Create The Caption #309

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

(Usually) Everyday I'll throw out a photo, you provide the caption, and then hilarity ensues. I'm also adding a handful of links at the bottom of the page that you should check out each day.

Yesterday's Winners....


"My name is Jose Calderon. You killed my father. Now, prepare to die."- Anon

"Calderon: Mortal Kombat, on Sega Genesis, is the best video game ever.
Garnett: I disagree, it's a very good game, but i think Donkey Kong is the best game ever.
Calderon: Donkey Kong sucks.
Garnett: You know something? YOU SUCK!"
- Topher

"Say hallo to my little friend!"- Anon

"Kevin Garnett attempts to peacefully explain to an angry Jose Caldreon that he will NOT put him on his NBA 2K9 team."- Anon
_______________________________________

On the heels of the previous post, are you funny enough to create a caption for this photo of Terrell Owens signing copies of his latest book "T.O.'s Finding Fitness" at the Sports Museum of America, in New York yesterday?


Daily Links:

Remembering Herb Score (Cleveland Plain Dealer)
The Mavs Have Some Internal Issues (Dallas Basketball)
Even The Original Songwriter Can't Stand "Saved By Zero" (Stuck In The 80s)
A Look Inside The Islanders' Blogger Box (SMJ)
Celebrity Sightings (The Sports Hernia)
Fred Smooth Never Fails To Deliver (WaPo)
Blog Puts Up Billboards In Cincy Asking For A Bengals GM (Who Dey Revolution)
Inside The Head Of Charlie Weis (Tirico Suave)
Who He Play For? (NESW Sports)
Do You Have Tickets To Al Horford's Gun Show? (Ball Don't Lie)

Posted by Awful Announcing- at 12:33 PM

58 Comments:

TO: Hey kids, I have $25 million reasons to live. What about You?

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 12:40:00 PM  

"Joey, have you ever seen a grown man naked."

walnuts said...
Nov 12, 2008, 12:40:00 PM  

Kids: So TO, what is Jessica Simpson like?

TO: She's fine.

Kids: Do you like her boobs, because we do.

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 12:45:00 PM  

"Joey, have you ever been to a Turkish prison?"

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 12:48:00 PM  

Boys, let me I tell ya, I have so much in common with you rich white kids.

E Buzz said...
Nov 12, 2008, 12:51:00 PM  

TO: So how many franchises do you want to implode when you grow up?

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 12:53:00 PM  

TO: We lost so many good men out there.
Kid: Playing with the Cowboys?
TO: Yes, with the Cowboys, you lose good men to trades and unruly fans. Look I don't want to talk about it. I'm sorry. No comment.

Unknown said...
Nov 12, 2008, 12:56:00 PM  

TO: Which one of you is the quarterback?

Kid in front: Me

TO (to the other 2): If you ever get in trouble, blame him.

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 12:59:00 PM  

Kid in the middle: "TO, my mommy says she'd like to play with your Alabama Black Snake, but she doesn't want to deal with all your shit afterwards. What's she talking about?"

foos said...
Nov 12, 2008, 1:01:00 PM  

Kids, the key to a solid fitness routine is doing sit ups and curls shirtless in your driveway in front of the media. It gives you motivation.

Michael said...
Nov 12, 2008, 1:13:00 PM  

Not pictured: Drew Rosenhaus behind T.O. repeatedly telling the kids "next question".

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 1:17:00 PM  

Kid: I mean, I just feel like, you know, I'm not being involved in the offense enough...I mean, these guys just don't understand man...Gotta get me involved man...

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 1:17:00 PM  

Kid #1: "When I grow up, I wanna be just like you."
T.O.: "You callin' me a slow possession receiver?"

Nov 12, 2008, 1:20:00 PM  

I like you kid. If you were my quarterback in 2004 instead of McNabb, I would have won the Super Bowl.

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 1:25:00 PM  

Kid: "What's this scribble you just put on our books Mr. Owens?"

TO: "You can talk about my handwriting, but if you do that, it's really not fair, it's unfair. That's my autograph man. That's my signature. And if you guys do that, that's unfair."

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 1:34:00 PM  

You like you some you? Well that's a pretty stupid saying.

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 1:36:00 PM  

Why aren't I at practice today? Well, you see, they don't get me the ball enough so we stink and now I'm just waiting until next year. See kids, just remember, you can NEVER get enough!

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 1:39:00 PM  

"I did as you asked, Mr. Owens. I went up to Jeff Garcia and quacked. Now, why is that funny?"

Jeremiah said...
Nov 12, 2008, 1:45:00 PM  

Let me give you kids a piece of advice: Don't be like Jeff Garcia.

GMoney said...
Nov 12, 2008, 1:47:00 PM  

little kid: "So with my allowance I now have three reasons a week to not kill myself."

