"I'm the only one who got HGH shots? For 'misremembering' that, your ass is sleeping on the couch for the next month, buster!"

Throw me under the bus and you won't inject me with ANYTHING ever again!

In related news, Hollywood is in discussions with Clemens' management regarding a remake of the Billy Crystal-Danny Devito comedy, provisionally retitled "Throw Momma Under The Bus".



(Signed,
Bruce Strang)

Fucking dropped calls. If you only had Cingular two years ago, we wouldn't be going through this shit. Asshole.

Last...blowjob...ever...

"Remember that diamond that Kobe got his wife after Colorado, Roger? Bigger - but you know bigger, don't you..."

"This is what you get for not getting a better cell phone, you prick."

Ughhh, Roger would look so much classier in one of my self designed, "Jacket Happy" denim or leather jackets. For some odd reason I can't get him to wear one.

http://www.jackethappy.com/

Dammit Roger! I told you not to go back! Oh right, go ahead, blame the cellphone service

If I can only get him to take the Entenze.

I can't believe that the jackass who is tearing us down is McLovin's dad.

"lay all the HGH use on me huh? well tonight, the new york post's headline about where you take it is gonna come to fruition"

I bet I could kick Waxman's ass. I could park our Escalade in those nostrils, what a twerp.

Did I shave my back hair this morning? I can never remember...

lying muthafucka.....

I guess only one head grows when your on steroids, huh, Rocket?

In a universe where everyone appeared blurry and unfocused, Debbie Clemens had the answer.

Wait a minute, don't bring me into this! I'll tell them why you are really called Rocket! Just look at this unsatisfied face!

We agreed that you could sell me out and the best damn excuse you can come up with is a jumbled line about "misremembering"? Thank god I get at least half...

Tastelessness ahead:

Thanks to the HGH, my clit is bigger than his penis.

Lay off me I'm starving...

You couldn't possibly be less attractive than you are right now for acting like such a pussy.

"duh nuh nuh, duh nuh nuh. This is going to be on Sportscenter."

Clemens' wife's thought bubble:

mmm...I'd let that Arlen Specter Inject me in my rear.

"If he's pissed now, wait till he finds out that HGH isn't the only thing Brian injected in my ass."

Now is probably not a good time to tell him what else he injected in me.

Roger's wife: Hey Waxman, Call me!

Careful honey, If I can, congress can smell the Bullshit too.

Hey Roger, will you see if Brian has any more HGH on him. I feel like I could use another injection.

I also misremembered something I should have told you already .... I'm banging Andy.

Sadly, the affects of steroids on Mrs. Clemens resulted in both of them having a wang.

Kato Kaelin showed up for this hearing too? That man just can't stay away from the courtroom...

Oh, that 3 way with you, me, and Andy is SO off now.

If only he knew the needle wasn't the only thing Brian put in my butt in our bedroom.

Hey hunny, just give me the word and i won't play again......

Look at that head! It's like an orange on a toothpick!

Should I tell them that this bastard is bleeding through his pants RIGHT F**KING NOW!?!

This probably isn't the most appropriate time for Rusty Harden to be unhooking my bra.

Clemon's wife: Good thing McNamee just gave me a booster HGH shot before these hearings because I'm going strangle the shit out of Roger when we get home.

Did I turn off the iron?

Is that...is that hair gel?

I told Roger that I should have been the only one taking things in the butt.

Roger never asks for a second HGH injection at home.

I wonder if any notices this guy behind me is giving me an injection right now.

Debbie Clemens lists to the right Wednesday during her husband Roger's testimony before Congress. Mrs. Clemens was perched on an inflatable "donut" throughout the hearing, apparently due to an unexplained inflammation of her left buttock.

@bf- that's gold, Jerry, gold.

You told me those pills were Extenz Roger. I should have know.

Debbie Clemens leans forward to hide an erection of her newly developed penis. It's the pleat of the pants.

"Dick ..."

Honey, it's almost swimsuit season, I need more HGH

If I squeeze out a silent but deadly and someone smells it, I'm throwing that juiced up meathead under the bus.

"I really hope his ass isn't bleeding again"

Debbie: "I wonder if I should cancel those reservations at the Cooperstown Holiday Inn?"

Why is Tonya Harding sitting behind Roger Clemens?

I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue.

Hell hath no fury like a woman thrown under the bus by her husband at a congressional hearing on performancing enhancing drug use in baseball!

"You Kick his ass C-Bass!!!"

(what no Dumb & Dumber yet?)

Congressional Appearance Math

HGH/Steroids = Tiny (bottle) Rocket

Tiny Rocket = unsatisfied wife

Unsatisifed wife = the murderous rage she's barely containing behind your back

Psst.

Roger.

Sweetie.

Look at me.

I used HGH. Yes, your wife used HGH. Just surrender now.

OH Dear GOD Roger… Go ahead and spill the beans already before you implicate your WHOLE family!

Debbie: "I hope Sharon Stone will play me in the Lifetime movie on this".

I'm missing Oprah for this?