Freezing DVRs Can Be So Much Fun

Friday, October 31, 2008

We've come to another one of those pesky AA travel days when I'm unfortunately out of the loop for an entire day. Lucky for you, I've come up with the perfect post. Well scratch that, The Sports Hernia has. I give you Erin Andrews and a fourth grader....



Just look at the confidence the young buck exudes! If that was me in fourth grade, I would have peed myself around an attractive female like that. Good on ya, young man.

First grader manages to get Erin Andrews more excited than you ever will (The Sports Hernia)

When Rioting Goes Wrong

Thursday, October 30, 2008

I've never really understood the whole "riot when your team wins the Championship" thing. I get the partying and drinking in the streets side of it, but I never got the whole destruction of property bit.

Either way though, you can't help but laugh when an entire bus shelter collapses under the weight of celebrating fans....



Rock on Philly! I know it's about out of your system, and no one has been reported as dead....so yeah that's a good thing.

Esiason And Aikman Kiss And Make Up

Troy Aikman made an appearance on Boomer Esiason's MSG show last night and the two former QBs wasted no time in addressing the topic of their feud over the past few weeks. Via Barry Horn at the Dallas Morning News....

Boomer: "All right, joining us now is my new bias, I mean best friend, Troy Aikman from Dallas. First let me say this publicly Troy, in front of everybody: I do apologize for our little tiff about two weeks ago. I'm sure your week has been a little calmer than it was two weeks ago."

Aikman: "Yeah, you know it was a bit calmer and hey, I appreciate it. We both know we've been in the business long enough, we say things we regret, maybe wish we hadn't have. I will tell you though, for a couple of old, washed-up, has-been quarterbacks, it was kind of nice being back in the headlines again."

Boomer: "Yeah, it made us relevant, for all the wrong reasons, though."
Well isn't that special? See how boring things are when people are nice to each other??? Get back to talking trash and the accusations you two! Seriously though, I'm surprised that Aikman isn't holding a bit of a grudge because in the broadcasting world, the homerism claim is about as serious as it gets. He's a bigger man than I.

I'll also try and find the video at some point to see if there was actual kissing. Glad that's over....I can finally get some sleep.

Esiason to Aikman: "I do apologize" (Sports Media Blog)

Game Five Gets Good Ratings, But Rays-Phils Is Still The Lowest Rated W.S. Ever


It was a forgone conclusion that this World Series was going to be the low, but exactly how low? Even with the help of a 3 1/2 inning primetime game, that pulled a the 2008 out of the lowest rated spot in World Series history. The overnight total for last night's Game Five continuation was a 13.4 and when you average all of the game out the grand total should be around the low to mid 9.0's once all the numbers are collected. Not only is that .5 less than the previous low of 10.0 in 2006, but it obviously marks the first time a World Series averaged under 10.0.

I think the ultimate sentiment is that the World Series has just lost the overall luster that it once had. In fact even Peter Gammons thinks that it might be time to overhaul the entire October Event....

In the mid-'90s, several owners went to a Miami Super Bowl and discussed the notion of having a 10-day World Series at a neutral site. They'd have to get local fans to buy into destination and vacation packages. There wouldn't be the feel in Anaheim, San Diego or Los Angeles that there is in New York, Chicago, St. Louis or Boston. But then the Cardinals are the only team since the 2002 Angels to win in front of their home fans. It would be a hard sell, but the notion of a World Series week has some advantages.

May I suggest Punta Mita, Mexico? The Four Seasons would be a perfect headquarters hotel. Anguilla would work.

The World Series is, after all, significant television programming, and the good folks at Fox would love predictability. It's better than the official first dud of the fall TV season, "The Perfect Storm Hits the World Series."

There are a lot of questions that will be weighed after this, the worst World Series in memory. The first? With plummeting television ratings and the collapse of the economy, will the free agent market continue to inflate, or will it cool the market? The impact of this World Series may last right through into January.
Wow. That's pretty depressing. I don't know if something as drastic as Gammons is suggesting needs to be done, but something has to change. I personally enjoyed this World Series because of its overall randomness, both the teams involved and the 3.5 inning shootout, but the majority of Baseball fans don't think like I do. The "Winter Meetings" should be extra interesting come December.

Weather turns Series into worst ever (ESPN)
Rays-Phils Likely To Be Lowest Rated World Series Ever (Awful Announcing)

Create The Caption #303: Philadelphia Phillies Edition!

(Usually) Everyday I'll throw out a photo, you provide the caption, and then hilarity ensues. I'm also adding a handful of links at the bottom of the page that you should check out each day.

Tuesday's Winners....


"$100 for a tank of gas!?!? I can only afford to fill up 95,000 more times this season!"- Dingeraa3

"Tayshaun: Skis, huh?
Woman on other side: That's right.
Tayshaun: Great. They yours?
Woman: Uh-huh.
Tayshaun: Both of them?"
- Anon

"DEEE-troit GASSS-attendant!!!"- Anon

"Tayshaun Prince dresses in his most elaborate Halloween costume to date: "Kwame Brown - 2012""- G Anon (That's one of the funniest captions in quite some time. Bravo.)
_______________________________________

In honor of the NBA tipping off tonight, Are you funny enough to create a caption for this photo of Philly Fans rioting in the street after last night's World Series win?


Daily Links:



Bottle To The Head! (Deadspin)
Us Did It! (Cafe Press)
Charlie Manuel Is Awesome (Fightins)
Video Of The Kalas Call (700 Level)
Need Phillies Championship Gear? Rob A Bank! (Fanhouse)
Get Your World Series Rain! (Ebay)
Brad Lidge Is A Dominatrix (Sports Karma)
Riot Vids (Fan IQ)
A Thank You To Bud Selig (Josh Q. Public)
World Series Newspaper Headlines (HHR)
Baseball Is Finally Over (With Leather)
AWWWWWWWWW! (NBC)
Cole Hamels And His Wife Are Both Dreamy (Celebridiot)
Even More Attractiveness! (Uncoached)

Gus Johnson......RE-MIX!

It's been a long time since Gus Johnson had something to get excited about in regards to the Knicks. While my Wizards were busy losing to the f'ing Nets on their opening night, the Knicks were busy running and dunking over the Heat. In the second quarter, Gus lets out a huge "Hell Yes!" after a put-back dunk from Wilson Chandler, and the good folks at Tirico Suave decided to remix it for us....



Amazing. Obviously it's drawn out a bit long, but if you're following along with the photos and the beat....it's pretty well done. In fact, it is now my new ringtone. Hell Yes!

Gus Johnson Has Been Holding This In For Seven Years (Tirico Suave)

T.O. Is Seemingly Much Smarter Than Michael Irvin

Say what you want about Michael Irvin, but just like Sean Salisbury, he seems much happier since he left ESPN. Not only is he in a better mood, but his show in Dallas actually pulls some pretty big guests, and is actually interesting from time to time. On Tuesday nights Irvin also has a show called Inside The Huddle which airs on Tuesday night, and this past Tuesday's guest was Terrell Owens. DC Fanatic just happened to catch an interesting exchange between Irvin and T.O. during a commercial break, one where Irvin didn't realize his mic was still live....



If you couldn't tell what all that whispering was, Irvin was getting ready to pass along the intel that Jerry Jones is unhappy with Brad Johnson at QB, before T.O. stops him. The best part about the whole thing is that Owens is barely even paying attention while texting away on his phone and still has the sense to stop the Playmaker. No one ever said he wasn't smart!

T.O. and Irvin were awesome on Inside The Huddle tonight (DC Fanatic)

McCain And Obama To Interviewed On Monday Night Football


After all of their appearances on the network over the past few months, you just knew that ESPN was going to have the two candidates on right before the election. That last time will be on Monday Night Football and of course the game on election eve is in DC. Not only that, but you'll never guess who they've tabbed to interview them. That's right! Christopher J. Berman....

