The Pam Ward Chronicles Week 11

Saturday, November 10, 2007


Welcome back to our weekly installment of The Pam Ward Chronicles. I'm going to be keeping track of the Announcing Quotes throughout the day and I ask that you join in. Please leave any that you come across in the comments or feel free to email me at AwfulAnnouncing@Gmail.com.

Sorry for the lack of Pammy goodness last week. I'll make it up to you today my friends. Join me won't you?

Your College Football Announcing Schedule: Week Eleven
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"They might even consurm some drinks."- Chris Fowler talking about the Ephs on Gameday

"Extend it like Beckham"- Andre Ware

That's dirty Andre

"That's what I like, Hubbard catching the ball with his hands."- Andre Ware

"Michigan can get exotic with its offense here." - Andre Ware (Via S2N)

"...and you end up running your quarterback into the hole, it's almost like having ten blockers out there"- Andy Gresh (Via Steve)

Almost Andy....almost.

"You can't return a muff."- Dave Pasch

This is a dirty dirty crew.

Sorry for the delay.....internet and cable went out for some reason. I should be good for the rest of the day.....email me if I missed anything.

"That spells NFL on Sunday"- Andre Ware As opposed to NFL on Wednesday? Thanks for clearing that up. (Via Matt)

"That's their largest bulge in the game" - Eric Collins (Via Mookie)

"If one Wells runs dry, try another one." - Brad Nessler (Via Anon)

Very cheesy Bradley

"They say he's money, but he almost left some change on the table with that kick." - Gary Danielson, as the Auburn kicker sneaks in a field goal. (Via S2N)

"If I'm Georgia, I'm gonna ride my hot guy right now." Gary Danielson (Via Gangsta D)

Now we're cooking!

"And he is going to be dragged down by Will Smith, I mean Will Davis"- Brad Nessler (Via Matt)

Uh Brad....he's on the Saints.

"He would have had to pull a Louganis to avoid diving into Cox." - Verne Lundquist, as a UGA player gets called for roughing the passer. (Via S2N)

"That was a free play. The third down play was a free play for Tress because he knew if he didn't hit it on fourth down he was gonna go for the first down."- Bob Griese

Umm what?

"That's not the first time I've seen him lit up" - Bob Griese in reference to Paul Maguire's mug being lit up above Ohio State scoreboard (Via jonef)

I don't know if that was a stoner comment or a football one. Either....pretty funny.

"Lingerie on the field!" - Verne Lundquist, after Knowshon Moreno scores for Georgia. (Via S2N)

"Now they've lost a 14 point lead again a highly aroused Florida State team."- Bill Curry

"Juice has matured into a fine wine right before our eyes." - Brad Nessler (Via S2N)

"Just throw it up to the 6 foot 3 Johnson" - Dan Fouts (Via Mookie)

Ah, there's the third grade humor we were missing today. Bravo Mookie.

"He forwarded it forward" - Tim Brant (Via Mookie)

"The mental errrror leads to a BC Touchdown."- Dave Lamont A follow up to Chris Spielman's "analysis" of BC's choice to hand the ball to the fullback on 1st and Goal from the 6, and then again on 2nd and Goal from the 1. Spielman's analysis was simply, "Grrr, Grrr, Grrr." (Via Phil)

"That's a big kid." - Mike Patrick
"Yeah." - Todd Blackledge
"That's a Todd Blackledge kind of body." - Mike Patrick
"That is not. No. Sherry Blackledge probably wishes that was a Todd Blackledge body."- Todd Blackledge
(Via The Unreliable Narrator)

God...they are comedy gold.

UVA color analyst Frank Quayle, after pbp man Mac McDonald inadvertently called UM the Dolphins: "That's an insult to the Hurricanes, Mac." (Via Bruce)

Now that's funny.

"You know the best advice I've heard all season is to avoid Hospital dumpsters."- Chris Spielman

Too funny without context....I'll have the video up shortly but apparently Silva from BC is a dumpster diver. So random.

I'm pretty sure I just heard Mark Jones say the following, as UVA was going into the locker room with a 31-0 lead: "The Cavaliers come in here, and they're like, you know, your uncle that shows up to a party and has too much, and ends up putting the lampshade on his head." (Via Charles)

Wow...that's just crazy. If someone can confirm this I'd love it. Okay...it's confirmed....what in the world.

