say Romo crossed the line of scrimmage.
Yoko's boyfriend is coming back into the game. - James Craven
That's not fair to Yoko Ono. She at least had some discernible talent in the art world. I defy you to give me any area in which Jessica Simpson is talented -- and I'm not including in terms of beauty.
Touchdown stands, Nick Folk's XP is good, 7-0, Dallas. Peter King and all the Dallas-worshippers reach for the hand lotion.
Sinorice Moss takes the kickoff and runs into his teammate at the 19, where he gets pasted by a Dallas special teamer. Manning to Toomer to the 31 for a first down. Eli then goes to Kevin Boss on the left side, and he shakes a tackler for 24 yards to the Dallas 45.
Momma's Boys, Howie Do It,, moving Jay Leno to prime time. NBC is just admitting they have no new ideas whatsoever and would rather just run cheap programming instead of things people want to watch.
Ward gets 4 on 2nd and 5. Offsides penalty gives NY a first down. Another rush for a couple of yards around the corner, and Al just dropped a reference to an inside trader who got busted for a Ponzi scheme in NY this week. Clearly his time with Dennis Miller rubbed off on him as far as odd references go. 2nd down pass in incomplete, mostly thrown to avoid a sack, and Boss didn't see Manning. 3rd and 11. Eli hits T.O.S.S. for 15 yards and another first down.
Ware just made Kareem McKenzie look foolish, and gets his second sack of the night. Manning gets to Hixon at the 16 for the catch to get some of those yards back. Pass is off the hands of Kevin Boss, FG try coming up. Carney's kick is good, 7-3, Dallas.
Austin brings the ball out to about the 29. Romo runs it himself for a couple of yards, then throws to Witten for about 7 or 8 more -- just short of the first. A hands to the face penalty makes it 3rd and 11. Romo overthrows Witten, and Dallas will be punting. McQuarters makes the fair catch at the NY 37.
Manning misses Steve Smith on the first play, and hits him the next time on what appears to be damn near the same play, except T.O.S.S gets flagged for PI for it. Ward gets 9 on 2nd and 20. Two minute warning. Greg Ellis sends Manning to the ground for yet another sack in this game -- how many have we had? I think there have been at least five so far total.
The punt rolls all the way to the 13 yard line. Romo throws it a bit high for T.O. -- and it's gotta be high to overthrow a 6'5" dude. Illegal contact gets called on McQuarters, though. Another pass hit, they're out to the 30 or so. Romo then throws a one-hopper into the ground. Dump-off to Choice, who brings it back to the line of scrimmage. Tony scrambles and gets taken down short of the first down marker. That'll be halftime, folks -- Dallas up 7-3 as we end the first 30 minutes.
I'll have a halftime post up in a minute.
110 Comments:
Fucky fucky fucky now.
The Romo knob-slob projected count is set at 25. Anyone want to place their bets?
@SSR
I'd say that's a little low.
Andrea is Fantasying about Brady while talking to Romo.
Al: the over/under on the first T.O. Catch is set at 5:15."
And: "[Jerry Jones] can see the rainbow behind the tornado."
"The television shows of Dallas went off the air in 1991 but we have one of the best shows tonight. We've got everyone here but [presumably the cast of Dallas]" - Al Michaels
"The next to last game to ever be played at Texas Staduim." - Al Michaels
Call me when they play the last one next week. Then maybe I'll care. Though most likely not.
JFein, that game's on NFL Network. You gotta pay to see that one...at least with Comcast.
"one thing about Jerry Jones He sees the rainbow on the other side of the tornado." - Al gettin started early
HAHA! Owens dropped it and is booed. I laugh.
"He's a great receiver, but he does drop the ball. He doesn't catch it all the time." - John Madden
Show me a receiver who does catch every ball thrown to him and I'll show you my billion dollar fortune.
FYI, I'm being sarcastic.
I beat you to the "rainbow on the other side of the tornado" line, JG.
My dick just got MUCH bigger....1 inch long now.
@ jamescraven: I'm actually home and not at college for the next month, which means I have the luxuries of DVR, NFL Sunday Ticket, and the NFL-Network (which actually I did have at college, there are benefits to being in The Middle Of Nowhere, PA, one of them being I don't have to deal with Comcast.)
The Toyotathons of Toyotathons.
This year brought to you by the Department of Redundant Redundancy Department of Stuart Scott.
Just a heads up guys, I'm going to be live blogging tomorrow's MNF game at another site I contribute.....
The address is http://www.badnewsbloggers.com
No anonymous comments are allowed so Swearing Man won't be around.