On the eve of the presidential election, ESPN’s Monday Night Football game November 3 will originate from the nation’s capital when the Pittsburgh Steelers meet the Washington Redskins. Before the polls open the next day, ESPN’s audience will hear from the candidates when Chris Berman interviews both major party presidential nominees, Republican Senator John McCain and Democratic Senator Barack Obama, during halftime of the MNF game.

The candidates will be on the campaign trail and have agreed to participate one-on-one, pending last-minute schedule changes, via satellite with Berman from the ESPN studios in Bristol, Conn. The conversations will be taped earlier in the day and will air at approximately 10:15 p.m. ET. The Steelers-Redskins game will kickoff at 8:30 p.m. on ESPN and ESPN HD with the Spanish-language telecast on ESPN Deportes.
I guess in the end these are the only interviews that actually make perfect sense for everyone involved. Especially when you consider the magnitude of the game itself. Not only is the Skins-Steelers game an important one for both teams, but it will also be important for the candidates. You see the last Redskins home game before the election is a predictor of which party will make it into office on Election Tuesday. When the Redskins win, the party who last won the popular vote wins the presidency, and when the Redskins lose, the other party gets the nod. In fact this theory has hold true a perfect 100% (17 of 17) since people first came across it.

That means if the Skins win, it's John McCain. And if the Steelers win, it's Obama. Choose who you root for wisely!

Gregg Popovich Looks Like Tom Hanks In "Cast Away" And Has A Sense Of Humor

I have no idea why Gregg Popovich decided to grow a creepy old man beard, but apparently it's given him some great ideas. Shaq recently called the coach a coward, and with the Suns and Spurs playing each other tonight, Pop got even though only way he knew how. By starting the "Hack-A-Shaq" tactic five seconds into the first game of the season. Via NESW Sports....



Hilarious! I could have done without double thumbs up move ala the Fonz, but at least Shaq got the joke and could laugh along with everyone else. The NBA....It's Fannnnnnntastic!!!

Pops pulls a Hack a Shaq joke during the game (NESW)

Go Nuts Philadelphia, Your Phillies Are 2008 World Series Champs

Wednesday, October 29, 2008


It was definitely an odd way to win it, but even in a three and a half inning romp, it's still a win. Here are the highlights from Philly's 4-3 win over the Rays to take the World Series, four games to one....



Just a great team and one that was built mostly with homegrown talent. Be careful out there tonight you Philadelphians and don't do anything I wouldn't do (that should cover just about everything).

World Series Game Five Live Blog: Round Two


Alrighty, we're trying this thing again folks. The game gets underway after the Barack Obama commercial and we're going strong for 3 and a half innings. Phils win, that's all she wrote.....Rays win, we're going back to Tampa for Game Six (presumably tomorrow). It's Game Five 2.0 on Fox.....NEXT!

The cheesy Oscar-like music is playing so that means just one thing, we're live from Philly! Joe Buck cues the intro with your highlights from the other night and we get to hear the word "hydroplaning" once again.

The fact that a POS infomercial delayed the start of a World Series game is a travesty. I could careless if it was Obama or McCain, but it's a shame a fricking political campaign commercial takes over America's pasttime. (Via Brett)

As someone mentioned in the pregame post, it didn't technically delay it. It really just got rid of the Fox Pregame show with Jeanne Zelasko. Ultimately that's not a bad thing. Chris Meyers is all decked out tonight with gloves and a gigantic coat. Nice look.

Let's get this thing (re)started. 25 years since Philly won a championship. Let's hope that drought ends now. (Via JFein)

Rain Delay: Forty Two Hours, Forty Six minutes. (Via James Craven)

Bottom of the Sixth:

Geoff Jenkins will be your pinch hitter and Ryan Madson will be coming into the game in the seventh for the Phils. David Price looks to be getting ready to warmup for the Rays. Annnnnnnd we're underway with ball one to Jenkins. Full count....JENKINS CRUSHES ONE OFF THE WALL! He's into second with a leadoff double. Rollins up....bunt....and a perfect one. Jenkins to third. Werth is your batter now and he gets up in the count 2 and 0.

"On a double, it will be louder." - Tim McCarver after Jenkins hit a double after McCarver said the place would be loud if Jenkins got walked. (Via J)

Pop up.......Iwamura can't get it! Phillies go up 1-0 3-2!!!!

As a prior poster in a prior live thread said best, "If we win, we riot. If we lose, we riot." (Via Jim)

That's all for Balfour as the Rays bring in Howell with Werth on first and Utley coming to the plate. Balfour is fuming in the dugout, as he should be. Chase takes two quick strikes and ends up striking out on a sweeping curve. Howard up and a pickoff attempt has Werth.....NO! He beats out the throw from Pena!!! Good hustle there. Doesn't matter though as Howard pops up to third.

One Hit, One Walk, One Run....3-2 Phillies.

For Fox dugout shots are the baseball equivalent of student bands. (Via Bazooka)

You think Ryan Howard loses "street cred" in Philly for endorsing the Subway cheesesteak instead of a local establishment? (Via Anon)

Yes....yes I do.

Top of the Seventh:

Navarro, Baldelli and Barlett coming up for the Rays. Nav goes down on an inside fastball and that's one out.

Baldelli up.....GONE! Rocco crushes and inside fastball and we're tied again just like that.

Can of spray paint: $5
Designer Sunglasses: $100
World Series directly behind home plate: $1000
Looking like an androgynous oompa-loompa on national television for over 2 hours: priceless
(Via Mr. Earth)

You can watch the game without announcers at MLB.com.
REPEAT: You can watch WITHOUT announcers at MLB.com.
(Via Matt)

That's amazing. Bartlett now lines a single off of Madson and here come those pesky Rays! A bunt moves him over to second and Madson is pulled from the game for JC Romero.

If Price comes in next inning, Joe Maddon should be fired for not knowing how to manage in a NL ballpark. (Via Brett)

Utley can't make the play at first....Bartlett heads for home! He's gunned out by the second baseman. Great play again from Utley and his fake throw might have caused Bartlett to go there.

Bottom of the Seventh:

It's high drama in Game 5 Version 2.0. Ratings be damned, this is the best thing on TV tonight. (Via Jim W.)

I'd argue that "Sons of Anarchy" is, but I'd be lying. It's close though. Burrell, Victorino and Ruiz are your batters. Howell is still on the mound.....Burrell kills one! Way back......off the wall!!! The wind kept in by an inch and slow ass Pat only ends up with a double. Bruntlett pinch runs for the Left Fielder.

I hope McCarver draws another gigantic arrow for us in the stands to show why Burrell's ball stayed in the park. (Mr. Earth)

OH MY GOD!!! BURRELL GOT A HIT!!! I DON'T BELIEVE WHAT I JUST SAW!!!!!! (Via JFein)

That's his first of the Series and Victorino will be batting against Bradford. Victorino misses on the bunt and he'll be swinging away now. He does and grounds out to the right side, moving the runner over. Great hitting there. Feliz up with a runner on third and one out....

SINGLE! Feliz delivers and it's 4-3 Phils!!!

Ruiz up....Sing....OH! Iwamura with a great dive and flip to Bartlett for the force out. Romero stays in the game to hit and grounds out to second. The Phils get the lead back though....4-3....6 outs to go!

McCarver: "The park is called Citizen's Bank Ballpark."
(CUT TO SHOT OF WHOLE PARK)
"If you hit the ball under the Citizen's Bank sign in left field..."(pause)
(NOTICE CITIZEN'S BANK SIGN CLEARLY IN RIGHT CENTER FIELD)
"...you'll hit it....away from the wind..."
(Via Adam)

He is just clueless.

Top of the Eighth:

Crawford up....single up the middle. Doesn't matter though....the King of Double Plays, BJ Upton, erases the hit.

This Game 5, with its roller coaster ride feel is eerily reminiscent of Game 5 of the 1980 NLCS. Ebbs and flows, ups and downs, highs and lows. (Via Jim)

Rocky is a great movie, but don't you think in general the theme is a little played out? C'mon fox, pick another song to play! (Via Anon)

Very much so. Pena up as both Price and Lidge warm up in the pen. Romero can't find the zone and the count is quickly 3 and 0. He follows up with a strike and then gets Pena to line out to left.....3 outs away!