"I understand [the tree people], I've got a bit of tree hugger in me." - David Norrie, talking about the tree-sitter issue during USC-Cal (Via S2N)

"And Turner, he almost made a fatal error."- Dave Lamont

Chris Turner shall die!!!

"The Orange Bowl certainly had its day. But I'm glad they're moving out of that dump because their day was a long time ago." - Mike Patrick
"Well the day of its press box was a long time ago." - Todd Blackledge
"If you liked a place that leaked from every part of its roof, that was your building." - Mike Patrick
(Via The Unreliable Narrator)

"This is what you've got to love about Maryland, they're like sharks and chum."- Chris Spielman

I don't know why that made me laugh so much.

Posted by Awful Announcing- at 11:15 AM

38 Comments:

...."and you end up running your quarterback into the hole, it's almost like having ten blockers out there". Andy Gresh on NESN explaining a QB draw during Amherst-Williams game. Now if the QB keeps the ball dont you have 10 blockers?

Steve said...
Nov 10, 2007, 12:19:00 PM  

"Michigan can get exotic with its offense here." - Andre Ware

Someone's got some naughty thoughts on the brain.

Signal to Noise said...
Nov 10, 2007, 1:32:00 PM  

Ware..."That spells NFL on Sunday" as opposed to NFL on Wednesday? Thanks for clearing that up.

Matthew said...
Nov 10, 2007, 2:05:00 PM  

"That's their largest bulge in the game" - Eric Collins in NW/Indiana

Mookie said...
Nov 10, 2007, 2:25:00 PM  

Someone's got to send in video of Pasch & Ware gettin jiggy wit it.

Anonymous said...
Nov 10, 2007, 2:43:00 PM  

the color guy at IU-NU said after IU missed a fair catch signal for a penalty:"He either didn't see it or it was a brain fart."

Anonymous said...
Nov 10, 2007, 2:51:00 PM  

"If one Wells runs dry, try another one." - Nessler

Anonymous said...
Nov 10, 2007, 3:57:00 PM  

"They say he's money, but he almost left some change on the table with that kick." - Gary Danielson, as the Auburn kicker sneaks in a field goal.

Signal to Noise said...
Nov 10, 2007, 4:03:00 PM  

"If I'm Georgia, I'm gonna ride my hot guy right now." Gary Danielson

Gangsta D said...
Nov 10, 2007, 4:09:00 PM  

"And he is going to be dragged down by Will Smith, I mean Will Davis"...Good catch Brad

Matthew said...
Nov 10, 2007, 5:31:00 PM  

oh come on, people make slips and correct themselves during the setence all the time. that's extremely petty.

Anonymous said...
Nov 10, 2007, 5:42:00 PM  

"He would have had to pull a Louganis to avoid diving into Cox." - Verne Lundquist, as a UGA player gets called for roughing the passer.

Signal to Noise said...
Nov 10, 2007, 5:44:00 PM  

Not an announcing-based comment, but an observation.

If Vandy becomes bowl eligible, the SEC will have more bowl-eligible teams than the Pac 10 has teams.

Don't tell me the SEC isn't the best conference in the country.

Anonymous said...
Nov 10, 2007, 5:45:00 PM  

"That's not the first time I've seen him lit up" - Bob Griese in reference to Paul Maguire's mug being lit up above Ohio St. scoreboard

Jonef said...
Nov 10, 2007, 5:46:00 PM  

"It's tied 24-20 right now" - Matt Winer reporting on the ASU/UCLA game. All things math have gone straight to the toilet.

Mookie said...
Nov 10, 2007, 5:55:00 PM  

Mook, that was in reference to the Georgia game. He was good.

Nov 10, 2007, 5:56:00 PM  

Anon- I know...that's crazy. I think you'd be hard pressed for people to say the SEC isn't the best conference.

Nov 10, 2007, 5:57:00 PM  

"If Ohio State wants to win, the defense has to start playing good defense" - Bob Griese

As opposed to????

Mookie said...
Nov 10, 2007, 5:58:00 PM  

"Lingerie on the field!" - Verne Lundquist, after Knowshon Moreno scores for Georgia.

Signal to Noise said...
Nov 10, 2007, 6:08:00 PM  

"Watch Isaiah Wilson er Williams" - Paul McGuire. I hate this trio with a passion.