All together now:
"Stay classy, Anon. 8:32 PM".
And the refs in cold weather black pants in 72 degree weather in Irving, Texas.
Running into the kicker has to be destroyed.
These guys do down faster than a Japanese hooker.
Al just completely made a mess of the penalty ruling and who should decline the penalty and now MY HEAD HURTS!
These new Levi's 501 ads are Jackass on crack.
Wow, "Howie Do It" looks like EPIC FAIL. Him trying to be a nicer version of that clown Tom Green... NBC must be desperate to put that and stuff like Momma's Boys on the air.
YAMWAMB, NBC's number four. The just don't give a fuck.
Whose face looks more like Porcelain: Tom Coughlin or Jerry Jones?
John could be a MMA announcer with his knowledge about Arm Bars.
Alfalfa channeling Austin 3:16 on this comment: "Ray Sherman, the [Cowboys] wide recievers coach going 'What?'"
What?
I like sex.
And stay classy classy classy now, Anon 8:15 PM.
And Anon 8:48 PM, there's a blog tomorrow with SSR in badnewsblogs.com.
Sorry, you're not invited.
Say something other than stay classy you dipshit faggot dickbrain.
@ James
Bad News Bloggers.....try again. ;-)
It will be the first live blog in the website's small history.
Thats not nice.
Hey, James Craven's D*** is Small:
Stay classy, you schmuck
You failed to say something other than "Stay Classy".....
And Romo goes down.
Good to see there are plenty of people with nothing better to do... err... talking about the Anon posters, not the regulars.
And the same to you too, James Craven Sucks @$$.
Besides, it's tradition here to treat anonymous troll posters with rude comments that way. As soon as the policy changes, with screening, this will no longer be a problem.
Tony Romo must have said something about Cory Proctor's sister because Proctor is just letting people go by him.
Nice of NBC to play "Headstrong" as bumper music. It basically describes the Cowboys right now.
@ Rob in WI, I see the Packers suck. Do you see them giving the Lions their first win on the last day of the regular season?
@Rob in WI: So AA oughta think about the anon posters getting screened from now on with all these "sexual predators" and go Chris Hansen on 'em.
@SSReporters: unless the Saints become the first victim, the chances are slim and none.
Ask Rick James Bible Owner about that.
@SSR... that was an ugly fucking game. I'm terrified that they might be the Lions' "1" in the win column.
@JamesCraven... meh... they're annoying but not nearly as amusing as the perverts on the Chris Hansen specials.
Oh, so Al Michaels didn't want to plug "Chuck" but had to do so, "as the promotion's department told me" to. Awesome. I'm sure he's already knocked back a few shots of Johnnie Walker in the booth.
The only thing I like about the new Geico ad is the "Somebody's Watching Me" dance cover they play. That cover is actually pretty good.
Tony Romo's questionable to return? Peter King (along with 80 percent of ESPN's staff) burst into tears upon hearing that.
Think T.O. will like Brad Johnson more than Romo?
Damn I am a cool fucker
Yoko's boyfriend is coming back into the game.
I did not say that 9:08 PM comment. Oh yeah I'm cool, but not in that way.
That woman in the Samsung commercial just a little pompous
GET ME THE DAMN BALL NOW !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yeah Tony, I think you should let Johnson play QB for the rest of the game.
That woman in that Samsung ad, jg, is a pompus, snot-nosed punk.
Wait... so we're comparing Jessica Simpson to Yoko Ono? For breaking up the Cowboys or NSync? And are either REALLY comparable to breaking up the Beatles? I'm confused.
I like playing with my johnson.
LEAVE T.O ALONE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The Cowboys, Rob in WI, and Cowboys detracters have named her Yoko Romo, even me.
I know, I set myself up with how I phrased my last comment on here, anon at 9:12.
You might as well erase everything I said in my last comment...
Aaron Ross sucks.....
Yah I could just see T.O. having dinner with Garcia and McNabb.
Looks like Romo is feeling better. Peter King must of Texted him saying "Everything will be just fine Tony."
I am damn sexy James
Alfalfa: "Walt Anderson to the hood."
*weak Lil John impression* Yeah, boyzzzzzzzzzzzzz!
This same challenge killed the Chiefs today.
@James Craven
I'm not sure that even Jessica can be blamed for a bunch of me-first players, a terrible head coach, and complete fucktard owner not performing to unreasonable expectations.
Why are we surprised that the Cowboys are falling apart?
And so Herm Edwards and Tom Coughlin channeling their inner Norv Turner with the unneeded challenge.
Think T.O. is now jealous of Crayton?