Bottom of the Eight:

It could be just me, but the commercial breaks seem extra long tonight. I wouldn't put it past Fox to try and work some extra advertising in during the shortened night. Price in and the top of the order up for the Phillies. J-Roll tests the wind in left field and loses. One out.

Joe Buck gives us the official "Last Time Philly Won A Championship" jinx and Werth comes to the plate. He's down on strikes and Utley will be your batter. Chase gets on with a walk and Ryan Howard will hit with two outs.

Chris Myers with the William Penn swami angle. Comcast may have put Penn on top of their building, but they still can burn in hell in my eyes (and those of millions of others). (Via Jim)

Can a statue be 3 inches tall? (Via Mr. Earth)

I don't think it can, but whatever works right? Utley takes second after a nice jump it's 3-1 to Howard. Fouled off and it's a full count. Philly fans get loud, but Howard strikes out. Here we go Philly....Brad Lidge in....three outs away....

Top of the Ninth:

Enter Sandman....I'm just gonna leave now. News choppers are over Frankford and Cottman Avenues as I speak. (Via James Craven)

Godspeed James....Godspeed. Here it is. Longoria, Navarro and Baldelli to face Lidge.

Any guesses on how Joe Buck is going to ruin the moment if the Phillies finish it off here? (Via Jesse)

Longoria....pops out to Utley. One out. Navarro....singles to right field on a broken bat looper. One out and Perez pinch runs for Dioner. Zobrist is up and Perez steals second! Uh oh....

Zobrist smacks one! Right to Werth!!! Two outs and up strides Eric Hinske representing the go ahead run and he has a runner on second in Perez to drive in. One to go....

1st pitch....fouled down the first baseline. 0 and 1.
2nd pitch....check swing by Hinske....strike! O and 2.
3rd pitch....STRIKE THREE....

THE PHILLIES WIN THE WORLD SERIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

28 years after their last one they take it in one of the oddest ways possible, but it still counts. Joe Buck wisely lets them and the fans celebrate without his commentary, and it's going to be a long night in the City of Brotherly Love.

I'll have video and some more commentary in a few, but congrats Philadelphia....you certainly deserve it.

Final: Phillies 4 - Rays 3, Philadelphia wins the Series 4-1

World Series Game Five Live-Blog: Pregame


Okay folks, let's try this again. It's Game Five Version 2.0 tonight and it's a 3 and a half inning showdown with the Phillies having a chance to end this crazy thing. Just a reminder that tonight is also the night that the 30-minute Barack Obama infomercial is airing. If you don't want Politics getting all in your Baseball, then I suggest you tune in around 8:35 or so (I know that's when I am). Your particulars are below. Be sure to leave your predictions on the game and each managers moves, and I'll see you later on tonight....

Who: Tampa Bay Rays and Philadelphia Phillies
What: 3.5 innings of fury!
When: Tonight, 8:37pm (FOX)
Where: Citizens Bank Park - Philadelphia, PA
Why: So Bud Selig can postpone the game again and solidify his spot as the worst Commish ever.
Weather: It's going to be cold, and windy as hell

Conan O'Brien Is Upset With Gus Johnson

Great catch by Steph over at Fanhouse today. Conan O'Brien happened to notice that Texans receiver David Anderson used his signature "String Dance" following the score. While that only is hilarious, it's the commentary from Gus Johnson and Steve Tasker that the late night show host focuses on the most. Pay attention around the one minute mark....



Hilarious. I can't imagine that Gus Johnson hasn't watched Conan before, but he obviously didn't recognize the brilliance of the TD celebration. Hopefully this can lead to GuJo actually going on Conan, and even more people can be subjected to his brilliance.

Conan O'Brian Instructs Texans WR David Anderson on the String Dance (Fanhouse)

Your Pammy Award Winners And New Standings After Week Nine


Thanks to everyone who took the time to vote for the nominees from this past weekend. As expected, Gary Danielson racked up the points just in time to defend his title as we approach the end of the season. In other Pammy news, Ms. Ward herself just got an official endorsement from the Washington Post's Leonard Shapiro! Shapiro goes so far as to say that Pam Ward is, "always prepared to the max, knows her Xs and Os inside and out and sets up her analyst partners beautifully." He's even championing for her to get better and more important assignments!

We should be so lucky. Here are your winners and your new standings....

10. "Kansas, right back in this football game." - Andre Ware, after Kansas ties it up. They were only down 7-0 before that.

9. "Alabama rolling over the Volunteers of Texas 22-3." - Wendi Nix

8. "No more playing it safe! You got to go for it here" - Gary Danielson before a 3rd and 11

7. "Knowshon Moreno, he's like a karate expert or something. He uses your force and pings off it." - Gary Danielson

6. "When you watch Tiger Woods, you're in awe of what he can do with a seven-iron. Watching Matthew Stafford from up here, he's head and shoulders above most college quarterbacks." - Gary Danielson

5. "This is why going for it on 4th Down is a terrible idea when you fail. You turn the ball over." -Doug Chapman

4. "The Badgers with the lead." - Pam Ward, going into commercial, as Illinois is up 7-3.

3. "These balls are coming out in a few seconds!"- Brad Nessler

2. "We're actually double-fisting on Kansas and Texas Tech over here." - Rob Stone

1. "I dont know who's happier, Mr or Mrs Stafford. If that keeps up there might be a little Matthew coming." - Gary Danielson


Standings After Week Seven: 1. Lou Holtz (58), 2. Pam Ward (50), 3. Gary Danielson (42), 4. Mike Patrick (35), 5. Mark Jones (21), 5. Brad Nessler (21), 7. Bob Davie (20), 8. Brent Musburger (18), 8. Charles Davis (18), 10. Petros Papadakis (16), 11. Bob Griese (15), 11. Andre Ware (15), 13. Ray Bentley (14), 13. Kirk Herbstreit (14), 13. Paul Maguire (14), 16. Sean McDonough (10), 16. Todd Blackledge (10), 18. Tom Hammond (9), 18. Rob Stone (9), 20. Pat Haden (8), 20. Brock Huard (8), 20. Verne Lundquist (8) 23. Gary Dainelson (7), 24. Joe Tessitore (7), 24. Alex Flanagan (7)

Others Receiving Votes:
David Norrie (6), Doug Chapman (6), Jesse Palmer (5), Ed Cunningham (5), Ron Franklin (4), Craig Bolerjack (4), Terry Gannon (4), Dave Pasch (3), Dave Archer (3), Wendi Nix (2), Rod Gilmore (1), David Diaz-Infante (1)

Your Week Nine Pammy Nominees (Awful Announcing)
The Pam Ward Chronicles: Week Nine (Awful Announcing)

Frank Caliendo Is Everywhere!

Overall, the first broadcast of the new season was a good one for TNT (I could do without some of the new graphics and sounds), but there was one thing I forgot to consider. TNT is part of Turner Sports, which also has TBS, which MEANS....more f'ing Frank TV spots and commercials.

Being a glutton for punishment, I decided to tune in for a brief second during the show last night, and I came across the most unbelievable minute in television history. After a skit on Frank TV, Frank Caliendo threw it to a commercial which was for Frank TV. Not only that, but the very next commercial was a Caliendo-Dish TV spot! I know it has nothing to do with announcing, but it blew my mind so much, that I just had to share it with you....

video


Again, I know this has nothing to do with Sports, and I KNOW that I'm just giving the show more press, but Turner's insistence on hanging its hat on Caliendo continues to amaze me. God bless the guy for making as much money as he can with his schtick, but I just can't take anymore. With that said, you have my word that this is officially the last post ever on Caliendo or Frank TV on this site. I also apologize for stealing a minute of your life with that clip.

Let Them Play! Let Them Play! Game Five Is On!!!


