Hedo: Seriously JJ, that is the tiniest thing I've ever seen? And Dickie V wanted that?

JJ: Yep.

Hedo: How much for the little girl?

(Blues Brothers reference if anyone is wondering...)

Hedo: "Rookie! Once you finish clipping Dwight's toenails, you fetch Hedo drink, yes?"
J.J: "Yes, Mr. Hedo, anything you say."

No, no Hedo, please don't take my shirt off, I didn't take my bacne meds!

Hey JJ, Did you teach Greg Paulus how to flop?

JJ: Get away from me Borat!

Is funny - in college, you wear cutoff T-shirt under jersey when you play; in pros, you wear warmup over jersey because you no play. Is funny, no?

JJ: I am a basketball player for the Orlando Magic.

Hedo: No seriously little boy, we not do allow trespassers. SECURITY!!

Hey, I knew there was a fourth Beastie Boy!

Hey, remember the jump shot you had in college? Yeah. I didn't think so either.

Hedo: You have been traded white boy. Give me the warm up jacket now and no one is hurt. Too badly.

Hedo: There's still hope for you J.J. If Danny Ferry can win a championship so can you.

JJ: Aren't you from Constantinople?
Hedo: Its Istanbul not Constantinople.

"And so I said, 'Rectum? Damn near killed 'em!'"

I loved you in the Transformers movie!

"Hedo, for the last time, I'm not Bobby Hurley. I'm the overrated Duke player with a worthless pro career AND a DUI."

free vick - Bobby Hurley had a DUI as well - I was at the same bar as him that night (TJ Hoops for all you 1990's Durham residents). So 2 words for JJ: "Buckle up".

Reddick can't break the grasp of the most legendary Turk of all. Yes, Hedo IS Keyser Soze!

"Leave it on, JJ. We're only up 20. Still another 20 to go before you get in."

Doneycat - WOW. Serves me right for talking about stuff I'd only heard secondhand. I was just a wee lad at the time, so excuse my lack of awareness. The parallels, then, are pretty eerie.

Did Hurley write poetry too?

In my country, they would go crazy for someone that sucks as much as you do.

Hedo: Hey, I thought 11th picks actually take these off during games.

dük emmek

Translation: Duke Sucks

Hedo: Wait, you're still in the NBA?

C'mon, tell me I look like a Turkish Joey Fatone again, no?

In an effort to get more celebrities to come watch their games, the Magic allowed K.D. Lang to actually suit up for a game.

"Dude. A WWJD bracelet? Are you serious?"

Sometime, JJ, he show his vagine to my brother Hedo and say "You will never get this, you will never get this, la la la la la!", and he behind his cage, he crazy crazy, everybody laugh, he goes "You will never get this", but one time, he break cage and he 'get this', and then we will laugh, high five!

Hey towel boy can you grab me a gatorade and tell the blonde in section 109 to meet me in the tunnel after the game?

"J.J., you're pad's leaking."

"everyone thats not completely worthless on a professional sports team step forward...not so fast JJ."

You can do magic,
You can have anything that you desire.
Magic, and you know
Youre the one who can put out the fire.

"What is this..velvet? That is beautiful!"

"My friend doesn't like you. I don't like you either!"--Hedo

If you don't think that Turkoglu is the ugliest player in the NBA and a dead ringer for the guy that picks a fight with Luke at Mos Eisley, you are insane.

Trust me, you don't want out. Remember I was in Sacramento?

Hedo reminds JJ that to be a white star in the NBA, you must be from a European country.

Me start! You sit bench !

"hay hay dood. look at me I didn't go 2 colllege, but i still bedder than u"

At this point, I'd rather have Adam Morrison. He looks somewhat less like a tool.

JJ, scrubs don't get seats during timeouts. They have to stand so the real players can rest.

Hedo: "Hey! I thought I told you to stop leaving poems in my locker!"
JJ: "That's not what your sister said!"
Hedo: "Hey, bitch. When I say that you cry."

Hedo: "Hey you look just like this JJ Reddick guy that used to play college basketball. I wonder whatever happened to him?"

Hedo: Hey, JJ, are we still going to that lacrosse party after game?
JJ: Who the hell are you? Peja Stojakovik?

Be glad you're sitting the bench, the ravages of a starting job left me like this

AHHHH the wolfman's got me! oh, sorry hedo, won't happen again

The NBA; where gaying it up happpens.

"Thank god for Dwight Howard, am I right?"

"JJ, it's the third quarter. Why do you still have on the warm-ups"

Next, on a very special episode of Perfect Strangers...


OR

Hedo greets Jason McElwein on the Kings bench.

JJ...where are you going? The bench is that way!

Hedo: No, No JJ, you're not going in, it was an early April Fools joke. The only playing time you'll get is on XBOX.

JJ, coach wants me to play defense...can you believe that! By the way, take off my warmup...

Is that Vlade Divac?

Is that velvet, JJ? I would drape myself in velvet if it was socially acceptable.

Timmmaaay!

So many jokes, so little time.