Well, Rob in WI, Jerry Jones thinks he's Al Davis calling plays and all. he's owner/president/general manager/defacto head coach and chief bottlewasher in Dallas.
I approve of that challenge
By gawd Jerry Jones made Barry Switzer a Super Bowl winning coach!!! Yee Haw!!!!
@S2N: Ashlee has less talent than Yoko Romo. She got caught lipsynching another song on SNL a few years ago and was booed in the Orange Bowl a few years ago.
Nice a movie about the greatest mass murderer in history debuting on Christmas day.
Peace on Earth
Tom Cruise playing a Nazi is about as believable as Tom Cruise playing a NASCAR driver.
@JamesCraven
But Ashlee has a new nose, so all will be better now. Especially now that she has offspring.
/bothered that I know all this.
What's nicer? How about a discussion on psychology and drugs with Matt Laurer and Tom Cruise, there's another whacko job that Scientologist.
An African-American Dallas cheerleader. The world really is ready for "Change".
Well 49er16, I refer to that picture he was in (Days of Thunder) as The Jeff Gordon Story.
According to Leno, GE (NBC's parent company) has the slogan "Imagination at work." NBC has adopted their own version of it: "Lack of imagination at work."
@JamesCraven
To be fair... the movie was before Jeff Gordon... Days of Thunder was supposed to be the Tim Richmond story, but they didn't want to go into the NASCAR Driver who died of AIDS.
That Jeff Gordon line, Rob in WI? Sarcasm.
Sarcasm detector was off... my bad.
how great was that pete carroll story on 60 minutes,
Can I get an "Uh-oh!" from Carl Lewis, Jim Rome is Burninating?
Now T.O. is going to complain that Romo and Whitten drew that play up in the sand.
T.O. is a whiny bitch.
Guys, in a 3-11 season, I'm proud to say that Gus Johnson will call the Jets/Seahawks, coach Walrus' final home game as head coach.
Oh, great 5 d-bags in the stupid "Guitar Hero" commercial.
Dear NBC,
I would like my Guitar Hero ads to have more Heidi Klum and less guys.
Thank you,
Rob in WI
@SSR
I thoroughly enjoyed Gus last week. But that was enough until College Basketball season REALLY kicks in.
The Berman drooling over Holmgren's final game has probably already begun.
"Gonna miss this place."
-John Madden about Texas Stadium. Ya sure you gonna miss the in-booth bathroom, John?
Hey, 49er16, I would not call Tony Hawk a douchebag.
He's more a douchenozzle!
Mike - I plan to watch it online after the game. Being a Southern California resident, I've read that story in local papers and magazines many a time.
However, Kobe and ARod are like, UBERdouchebags, so that more than covers for the Douchenozzleness of Tony Hawk.
@ Rob, much better than Vasgersian.
Today he was just terrible....he called TJ Duckett "Leonard Weaver" and called a gain that got no yards a gain of 2.
$5 FOOTLONG MUST DIE!!!!!
So SSr, you wanna kill off anything else?
any man who buys "Mamma Mia", even for a present for the lady, needs to turn in a Man Card at the register.
@SSR
I've been able to tune out most of Vasgersian's uselessness just from when he was the Brewers tv announcer 8 years ago. Well, that and the XFL.
Correction: Any man who buys Mamma Mia needs to turn their Macho Card at the register.
Needless to say, Rob in WI, his uselessness will befit the MLB Network come January 1.
SSR - leave the $5 footlong alone. That's my lunch at work most days. Best cheap fast food promotion ever.
"McQuarters bangs him down there." - Al Michaels
@ S2N, I am talking about the commercial.
Ah, OK.
@JC
If we could just find someway to put him and Kruk on the same network, I'd be happy not to watch them 7 days a week. And find some way to get HR back onto ESPN.
Chris Crocker just called.
She said "Leave the $5 footlong alone!"
Only Ryan Seachrest could host a show called "Mamma's Boys"
Seacrest is short.
Ask Joel McHale about that.
Ryan Seacrest just created the worst show idea in years....
Moma's Boy is something I'd expect to see on FOX. I guess NBC is running out of ideas.
And Seachest's stature isn't the only thing tiny if you know what I mean...so are the contestai in that as well.
At leasts the moms get some attention.
Oh wow, homoeroticism with Al and John talking about Barber "not being able to get out of bed for 2 days", tightening up, taking shots, not being able to walk, being sore, and all that, and for almost a minute straight. I wish I could have memorized it word for word, as it was that great.
That picture is deinitely the best thing about the Cowboys.
There is a great picture over on profootballtalk about tonight's game.