MLB has just announced that Game Five will be played tonight promptly at 8:37pm and who cares if it's under 40 degrees and winds are upwards of 25mph?! We're getting this thing in! The Phillies will be batting in the Bottom of the Sixth and only do they have the advantage of getting twelve outs to the Rays nine in this thing, but Cole Hamels is the first scheduled batter of Game Five-Version 2.0. Charlie Manuel will obviously get a pitch hitter in the game but it gets interesting from there.

Joe Maddon will go probably "keep" righty Grant Balfour in the game, which will could bring Matt Stairs or another lefty out of the Phillies dugout. Maddon could essentially just walk right out there and bring in any left handed pitcher that he wanted to face Stairs. Manuel also has a big decision for the top of the seventh and that's whether to bring in Brad Lidge, who hasn't played much this Series, right away or save him until the eighth. It's unlikely he would go with him that early, but it's certainly possible. The possibilities for the start of this game are endless!

The more you think about the moves and decisions in this 3.5 inning contest, the more you realize how unprecedented this whole situation is. Bud Selig is a dumbass, but he really lucked out with his decision to delay the game. The ratings should be good, and if the game goes extras, FOX will be kissing his ass for the rest of his days "in office". The Live-Blog picks back up at 8:30pm tonight....BE THERE!

Game Five of the 2008 World Series to be resumed tonight (MLB)

Who The Hell Put That Cart There?

I keep forgetting to tune in for Tuesday night Football on ESPN, but I know now that it's a must watch every single week. Last night Rece Davis, Mark May and Lou Holtz were on the call of the Houston-Marshall game and witnessed one of the worst Sports injuries ever.

For some reason, a douchebag employee at Marshall decided to park a random cart right behind the endzone and Houston Receiver Patrick Edwards ran straight into the thing. You don't notice it at first, but you see just how bad the injury is during the replay....



Well how'd that sit with your lunch? I love how Lou is wondering WHAT is in the carts, and not WHY the damn things are there in the first place.

NFL Broadcast Maps And Announcing Schedule

With any luck the World Series will be pushed back until Sunday so we don't have to deal with Joe Buck back on Football. I'm not ready yet! Alas, that's virtually impossible with the last two games being played in a dome and we'll get Buck and Troy Aikman on the Cowboys-Giants game. On the other side of things, Nantz and Simms are being sent to Buffalo for the Jets-Bills game. CBS just has a terrible set of games and they really had no other choice.

Here's your maps and schedule thanks to the The 506 ....

NBC Sunday Night Football: New England at Indianapolis
ESPN Monday Night Football: Pittsburgh at Washington (Mike Tirico, Ron Jaworski, Tony Kornheiser)

FOX 1pm:















RED:
Green Bay @ Tennessee - Kenny Albert, Daryl Johnston, Tony Siragusa
BLUE: Detroit @ Chicago - Sam Rosen, Tim Ryan
GREEN: Arizona @ St. Louis - Thom Brennaman, Brian Billick
ORANGE: Tampa Bay @ Kansas City - Ron Pitts, Tony Boselli

FOX 4pm:















RED:
Dallas @ NY Giants - Joe Buck, Troy Aikman
BLUE: Philadelphia @ Seattle - Dick Stockton, Brian Baldinger
GREEN: Atlanta @ Oakland - Matt Vasgersian, J.C. Pearson

CBS:
















RED:
NY Jets @ Buffalo (1pm) - Jim Nantz, Phil Simms
GREEN: Houston @ Minnesota (1pm) - Dick Enberg, Randy Cross
ORANGE: Baltimore @ Cleveland (1pm) - Kevin Harlan, Rich Gannon
YELLOW: Jacksonville @ Cincinnati (1pm) - Gus Johnson, Steve Tasker

BLUE: Miami @ Denver (4pm) - Greg Gumbel, Dan Dierdorf

Your NBA Announcing Schedule, A New TNT Basketball Commercial And More!

Tuesday, October 28, 2008


Wanted to get a post up (get it?) on all things associated with the NBA's opening night this evening. Below are a few links, your NBA Announcing Schedule for the rest of the week and also your first look at the new NBA on TNT commercials that they'll be airing this Fall. Make sure you check out the new look NBA TV tonight starting at 5pm and then TNT's pregame gets underway at 7pm. ESPN resumes their NBA coverage on Wednesday with NBA Shootaround starting at 7pm as well.

Here's the schedule, some links and the new TNT commercial staring none other than AA's featured man of the day, Charles Barkley, and Senator and Actor....Fred Thompson!

Announcing Schedule:

Tuesday, October 28th

NBA Tip-Off 2008 (TNT, 7pm)- Boston Celtics Ring Ceremony
Cleveland Cavaliers at Boston Celtics (TNT, 8pm)- Marv Albert, Reggie Miller, Mike Fratello and Craig Sager
Portland Trailblazers at LA Lakers (TNT, 10:30pm)- Kevin Harlan, Doug Collins and Cheryl Miller

Wednesday, October 29th

NBA Shootaround (ESPN, 7pm)- Stuart Scott, Jon Barry, Avery Johnson
Phoenix at San Antonio (ESPN, 8pm)- Mike Breen, Mark Jackson, Jeff Van Gundy, Lisa Salters
L.A. Lakers at L.A. Clippers (ESPN, 10:30pm)- Mike Tirico, Hubie Brown, Heather Cox

Thursday, October 30th

NBA Tip-Off (TNT, 8pm)- Ernie Johnson, Charles Barkley, Kenny Smith and Chris Webber
Houston Rockets @ Dallas Mavericks (TNT, 8:15pm)- Marv Albert, Mike Fratello, Reggie Miller and Cheryl Miller
New Orleans Hornets @ Phoenix Suns (TNT, 10:30pm)- Kevin Harlan, Doug Collins and Craig Sager

Friday, October 31st

NBA Shootaround (ESPN, 7:30pm)- Stuart Scott, Avery Johnson, Jalen Rose
Chicago at Boston (ESPN, 8pm)- Mike Breen, Mark Jackson, Jeff Van Gundy, Doris Burke
San Antonio at Portland (ESPN, 10:30pm)- Kevin Calabro, Jon Barry, Nancy Lieberman

Reading Material:

Field report: NBA Tip-Off Celebration, New York City (Ball Don't Lie)
While You Were Sleeping VII: The FreeDarko EVERY GAME PREVIEW (Free Darko)
The NBA finally has its curves back (Bill Simmons)
SLAM’s Official 2008-09 NBA Preview (SLAM)
Poor Kobe Bryant, the Video (True Hoop)
Celtics Begin Title Defense with Playoff Rematch (Celts Blog)
Game 1 Preview: Blazers vs. L*kers (Blazers Edge)
Superman Don't Need No Robin (Cavalier Attitude)

TNT's New NBA Spot:

video

Danyelle Sargent Speaks To Dan Patrick About The Singletary Interview

Good work by the Dan Patrick Show in getting much-maligned FOX sideline reporter, Danyelle Sargent, on the horn today to explain the whole Singletary interview gaff from Sunday. Sargent explains that she actually meant to refer to the call that the 9ers Coach made to Walsh when he decided to get into coaching. In a nine minute interview, she also talks about Francesa's decision to air the clip, her f-bomb at ESPN, and how the video actually got out.

Here's the audio if you want to take a listen....

video


You just have to believe that the whole thing was just one giant mistake, and I feel for her the day after. Also, even though Francesa says he didn't know it was a taped piece, you have to think someone at WNBC knew that they weren't using a live clip, and I still think that's a dirty move.

Hopefully Sargent can get an apology from WNBC and move on from this whole mess.

Sargent explains Singletary mishap (Dan Patrick)

Charles Barkley Kicks Off The NBA Season In Controversial Style


You know it's NBA time when I have two Charles Barkley nuggets in one day. This one is actually far more crazy than the first though. Charles and Kenny Smith were in NYC for a TNT luncheon and the TNT analyst was apparently not holding back one bit.

Not only did the "Round Mound of Rebound" say that Portland is overrated, that Patrick Ewing is rolling over in his grave (in reference to the Knicks) AND that he "never understood ‘off the record,’ you can’t just say crazy sh*t and then say it’s ‘off the record’", buuuuuut he also shared not that funny joke about rumored ODer, Isiah Thomas. From Newsday via The Sporting Blog....

