The Pam Ward Chronicles: Week #2

Saturday, September 08, 2007


Welcome back to our weekly installment of The Pam Ward Chronicles. I'm going to be keeping track of the Announcing Quotes throughout the day and I ask that you join in. Please leave any that you come across in the comments.

We are in for a treat today folks! Our good friend Pammy is kicking off today's action at 11am....nice and early. We're also starting the Chronicles is weekend with some gems from Chris Spielman during last night's Navy-Rutgers game. It might be tough for someone to beat him, but we'll see....

College Football Week #2 Announcing Teams (Awful Announcing)
The Pam Ward Chronicles: Week 1 (Awful Announcing)

Both teams pride themselves on being intelligent football players.”- Chris Spielman

The linesman called that from all the way across the field.”- Chris Spielman
“Well he’s the HEAD linesman.”- Craig James
“He’s the Head EYESman.”- Chris Spielman

If his shoulders are pointed at a 45 then it’s a pass.- Chris Spielman
You’re telling me you played in the NFL and you ran angles?- Craig James
You were a junior before you knew what a 45 degree angle was.- Sean McDonough

"The Defense has been getting a lot of credibility, a lot of publicity I mean...more airplay than the Mary J. Blige song this week."- Desmond Howard

Just because....


Please eat something Erin....we are all concerned.

"Yeah where they're going to get into is the last five games in that Big East schedule. When they take on the like of Rutgers, Louisville, Pitt.....and......Connecticut."- Ray Bentley, Umm UConn? Really???

"Andre, we talked about the hardware, which is the physical, and the software, which is the mental aspect of the game."- Dave Pasch (Via Signal to Noise)

"...having a lot of distractions, then having to go into LSU for a game, that's just deadly."- John Saunders (Via Anon), Okay that's just bad.

"If you don't get moist watching it, well, I don't know what to tell you. It's a moving film."- Ray Bentley (Via Signal to Noise)

Seriously, what's with them plugging that DVD the whole game? That's about the 5th mention.

"Arrington went AIRborne to pull that one in"- Brad Nessler

"Which one would you be Paul"

"I'd be the Money"

"I guess that makes Griese the sexy and me the dirty"

- Brad Nessler (Via Matt)

"The office package would shrink tremendously".
"We've got a small package just for him".- Brad Nessler (Via Anon)

Announcer reading some fans painted during the New Hampshire-JMU game....

"We've got an O, a U, a K....what does that spell?- Mr. Announcer Guy (It's actually Dukes)
"I think that's a D and it spells Dukes."- Mr. Analyst Guy

"Tomatoes weren't around when Paterno started here."- Mike Patrick (Via Signal to Noise)

"That's not even a dead cat bounce, that's no bounce at all."- Todd Blackledge (Via Phil)

I heard this one live too.....what the hell does that even mean? Is that some old saying from 1912???

"Dead cat bounce" is a term used by stock traders. My wife used to be a trader at Charles Schwab and she was impressed by that usage.A dead cat bounce is when a stock falls like...oh...Michigan's football program then goes up a skosh when bottom feeders buy it. So that's a very nice analogy! Well challenged, Blackledge!!!!- smed

Well then.....good work Todd. I take it back.

"Well, save me a beer there, Lisa, I'll be down in a few minutes." - Brent Musberger (Via Signal to Noise)

"As the kids say in pop culture, Moreno is NOW. He's now." - Mark Jones (Via Dirk Diggler)

Posted by Awful Announcing- at 11:20 PM

38 Comments:

Spiels is great. Dumb, yes, but hilarious.

GMoney said...
Sep 8, 2007, 11:42:00 AM  

That disturbed me. Her arms are freakishly skinny.

Erin, please eat a sandwich. I'm concerned.

Signal to Noise said...
Sep 8, 2007, 12:19:00 PM  

ewww she does look gross :(

Anonymous said...
Sep 8, 2007, 12:27:00 PM  

ewww she does look gross :(

Anonymous said...
Sep 8, 2007, 12:27:00 PM  

Marshall has a second string RB named Chub Small. I'm waiting for Pam Ward to talk about penetration on one of his rushes.

Signal to Noise said...
Sep 8, 2007, 12:29:00 PM  

Did Jesse Palmer just have to extend his ABC-Bachelor contract or did he have to rework a new deal?

makeitstick said...
Sep 8, 2007, 12:43:00 PM  

Jesse was recently hired to become the Craig James 2.0.

Andre Ware is just awful

Rob said...
Sep 8, 2007, 1:41:00 PM  

Erin I have a great cheese burger sitting right next to me calling your name

-Brett

Anonymous said...
Sep 8, 2007, 1:47:00 PM  

Guys Erin only eats at Tapas places in Atlanta

Rob said...
Sep 8, 2007, 1:49:00 PM  

Hahaha touche' Rob.

Sep 8, 2007, 1:54:00 PM  

Dave Pasch: "Andre, we talked about the hardware, which is the physical, and the software, which is the mental aspect of the game."

I get it, but it was stupid.

Signal to Noise said...
Sep 8, 2007, 2:00:00 PM  

During halftime of the UM/OU game, John Saunders was talking about Virginia Tech "...having a lot of distractions, then having to go into LSU for a game, that's just deadly."

Anonymous said...
Sep 8, 2007, 2:02:00 PM  

Saw EA just before the second half again, and I can't believe I'm saying this...but she looks kinda fug.

Please bring the real EA back. What have you done with her, ESPN?

