Oh yes Madden, come on baby. You know you love it.

Damn, that chili did a number on me!

Captain Morgan.

Peter King calls me Tripod

I'm crushing your helmet! I'm crushing your helmet!

/kidsinthehall

Madden and King think my shit don't stink. Let's see if they're right!

If this is a picture of the Cloverfield Monster, I'm going to be pissed.

"Dammit, Deanna says this is the only position that I can still get it up in."

Great...on top of everything, this guy can s--t helmets too

Roger Goddell: "Brett, this is a family friendly league. Put the Mouse back in the House!"

Is this how you do that "Soulja Boy" thing?

You put your left leg in, you put your left leg out...

Brett Favre, after taking the pizza delivery guy's ride to the practice field, doing the Captain Morgan's Spiced Rum stance.

he is HOT

You put your right leg down, your left leg up... tilt your head back and finish the cup! BRASS MONKEY!

Brett forgot to take off his white shorts before showing the team how his dog pees.

OK, Joe and Troy, just to let you guys know ahead of time, the easiest access is through here

"Look at Brett stretching! Ha, ha, ha! You think he's not having fun out there?! You think he's not enjoying the game?? He's stretching! That's half a smile! Boy he's one of the best!" -every NFL announcer since 1998

Favre cuts the cheese. Always a fan favorite in cheese country.

"So then Majerus lifts up his leg like this, and shows me his junk. And yes Arron, its way bigger than yours."

Cold, bold, Green Bay Packers Gold!

The fountain of youth is at the bottom of a bottle of Captain Morgan.

"So I walk in and Chmura has the chick bent over the couch and hes hittin it from the back like this."

"So Peter King bent over the bed and I positioned myself behind him with my leg up like this..."

I guess at 38, that's the fastest he can "Superman that Ho"

I'd better step quietly, that's Donald Driver's head over there, shit, I try to get the ball to him soes he won't get killed...sorry man.

Wasn't me guys, not me!

BTW, so the guy who put the noose on the cover got his ass canned?

Smoov as hell.

Now, he deserved it, Tilllman, not so much, but a little.

"oiiiiillllll caaaaaaaaan"

Brett has a little Captain in him. Do you have a little Captain in you?

Everyone has a little captin in them

Get ready Eli, the Crane is unstoppable when done correctly & thanks to Mr Meaggi I'll be ready.

These huge balls of mine force me to walk like this

There is nothing Favre won't do to help his team. Including personally fertilizing the field.

"Damn I smell like balls. I need to air the boys out."

This photo's been doctored! Few people realize that this is actually from Favre's audition for Michael Jackson's "Thriller" video.
(Take that, 1980's!)

"Billie Jean is not my lova........."

"I'm the Great Brett Favre. Come on over and toss my salad, Madden."

"You put your left leg out and then you shake it all about and that's what it's all about!"

"I got a little captain in me, do you have a little captain in you Donald Driver?"

It's a lot easier to pose in these shorts than my Wrangler premium 5 star jeans.

No gloves, Rodgers. Only those warm, clipboard holding dainties you call hands for my pocket rocket.

Do you have a little vicodi…err…captain in you?

I'm Brett Favre, and I've got a little bit of Vicodin in me.

Thanks to the invisibility potion, Peter King can finally fulfill his fantasy of blowing Brett the 50-yard line at Lambeau.

God my dance moves suck. I should have paid more attention to Peyton's Priceless Pep Talk.

Favre puts his name in the record book yet again, breaking Dan Marino's record for longest fart set during the 1984 season.

"Papaw was right, that Metamucil is the shit!"

"Yeehaw, she thinks my tractor's sexy."

"Don't you dare ask about the rugburns on my knees, or I'll kick your ass."

If only this Damn Hamstring would pull I could score another 50 Vicodins from the trainer....For tonight.

Man, that was worse than a kidney stone, lemme tell ya!

Costumed as a Rackers helmet, Peter King finally exits Favre's ass.

Brett farve preparing for his upcoming sumo match

After all these years I can shit Green Bay Packers helmets on command.

"Hey, King! don't wanna talk to you no more, you empty headed animal food trough wiper! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!"

Not content with being a first ballot shoe-in for the football Hall of Fame, Brett Favre demonstrates a gait that he hopes to ride into the Ministry of Silly Walks Hall of Fame.

Goddamn chimichangas.

Also,

More beans Mr. Taggert?

I think you've had enough Brett.

"You put your left foot in, you put your left foot out, tou put your left foot in and then you shake it all about....You do the hokey pokey and you turn yourself around, that's what it's all about!"

"You're gonna spit lightning and crap out Packers helmets!"

*insert Captain Morgan reference here*

Man, I really dropped a turd with that last pass.