In discussing ways in which the Knicks should be improved this season, Barkley said, "I think they have a better coach. This coach probably won't try to kill himself."

When that indelicate reference to Isiah Thomas' recent hospitalization prompted nervous laughter from reporters during an informal lunch yesterday, Levy reminded Barkley that the session was on the record.

Barkley, usually not one to shy from potentially insensitive remarks, seemed to sense his attempt at humor had crossed a line. "That's my fault," he said.
Ouch. Suicide and death is just something that you should never joke about. At least he apologized, but according to SLAM, he didn't necessarily slow down. He cursed and joked throughout the media's questions, and even hinted that Nielsen Ratings are racist. The guy just doesn't have an off switch, which can be both good and bad, and yesterday it was certainly bad.

Be sure to check out the rest of the luncheon highlights via the SLAM link below for more curse world fueled fun!

Boo! Knicks Too Scary For TNT (Newsday)
Charles Barkley: At Least the Knicks Have a Coach Who 'Won't Try to Kill Himself' (The Sporting Blog)
Links: Lunch with Kenny and Charles (SLAM)

No Game Five Tonight


Just a quick post, but for those of you hoping for a closeout of Game Five tonight are out of luck. MLB has officially suspended play until at least Wednesday at the earliest and that the hopes for getting a game in tonight are out of the question. Via NBC in Philly....

Phils phans will have to wait at least another night to complete Game 5 of the World Series.

A wet, muddy field logo tells the story of Game 5’s rain delay.

Major League Baseball has announced that Game 5 has been delayed until Wednesday.

The announcement was made as the Philadelphia area continued to be pounded by rain, wind and even snow in some areas.

Rain and wind suspended Game 5 between the Phillies and Rays in the middle of the sixth inning on Monday night.

Whenever the game continues the Phils will be coming to bat with the game tied 2-2.
Well that's a bummer. I can't imagine the agony that Phillies fans are going through right now, and I have to think it's just the opposite for Rays fans at the moment. The longer this gets drawn out, the better it is for Tampa. This is also good for the NBA who's season tips off tonight. Without a World Series game on, Sports fans are sure to head over to TNT tonight for their doubleheader.

MLB: No Game 5 Tuesday (NBC)

FYI- There's also no word on ratings from last night's water-logged game, but I'm sure it's not going to be a good total. I'll try to get that number to you as soon as I come across it.

Create The Caption #302

(Usually) Everyday I'll throw out a photo, you provide the caption, and then hilarity ensues. I'm also adding a handful of links at the bottom of the page that you should check out each day.

Yesterday's Winners....


"Big bucks! Big bucks! No whammies, no whammies and....stop!"- Harvey Bars

"But I can't teach you my swag
You can pay for school but you can't buy class
School of hard knocks I'm a grad
And that all-blue yankee is my graduation cap..."
- RJBO (A little Jay-Z for your afternoon)

"No, I don't want no scrubs. A scrub is a guy that can't get no love from me."- Anon (And some TLC!)

"The Carlton Dance was never the same after Alfonso Ribeiro hit that growth spurt."- Ross

"LeBron demonstrates to AA what he does to the Wizards every Spring."- G Money (Well played my friend....well played)
_______________________________________

In honor of the NBA tipping off tonight, Are you funny enough to create a caption for this photo of Tayshun Prince pumping gas in Detroit?


Daily Links:

R.I.P. Dean (Red Sox Monster)
Vegas Is Screwing Some Bettors (LVRJ)
Ben Zobrist's Dad Is Not Having Fun In Philly (The Fightins)
Singeltary Gets His Own Song (Ryan Parker)
Halloween Sports Costumes (Front Of The Net)
Lebron And CP Practice Their High Fives (NESW Sports)
Selig Is At It Again (Moon Dog)
How Did Mike Brown Destroy The Bengals? (Meaningful Collateral)
The Iron Ref Finals Are On (HHR)
An Old NASCAR Vet Endorses Obama (From The Marbles)
Who's Replacing Ty Willingham? (The Sports Point)
Replay Gone Wrong (Awful Officiating)
Steve Phillips Does Not Amuse Karl Ravech (Deadspin)

The Jon Miller And Joe Morgan Breakup Is News To Miller

I don't necessarily think that Bob Raissman would make an item like this up, but the more I try to figure out if the Miller-Morgan Breakup is going down, the more I find that it doesn't seem to be true. The latest bit of info comes from Miller himself who said yesterday on ESPN 710 in Los Angeles, that he hasn't heard a thing about the move. Via Sports by Brooks....

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“The ESPN people, one of the executives, called me on Friday and said a reporter had called him an asked him about that, to let me know it was out there. He said ‘we thought it was kind of ridiculous because you both have it in your contract that you have to do Sunday Night Baseball. I don’t know the TV network can do whatever they want. Nobody said anything to either one of us about it.

“I don’t think there’s anything to it. But who knows? I’m not going to worry about it as long as they continue to pay my contract. With the stock market the way it is I’m going to be very content to get paid whether I do the games or not.”- Jon Miller

The two have been together for 19 years, and seem happy working together, so I really don't see this coming to fruition. With Miller not calling for the split, ESPN would be admitting that Joe Morgan isn't right for their number one team, and I don't see that happening. Well....they did just bench Stephen A. Smith, but at least S.A.S. seems to care about the Sport he covers. It should be an interesting offseason.

Miller And Morgan No Nothing Of Their Demise (Sports by Brooks)

ESPN Nixes Yet Another Sports Guy Move


I can't imagine it's fun to be Bill Simmons right now. I mean sure he's successful, has a nice family and is more than likely a millionaire, but his employer is seemingly shooting down his every idea. First, we had the odd summer where he started blogging over at his personal blog (which has a total of 10 entries), so he could write what he wanted to. Then it was ESPN saying that he couldn't interview Barack Obama on his podcast, and the network eventually putting him on every single outlet. Well now it seems that ESPN isn't letting Simmons join a Fantasy Basketball league.

Does anyone remember that random website, Christian Sings The Blues (Extremely NSFW!), that broke the Wilbon-Kendra Wilkinson photos? Sure you do. That site's owner was invited by both Simmons and ESPN Fantasy Guru, Matthew Berry, into an NBA fantasy league and the thought of a porn star in one of their leagues did not sit well with ESPN. From CSTB (Again...extremely NSFW!) via The Brockett Blog....

Oh and finally, Bill Simmons, the Sports Guy, sent me an email tonight. He basically apologized for the fact that due to the graphic and adult content on this blogsite, that ESPN wouldn't let him and Matthew Berry let me into the league. He also said that ESPN chopped off the part where he stated this fact on his podcast yesterday.

Man, what a downer. I guess I understand, but it still sucks...."I coulda been a contender!"
I guess it's ESPN ultimately just covering their collective ass, but it doesn't really seem like a big deal. The network just doesn't appear to trust Simmons these days, and I wonder how the Sports Guy feels about that recent four-year deal right about now. Good times.

The F'ing Dungeon And Lisa Sparxxx? (Christian Sings The Blues)
ESPN and porn evidently don't mix (Brockett Blog)

Barkley Says He's Running For Governor In 2014


With all of the time he's spent in and around the presidential campaign this past year, you knew it was just a matter of time. On CNN last night, Charles Barkley told Campbell Brown that he was indeed running for office in 2014 in the state of Alabama. Via The Hill....

"I plan on it in 2014," Barkley told CNN's Campbell Brown on Monday.

When asked if he was serious, the former Philadelphia 76er said, "I am, I can't screw up Alabama."

He added that his native state could only improve. "We are number 48 in everything and Arkansas and Mississippi aren't going anywhere," Barkley said.