Signal to Noise said...
Sep 8, 2007, 2:02:00 PM  

Pammy just chimed in on the preview of the Boston College - NC State game by saying that "Oh, he should get an ovation," in response to being asked whether NCSU head coach (and ex-BC HC) Tom O' Brien should get an ovation or be booed.

Stop drinking the Rumplemints in the booth, Pammy. They f'ing HATE TOB at Boston College. They hated him before he left for Raleigh and it certainly isn't like they're going to cheer him for leaving now. Of course, you would have to follow college football to actually know that.

Bstone said...
Sep 8, 2007, 2:07:00 PM  

Talking about the impending DVD release of We Are Marshall:

"If you don't get moist watching it, well, I don't know what to tell you. It's a moving film." - whatever the chode working with Pammy's name is.

Signal to Noise said...
Sep 8, 2007, 2:15:00 PM  

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA. What an unbelievable choice of words. How did I not hear that.

By the way, I think I've seen two consecutive sideline interviews/reporting pieces where they didn't show Erin Andrews on TV at all. They never waste an opportunity to do that, so maybe she really is anorexic or something.

Bstone said...
Sep 8, 2007, 2:18:00 PM  

Yes sir! He just confirmed what everyone thought about Pam Ward!

Mookie said...
Sep 8, 2007, 2:18:00 PM  

mookie - Freudian slip.

Signal to Noise said...
Sep 8, 2007, 2:19:00 PM  

Wake Forest at the 5.

"Get strapped in, this flight's about to take off!"
-Andre Ware

Two plays later: Interception.

Thanks, Andre. Thanks.

Sheep's Line said...
Sep 8, 2007, 3:13:00 PM  

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=4577479965544764503&hl=en

Love Boat said...
Sep 8, 2007, 4:21:00 PM  

Bill Land: Intelligent fans here at College Station.*

*Denotes first time statement said. Ever.

Sheep's Line said...
Sep 8, 2007, 4:37:00 PM  

Bob Griese: He doesn't go down when you think he goes down.

You're such a tease, Mike Hart.

coach Elliot: He doesn't go down when you expect him to.

Who'da thought Mike Hart would have something in common with every girl I dated my freshman year of college?

Sheep's Line said...
Sep 8, 2007, 4:50:00 PM  

Talking about Dirty Sexy Money...

"Which one would you be Paul"

"I'd be the Money"

"I guess that makes Griese the sexy and me the dirty"

- Brad Nessler

The simmering homoeroticism in this booth (going back to last week) is just phenomenal

Matt said...
Sep 8, 2007, 5:04:00 PM  

Bob Griese: What do you call it when two ducks fight?

Sheep's Line said...
Sep 8, 2007, 5:18:00 PM  

looks like michigan's season is really going down the tubes....

Anonymous said...
Sep 8, 2007, 5:47:00 PM  

When did Bonnie Bernstein get two tickets to the gun show?

Signal to Noise said...
Sep 8, 2007, 5:49:00 PM  

"The office package would shrink tremendously".
"We've got a small package just for him".

I think it was Nessler.

Anonymous said...
Sep 8, 2007, 5:59:00 PM  

"Tomatoes weren't around when Paterno started here."

- Mike Patrick

Signal to Noise said...
Sep 8, 2007, 6:33:00 PM  

Discussing Michigan bouncing back this week. "That's not even a dead cat bounce, that's no bounce at all."

Phil said...
Sep 8, 2007, 6:48:00 PM  

"Dead cat bounce" is a term used by stock traders. My wife used to be a trader at Charles Schwab and she was impressed by that usage.

A dead cat bounce is when a stock falls like...oh...Michigan's football program then goes up a skosh when bottom feeders buy it.

So that's a very nice analogy! Well challenged, Blackledge!!!!

Smed said...
Sep 8, 2007, 7:21:00 PM  

Not a quote, but remember when they said Jimmy Clausen had a better first start than Lebron, Crosby, and Tiger because he threw for like 50 yards?

Phil said...
Sep 8, 2007, 7:55:00 PM  

Georgia vs. South Carolina [Right after Knowshawn Moreno 49 yard run in 3rd quarter]

"As the kids say in pop culture, Moreno is NOW. He's now." - Mark Jones


Way to shill for the network, Jonesy.

Dirk Diggler said...
Sep 8, 2007, 8:01:00 PM  

Stacey Dales showing some cleavage. Nice reporting in the sense that I had no idea what she said but she looked pretty doing it.

Dirk Diggler said...
Sep 8, 2007, 8:12:00 PM  

Bob Davie (on UGA linebacker Danell Ellerbe):

"He had some problems last year. He was literally in the dog house."

(literally, Bob?)

Anonymous said...
Sep 8, 2007, 8:59:00 PM  

"And that might just do it." -Mark Jones, South Carolina-UGA game.

When he said this, SC had the ball up four with six seconds left and a four point lead. UGA had no timeouts, but apparently some hope of winning.

Vegas Watch said...
Sep 8, 2007, 9:28:00 PM  

@ Signal to Noise

She's been dating Rick Ankiel for the last four years.

Bstone said...
Sep 8, 2007, 9:32:00 PM  

"Well, save me a beer there, Lisa, I'll be down in a few minutes." - Brent Musberger.

Last week he was looking for pot and adult beverages on Tightwad Hill, this week reserving a beer at an LSU tailgate.

Signal to Noise said...
Sep 8, 2007, 11:31:00 PM  

Brent Musberger just called a tiger a "puppy". It may looselybe a kitten but a puppy? I think he's drunk on bourbon he's talking faster than Glenn Geffner on Red Sox radio broadcasts.

Steve said...
Sep 8, 2007, 11:44:00 PM  

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