Mookie said...
Nov 10, 2007, 6:21:00 PM  

"Juice has matured into a fine wine right before our eyes." - Nessler

Signal to Noise said...
Nov 10, 2007, 6:26:00 PM  

"Just throw it up to the 6 foot 3 Johnson" - Dan Fouts in the UCLA/ASU game

Mookie said...
Nov 10, 2007, 6:57:00 PM  

"He forwarded it forward" - Tim Brant on the last lateral play in the UCLA/ASU game.

Mookie said...
Nov 10, 2007, 6:58:00 PM  

"The mental errrror leads to a BC Touchdown."--Lamont

A follow up to Spielman's "analysis" of BC's choice to hand the ball to the fullback on 1st and Goal from the 6, and then again on 2nd and Goal from the 1. Spielman's analysis was simply, "Grrr, Grrr, Grrr."

I don't know who gets the points, they're both definitely trying very hard.

Phil said...
Nov 10, 2007, 8:30:00 PM  

I was under the impression Louganis loved diving into cox

Steve said...
Nov 10, 2007, 8:46:00 PM  

[Looking at a pregame video of Tim Tebow in a tight shirt.]

"That's a big kid." - Mike Patrick
"Yeah." - Todd Blackledge
"That's a Todd Blackledge kind of body." - Mike Patrick
"That is not. No. Sherry Blackledge probably wishes that was a Todd Blackledge body."

Nov 10, 2007, 8:48:00 PM  

UVA color analyst Frank Quayle, after pbp man Mac McDonald inadvertently called UM the Dolphins: "That's an insult to the Hurricanes, Mac."

Bruce said...
Nov 10, 2007, 8:51:00 PM  

They also just had Quint give a report from a dumpster. Oh how I've missed BC getting the 17th string announcing crew.

Phil said...
Nov 10, 2007, 9:02:00 PM  

Too funny....that video will be up shortly Phil.

Nov 10, 2007, 9:05:00 PM  

Hell has frozen over; the 101st ranked offense in the country, UVA, leads Miami 38-0 in the 3rd quarter.

Bruce said...
Nov 10, 2007, 9:31:00 PM  

"I understand [the tree people], I've got a bit of tree hugger in me." - David Norrie, talking about the tree-sitter issue during USC-Cal

Jesus tapdancing Christ I hate him and Terry Gannon so much.

Signal to Noise said...
Nov 10, 2007, 9:31:00 PM  

Just before the last play of the UCLA-ASU game, as they were anticipating laterals from UCLA, Tim Brant remarked that they worked for Millsaps.

Um, Tim, Millsaps LOST that game.

Doof.

GlennG said...
Nov 10, 2007, 10:09:00 PM  

Mark Jones sounded like he just lost a family member during most of the second half...

Bruce said...
Nov 10, 2007, 10:23:00 PM  

The Perfect Eulogy for the Orange Bowl . . .


"The Orange Bowl certainly had its day. But I'm glad they're moving out of that dump because their day was a long time ago." - Mike Patrick

"Well the day of its press box was a long time ago." - Todd Blackledge

"If you liked a place that leaked from every part of its roof, that was your building." - Mike Patrick

Nov 10, 2007, 10:27:00 PM  

The Rams are 0-6 - Mike Patrick forgetting that they're 0-8.

Mookie said...
Nov 10, 2007, 10:48:00 PM  

I'm looking at the list, but I can't find, and never caught, the names of the guys doing the UNC-NC State game. But during an Official Review of a pass to the endzone that was dropped as the reciever hit the ground, this is what I hear:

"Thats a football play. Based on football, thats a fumble."

Amazing.

Chase said...
Nov 11, 2007, 11:58:00 AM  

"Did John Glenn have the greatest comebacks in the history of comebacks? I mean, when you think about it, right, you know, it's not like a boxer coming back or an athlete, John Glenn got back in the saddle and headed for the moon."-Charles Davis

Probably not the stupidest thing ever said in the Pam Ward Chronicles, but uh, could Charles Davis try to make more sense next time?

Eric said...
Nov 11, 2007, 12:53:00 PM  

Pam Ward repeatedly calling "The Esso Club" (Brent Musburger plugs it when he is in Clemson at least once) "The Esso Bar"...I'm in full agreement with various magazines that it is one of THE places to be on autumn Saturdays. C'mon, Pam, know where you are!! Go there and get a PBR like Brent...

Paul said...
Nov 11, 2007, 8:25:00 PM  

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