He said that his top priority as governor would be education. "The public school system in this country is the worst it has ever been and what that does is that hurts crime, it hurts the judicial system," he said. "You know if you don't give people education and hope, they become criminals. They get involved in drugs. So we have got to fix the public school system."
Well you can't say he's wrong about that. I'd hate to see him leave TNT for office, but if that's what his ultimate goal is, you can't really stand in his way if he wants to serve his home state. I still think that he doesn't know exactly what he's getting into, but with the right people around him, hopefully he can do some good in Alabama.

Charles Barkley To Run For Alabama Governor in 2014 (The Hill)

Your College Football Announcing Schedule For Week Ten


So we've made it to Week Ten and it's shaping up to be a Texas-Penn State Championship game unless Texas Tech has anything to say about it. Georgia and Florida should also be a heated contest after what went down in the endzone last year, and there even some good Big East games on the contest. Other than that, I've made a pact with myself to not watch anymore Big Ten or ACC Football, so that about sums it up.

Here's your schedule for Week Ten with assistance from The 506 once again....

Tuesday, October 28th

Buffalo @ Ohio (ESPN, 7pm)- Ari Wolfe, Jim Donnan
Houston @ Marshall (ESPN, 8pm)- Rece Davis, Lou Holtz, Rob Stone

Thursday, October 30th

23 South Florida @ Cincinnati (ESPN, 7:30pm)- Chris Fowler, Jesse Palmer, Craig James, Erin Andrews

Saturday, November 1st

Wisconsin @ 21 Michigan State (ESPN, Noon)- Pam Ward, Ray Bentley
Northwestern @ 17 Minnesota (ESPN2, Noon)- Dave Pasch, Andre Ware
Air Force @ Army (ESPNU, Noon)- Dave Armstrong, Larry Coker, Todd Jones
Michigan @ Purdue (BTN, Noon)- Wayne Larrivee, Charles Davis, Charissa Thompson
Central Michigan @ Indiana (BTN, Noon)- Mark Neely, Glen Mason, Chris Martin, Anthony Herron
West Virginia @ 25 Connecticut (Big East Network, Noon)- Mike Gleason, John Congemi, Quint Kessenich
Miami @ Virginia (Raycom, Noon)- Steve Martin, Rick Walker, Mike Hogewood
Kansas State @ Kansas (FSN, 12:30pm)- Drew Goodman, Dave Lapham, Jim Knox
Auburn @ Mississippi (Raycom, 12:30pm)- Dave Neal, David Archer, Dave Baker
San Diego State @ Wyoming (MTN, 2pm)- Tim Neverett, Akbar Gbaja-Biamila, Anne Marie Anderson
18 Tulsa @ Arkansas (ARSN PPV, 2pm)- Scott Inman, Jimmy Dykes, Clint Stoerner
Pittsburgh @ Notre Dame (NBC, 2:30pm)- Tom Hammond, Pat Haden, Alex Flanagan
Fresno State @ Louisiana Tech (KAIL, 2:30pm)- Ralph Wood, Randy Rosenbloom
Hawaii @ Utah State (ESPN Plus, 3pm)- Trey Bender, Doug Chapman
Arkansas State @ 2 Alabama (CTSN, 3pm)- Chris Stewart, Tyler Watts, Barry Krauss
6 Georgia v 8 Florida (CBS, 3:30pm)- Verne Lundquist, Gary Danielson, Tracy Wolfson
Iowa @ Illinois (ABC, 3:30pm)- Sean McDonough, Chris Spielman, Rob Stone
15 Florida State @ Georgia Tech (ABC, 3:30pm)- Brad Nessler, Bob Griese, Paul Maguire, Stacey Dales
Iowa State @ 9 Oklahoma State (ABC, 3:30pm)- Ron Franklin, Ed Cunningham, Jack Arute
24 Oregon @ California (ABC, 3:30pm)- Terry Gannon, David Norrie, Todd Harris
Temple @ Navy (CBS College Sports, 3:30pm)- Tom Hart, Trev Alberts
Clemson @ Boston College (ESPNU, 3:30pm)- Doug Bell, Charles Arbuckle, Melissa Knowles
North Texas @ Western Kentucky (ESPN Plus, 4:30pm)- Sam Smith, Doug Graber
20 Brigham Young @ Colorado State (MTN, 6pm)- James Bates, Todd Christensen, Roger Bailey
Washington @ 5 USC (FSN, 6:30pm)- Barry Tompkins, Petros Papadakis, Jim Watson
Tennessee @ South Carolina (ESPN2, 7pm)- Mark Jones, Bob Davie
Louisville @ Syracuse (ESPNU, 7pm)- Clay Matvick, David Diaz-Infante
11 Boise State @ New Mexico State (KTVB/Aggie Vision, 7pm)- Mark Johnson, Tom Scott, David Augusto/Jeff Siembieda, Danny Knee
Nebraska @ 4 Oklahoma (ESPN, 7:45pm)- Mike Patrick, Todd Blackledge, Holly Rowe
1 Texas @ 7 Texas Tech (ABC, 8pm)- Brent Musburger, Kirk Herbstreit, Lisa Salters
13 Texas Christian @ Nevada-Las Vegas (CBS College Sports, 8pm)- Carter Blackburn, Aaron Taylor
Alabama-Birmingham @ Southern Mississippi (CSS, 8pm)- Bob Neal, Chuck Oliver, Allison Williams
Tulane @ 19 Louisiana State (TigerVision PPV, 8pm)- Doug Greengard, Rene Nadeau, Kevin Guidry
10 Utah @ New Mexico (MTN, 9:30pm)- Rich Cellini, Jon Berger, Blaine Fowler, Toby Christensen
Arizona State @ Oregon State (FSN, 10pm)- Steve Physioc, Jason Sehorn, Michael Eaves

November 2:

East Carolina @ Central Florida (ESPN, 8pm)- Joe Tessitore, Rod Gilmore

(Photo via SI's Cheerleader of the Week collection)

Danyelle Sargent's "Bill Walsh" Gaffe Was Used In Violation By Francessa


Okay, now this makes soooo much more sense. The Danyelle Sargent interview, in which she asked Mike Singletary about a phone call to his deceased mentor Bill Walsh, was never supposed to see the light of day. It was actually a taped piece (which explains her pause after the mistake), and was taken from something called an "open feed" that is used by various news organizations. Via the SJ Mercury News....

Fox producers were understandably mortified and didn't air that portion of the interview. (Interestingly, the "pregame" interview aired after the opening kickoff Sunday, and although it was taped, it could have left viewers with the impression that Singletary was talking to a reporter instead of coaching.)

But the clip was part of the "open feed" that live telecasts use and that news organizations can access for clips and highlights. Mike Francesa, host of New York station WNBC's "Mike'd Up," showed the gaffe late Sunday night.

Dan Bell, Fox's vice president of communications, apologized for the error but said it should have been left on the cutting-room floor.
So here's what happened. Francesa actually used an unauthorized clip from a taped segment and completely made it look like something that went down live. I still think someone working in Football should know if Bill Walsh is alive, but if it was a fixable mistake (which it obviously was), Sargent shouldn't have been embarassed on National Television like that. Bell also issued the following statement that I think sums everything up perfectly....
"We've filed a complaint with the league of them using this. It's unauthorized footage. It's footage that was recorded but that never made our air. If we saw that on a CBS game, we're not going to take that and have one of our stations run with it."
That's a pretty slimeball move by Francesa and WNBC now that the truth is out there, and as I should have mentioned yesterday, there's no one with more dumbass comments and mistakes than Francesa himself.

My apologies to Ms. Sargent for raking her over the coals yesterday, and thanks to JS for sending along the whole story.

Update: Mike Francesa was finally reached for comments and he replied that he was, "unaware it had not been broadcast by Fox. Obviously a mistake was made. If we'd known that, we wouldn't have used it"

Fox reporter's Bill Walsh gaffe wasn't supposed to make the air (SJ Mercury News)
Wait, So It's Wrong To Ask A Guy About A Phone Call He Had With His Dead Mentor? (Awful Announcing)

Game Five Officially Suspended Until Tomorrow Night, Or Longer

Monday, October 27, 2008


Well that throws a wrench into things doesn't it? Game Five has been officially labeled as suspended and it won't be finished tonight. The game will be picked up in the same spot tomorrow (weather permitting and it doesn't look good) thanks to a Carlos Pena single in the Top of the Sixth, and here is the explanation of why the league suspended the game from COO Bob DuPuy....



I'm sure all Philly fans just want to try and end this thing tonight, but with the way that field was starting to look, the decision was ultimately the fairest for all parties involved. I'll pick the live-blog up whenever the weather lets us get this thing in. Geesh.

World Series Game Five Live-Blog


I can't remember the last time I live-blogged a Baseball game, but we're going to give it a shot tonight. Hopefully I don't bore you too much and I can keep your attention for the better part of the game. I'll also be flipping over to Football when there's a break, so keep those updates coming if you're watching the game. It's the Rays, It's the Phils....and it's on Fox....NEXT (or around 8:35pm after Daryl Hall sings the National Anthem)!

Alright. Joe Buck is on camera giving his whole "no one thought the Rays would be here" speech for the 15th time this Series, so that means we're about ready to get going. McCarver just mentioned that Maddon has moved Crawford up into the two spot, which is seemingly where he should have been all postseason.

28 years Philly! Are you ready?

Stat of the night: The rays are 0-6 when the temprature is below 50 degrees. As posted on FOX, the game time temprature is 44 degrees. (James Craven)

This pregame music is definitely less than inspiring. (Anon)

It really is. It's like the Oscars music, only nowhere near as good and even more annoying. Rocco Baldelli is on lineup duty and has to deal with a damning "Rays in World Series: .187 Team Avg" graphic. That's not good at all.

"The Ford Keys To The Game" are for the Phils to not let up, and for the Rays to get big hits early and "rise from the ashes". Do people even read this stuff before they write it?

Top of the First:

Cole Hamels gets Iwamura on a flyout, Crawford on a groundout and Upton on a groundout. That was quick...one, two, three.

"Cole Hamels may never have this chance again."- Tim McCarver

Huh? It's not like he's Jamie Moyer. The kid is 24!

How many times are we going to hear the "Rocky" theme tonight? I say atleast 5 times. (Via Anon)

Am I having a stroke, or did Tim Macarver just start speaking a completely different, hitherto unknown or unheard of language? (Via Anon)

It's very possible.

Bottom of the First:

Donovan McNabb is on the Phillies lineup complete with some money glasses. Joe Buck correctly points out that Donovan was poked in the eye during yesterday's game. Kazmir falls behind to J-Roll but gets it back full with a close call on the inside. Rollins then flies out to left.

Tony Kornheiser just made a really bad joke where he said "The Titans haven't been in the spotlight in a long time for something that didn't involve Elvis impersonators." Kill me now. Buck/McCarver, or Kornheiser? Choices... very bad choices. (Via Anon)

Ugh....I'm almost glad I'm missing that thing. Werth draws a walk with one out and Utley is coming to the plate. Kazmir decides to hit the second baseman and that brings up Howard with 2 on and 1 out.

"They had the worst record in baseball last year, we've worn out that stat" - Joe Buck (Via JFein)

Howard falls behind and K's on a fastball on the inner half. Kazmir is working it in there at 94mph now. The hitless ladies man, Burrell is your batter now. Patty draws a walk and Shane-O-Mac is at the plate with the bases loaded and two outs.

Line drive and Victorino drives in two! 2-0 Phils.

Feliz up and he rips a pitch straight back. He was all over that fastball. Pedro follows that up with a line drive single to left, but he hit it too hard for Steve Smith the 3rd Base Coach to send Burrell. Bases Loaded again....

McCarver says the Rays should get someone up in the pen, but Ruiz flies out. Cue the Rocky Theme! 2 Runs, 1 Hit, 1 Walk, 1 HBP....2-0 Phillies.

Why can't Fox find any other music besides the damn Rocky theme? (Via 49er16)

WHY DOES TONY KORNHIESER NEVER TAKE A SICK DAY!?! (Via Frank T. Tank)

He did earlier this year actually.

"In many ways, it is easier to hit a pitcher when he is wild." - Tim McCarver (Via JFein)

"Kerry Collins steps up in the pocket, and he can still stroke it." - Ron Jaworski (Via SS)

Top of the Second:

I don't think the Simpsons "Tree House of Horrors" commercial has been played as much as the Frank TV spot on TBS....but it's close. Pena tries to bunt his way on and hits it right to Ryan Howard and that's immediately followed up with a flyout by Longoria. Navarro draws a two-out walk and Baldelli will be your batter....He pops out to Utley and Cole Hamels is flying through the top of innings tonight.

At this point, "Eye of the Tiger" would be welcome relief. (Via Rob in WI)

Amen.

Bottom of the Second:

Hamels, Rollins and Werth due up, and that pitch count for Hamels sits at an amazing thirteen through two innings. Cole goes down on three pitches....one down. Victorino, who's mic'd up, talks to Werth about the wind and that can't be fun to deal with tonight. Rollins then flies out to right field on cue, but it's not a problem for Baldelli.

@ AA: I'm pretty sure the Family Guy commercial with Stewie high on soda has been played as much as the Frank TV ads. (Via JFein)

Touche.

To make things interesting, they should have switched out McCarver and Kornheiser for these 2 games. I mean, a Kornheiser/Buck Duo??? Could it get any better? And McCarver could say the same exact things he would be saying in the baseball game and still would make just as much sense! (Via Keith)

I think my head would explode if that actually went down. Werth is battling with Kazmir and has the starter up to eight pitches before singling to left. Great at-bat. That gets Utley to the plate with two outs. Pop up....no damage done. Still 2-0 Phillies after two.

"I think that 4:00 tomorrow would be a good time for you to stop by a Taco Bell." - Joe Buck admitting even he doesn't like Tim McCarver

Hahaha....that one actually made me laugh out loud. Indy just got a TD (Manning to Clark) and they're up 7-3 nearing the end of the first.

Top of the Third:

Hamels mows gets Bartlett to groundout and has Kazmir and Iwamura left to deal with this inning. Joe Buck is annoying with me his whole "check on ______" schtick, whenever someone grounds out. I'm also getting annoyed with the whole FOX sponsors thing in the middle of the inning. I haven't noticed them missing a pitch yet, but it's certainly distracting.

"He really does himself a favor by throwing strike one." - Joe Buck (Via J)

Thanks Captain Obvious. Iwamura gets a single up the middle and there goes your no-hitter. Crawford up and he ground the first pitch right to Utley. Howard, Burrell and Victorino are up next half inning.

Bottom of the Third:

Credit where due: I think that kind of "behind the scenes" thing, having the umps mic'd and talking about the first base line is one of the better things Fox Sports does...The other of course is scooping Chris Mortenson. (Via Rob in WI)

I certainly agree. Hamels up to a whopping 33 pitches through three innings. Howard strikes out on three straight pitches and he looks to be struggling with the lefty on lefty matchup tonight. Burrell pops it up to Baldelli for out number two and Victorino follows with a K of his own. Finally a quick inning for Kaz.

0 Runs, 0 Hits, 0 Errors.

I submit the Holidy Inn Express commercial with Cal and the fake security guard who needs to be punched in the face as the beisbol Fox Caliendo. (Via Rob)

Yes, yes...that one too.

Top of the Fourth:

Upton, Pena, Longoria due up for the Rays. Buck tells us that rain is picking up and looking at the map, that should be the last of it for the night. Upton grounds to short.

"Honest, thoughtful and straight."- Tim McCarver on Joe Maddon

Now what does his sexuality have to do with anything, Tim? Pena crushes one of the wall and that's a double for the Ray. Longoria with a shot now with one down.

His leap was there but his windage was off."- Tim McCarver on Werth's attempt at catching the ball.

What the hell is "windage"?!?!?

Longoria singles past Rollins and Tampa is on the board....2-1 Phils.

A 6-4-3 double play off the bat of Navarro ends the inning. 1 run on two hits and no errors.

Bottom of the Fourth:

Bottom of the lineup coming up for the Phils and the rain has really started to pick up now. Feliz goes down and Kaz has five Ks now....

"I think the Titans need to win this game more because they're a small market and if you dont they stop talking about you." - Kornheiser

Why is that a bad thing? Ruiz laces one to left field and Hamels is coming up with a runner on first and one down. Hamels tries to bunt and oh no!!!!!!!! It hits his pitching hand! Doesn't appear to be bothering him on the next pitch though as he bunts it back to Kazmir who guns out Ruiz running to second. Hamels gets a coat and will be on first with one out.

"It appeared to hit the knuckle and not the tip, which would be better for Hamels. You would think."- Tim McCarver

Really, Tim? Really??? Rollins up....and good lord do those fans have to be miserable right about now with that cold, rain and wind. Ugh. Rollins walks and there's two on with two out and Werth coming to the plate.

Hamels hit in the pitching hand. Philly collapse in... 3....2.......1.... (Rob in WI)

If they stop this game because of the rain. Do you think Buck finally goes crazy? (Via 49er16)

I'm praying for it actually. McCarver tries to explain the difference a 4-seam and 2-seam fastball and I think I actually just became a little dumber trying to listen to that. 3-2 to Werth....fouls it off. 3-2 to Werth....fouls it off. 3-2 to Werth....walk. And the bases are loaded. Hickey comes out to visit with Kazmir and Utley will be your batter.

Damn, what an at bat by Werth. (Via JFein)

Seriously. A ten pitch at-bat in this weather, and with two outs, can only cause Kazmir more control problems. Scotty Kaz is all over the place now and it's 3-1 (the one strike being a ball that Utley swung at). Ooooh....Kazmir gets a close call on the inside which Fox Trak shows was actually a strike. 3-2....Utley hits into the shift and the Rays get out of the jam.

Top of the Fifth:

Rain, Rain and more Rain. Baldelli up and the outfielder pops up behind third.....WHOA! The wind picks it up and Rollins can't get it!!! That's an error for the shortstop. Bartlett comes to the plate now with Baldelli on first and no one out.

Damn Candlestick and Wrigley winds thinks that was brutal. (Via James)

The error doesn't matter though as Utley completes a great double play by tagging Baldelli and flipping to first. Amazing concentration there. Kazmir strikes out and that's your inning. The hand doesn't seem to be bothering Hamels much.

Twelve to go. (J Craven)

Jinnnx. Jinnnnnnnnnnnnx!

Bottom of the Fifth:

"All of a sudden, a domed stadium doesn't seem like a bad idea."- Tim McCarver

Ummmm....are they normally considered bad ideas? Tim is all over the place tonight. Howard walks on four straight pitches and Buck throws to Chris Meyers for a weather report.

"I have to sit down. I'm blocking someone's view I think."- Chris Meyers

7-6 Colts at halftime. (Via SS)

Phillies Fans don't care about your dumb update, Meyers! Burrell up and he takes a strike to start off the at-bat. If I were either of these teams, I'd start trying to hit fly balls because that wind ain't slowing down. Pat B takes a sure strike that isn't called and it's 3-2....foul ball. 3-2....foul. 3-2....foul. 3-2....Low! Another walk and that'll do it for Kazmir. That was another strike that Kellogg didn't call and the Phils are in business with a new pitcher coming in.

Never understand why they don't do this. But, I'm sure there is a Fox affiliate in Philly. Why not bring on the weather man to give an update on the situation so people watching the game know what is going on. (Via Alex)

Hmmm good idea.

I'm sure Jillian would do the weather update. (Via 49er16)

And I'm sure I'd let her. Balfour is in and so is the grounds crew to work on the infield. Maddon is also out there checking on his new pitcher and we got a shot of Joe and Tim in the booth, which is complete with a giant hippie tapestry of the World Series logo. Nice touch. Victorino comes up after what seemed like a 20-minute delay and to reset....Howard on 2nd....Burrell on 1st....nobody out.

Victorino tries a drag bunt and that goes foul. Shane then pops up to Crawford....should have stayed with the bunt. Feliz up now and he proceeds to crush a pitch foul and then another straight back....0-2 and Feliz pops up on the infield to Pena who has trouble....but makes the catch. Buck and McCarver start talking about some "Fair Catch" rule and I'm pretty sure it's actually called the "Infield Fly Rule" in this Sport.

A fair catch rule in baseball? Who knew? (Via James)

2 down and Ruiz with the last chance to drive the runners in. Carlos pops it up and Balfour is pumped....2-1 still and I'm guessing we're going to get a delay any second now.

"The weather has taken the routine part of the game out of the routine". - Tim McCarver (Via J)

Top of the Sixth:

We get our first look at Ken Rosenthal tonight and the kid has an umbrella, an overcoat and gloves on while standing right outside the dugout. Grow a pair, Kenny! He's talking about CBA's and Umpire agreements so I'm tuning him out now. The Phillies are now getting the extra special treatment from the ground crew and we're still waiting for the start of the sixth.

They do realize that if they just play the game instead of having 20-minute delays every 5 minutes, they would finish the game faster. (Via JFein)

If I could redo my Venn diagram from earlier today, I would give Joe Buck his own circle off in the middle of nowhere. But I felt my eyes would explode if I had to see that I'd taken the time to write both his and McCarver's names on the blackboard. (Via Dante)

I love me some Venns! Hamels is finally ready to go with Iwamura coming up. Every other pitch is a bad one for Hamels, but he has the count to 2 and 2...and the crowd tries to come alive. STRIKE THREE! That one was outside but Hamels gets the call and Buck points out the inconsistency at the plate. Crawford grounds out to Howard and there's two down. Upton up....and he gets an infield hit as Rollins juggles the ball on what would have been a tough play.

TOUCHDOWN COLTS!! Dallas Clark, 14-6. (Via SS)

Is MLB trying to become the NHL? They are really trying to destroy baseball. I'm waiting for them to call the game because of rain so the Phillies clinch in a game that goes less than 9 innings. (Via Captain Redbeard)

There's no way that Heir Selig would let that happen. They'd HAVE to play the whole thing. McCarver is saying that the weather is "robbing" the Rays of their talent, and I'm sorry....but those are the breaks. Mother Nature is a part of Baseball and if you can't run because of a wet field, then oh well. That's why teams water down infields all the time.

Hamels is throwing over to first on every play now, four in a row actually, but it doesn't matter....Upton walks into second base. A basehit will tie it, and Hamels is still worried about Upton.

Just heard a "fuck" from a titan o-lineman after a false start. Yay for ref's open mike. (Via JFreak)

"You would need a moat to get to second." - Joe Buck
"Hydroplaning has come to baseball." - Tim McCarver

"I don't know how a crowd this soaked can make this much noise."- Joe Buck

28 years, Joe....28 years.....

Pena singles to left....Burrell with the throw....NOT IN TIME! Upton scores and we're tied at two!!!

Longoria swings through a changeup but Ruiz misses it and Pena heads to second. He's in scoring position now but Longoria flies out. Well that was a crazy inning wasn't it? Onto the Bottom of the Sixth with Hamels, Rollins and Werth coming up.

Bottom of the Sixth:

Titans just scored on a LenDale White run and got a two point conversion to tie it. Not sure why they went for it in the third, but they still got it. 14-14.....

****AND WE HAVE AN OFFICIAL RAIN DELAY****

Meyers is talking with Bob DuPuy now and it's not looking good for us to finish this thing tonight. He does however say that the game would be picked up tomorrow in the same spot because Tampa Bay tied it up in the top of the inning. If they hadn't of scored that one....this thing might be have been over. Wild.

Well I'm going to try and wait this thing out, but it's looking like a wash at this point (pun intended). I'm going to get the DuPuy video up underneath here and then see if I can't pick up on the Football game for a short, 4th quarter live-blog.

Hahaha....just caught this on CBS' Live Scoring of the game and it made me laugh....

43°F - Light rain. Mostly cloudy. Nippy. Wind: 15mph/NW