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 1:49:00 PM  

Not Picture: T.O.'s other book: "How to make friend: Sobbing and fake crying your way into your QB's heart"

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 2:00:00 PM  

Punt, pass and kick champion huh? 7-8 age group? ... sure, I think you could backup Romo.

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 2:18:00 PM  

Election day is right around the corner, be sure you go out and vote.

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 2:25:00 PM  

TO: First, I walked through the seven layers of crazy forest, passed the the sea of twirly swirly self-loathing, and then I walked through DFW and met the limo driver Mr. Jones sent for me!

Kids: Oooowwww!

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 2:29:00 PM  

Hey TO, does this book include your steady diet of bulshit to the media?

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 2:40:00 PM  

TO, will this book keep me in check with my mental health like when you took all those pills at your home then played the next week?

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 2:42:00 PM  

Jacob: You addressed it to Terrell.
T.O.: Your name is not Terrell, too? Sorry. I love me some me too much.
Dad: Let's go get our popcorn ready, son.

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 3:09:00 PM  

Remember Kids Show up to practice every day... unless you're renegotiating

W_Rabb said...
Nov 12, 2008, 3:49:00 PM  

Kid - "Dad said you'd have popcorn ready....where is it you crying wuss."

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 3:59:00 PM  

Look man, You can listen to Jimi but you can't hear him. There's a difference man. Just because you're listening to him doesn't mean you're hearing him.

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 4:26:00 PM  

kid: my daddy says that you are overrated and a clubhouse cancer

T.O.: Well what now?

Dad: uhhh son lets go get some ice cream

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 4:27:00 PM  

Preparing for his postfootball career, Terrel Owens shots the pilot for his show, Dr. T.O.

Kid 1: well i just feel that the Q.B. doesnt get me the ball enough


T.O.: well just call him out in the media, it works for me all the time

Kid 2: HEY! man thats my quarterback, My quarterback, thats just not fair man, Thats My quarterback

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 4:33:00 PM  

Your a quarterback? then I'll play with you.

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 5:03:00 PM  

Kid: Some Jamaican guy just walked by and said something about you not being able to hold his jock...what does that mean?

TO: (Sniff) That's really unfair.

Hubbo said...
Nov 12, 2008, 6:15:00 PM  

Terrell Owens listens intently as Pee Wee players explain how an NFL player should act on and off the field.

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 6:18:00 PM  

Terrell Owens (responding to the kid's question): "No, I don't think I should help you 'make it rain' in a strip club with Pac Man Jones."

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 6:20:00 PM  

Terrell Owens plays "Are You More Mature Than A 5th Grader?" and loses.

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 6:21:00 PM  

Yeah, kid, I know the rest of the team is practicing, but I've got to be here. You just gave me 20 more reasons to live. Next!

MMayes said...
Nov 12, 2008, 6:32:00 PM  

Kid: This is my first time in a museum.

T.O. No kidding, mine too.

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 7:12:00 PM  

Hey TO, can I borrow 1000 reasons to live?

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 7:21:00 PM  

"Now listen here, kids: You see that picture on the cover of my book? The cops ask you to stand like that when you break the law like most professional athletes. Don't be like most professional athletes."

Lando said...
Nov 12, 2008, 7:25:00 PM  
This comment has been removed by the author.
JamesCraven said...
Nov 12, 2008, 8:23:00 PM  

Kid: "Surely you can't be serious."

T.O.: "I am serious...and don't call me Shirley."

JamesCraven said...
Nov 12, 2008, 8:24:00 PM  

Dammit, Owens, you are killing me in my fantasy league.

Mal said...
Nov 12, 2008, 8:55:00 PM  

It's a pleasure to meet you Mr. Cinco.

Mal said...
Nov 12, 2008, 8:56:00 PM  

Mr. Owens, how many of these Sharpies can you stuff in your socks?

Mal said...
Nov 12, 2008, 9:01:00 PM  

I hope you kids enjoy reading this because, hey, I can't!

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 11:01:00 PM  

T.O.: "You know kid, I can't even see that blonde girl over your dads shoulder's face, but damn she's sexy.

Kid in front: " OH MY GOSH:

Dad (while reaching in for the book): Time to go kids.

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 11:08:00 PM  

"T.O.'s Finding Fitness?" I thought you were signing copies of "The Idiot's Guide to Being a Self-Aggrandizing, Franchise-Killing, Locker Room Cancer"!

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 11:29:00 PM  

Kid in the middle: "Wait a minute. I know you. You're Terrell Owens. You play football for the Dallas Cowboys! I think you're the greatest, but my dad says you don't get enough separation from the cornerbacks. And he says lots of times, you don't even run out the routes."

T.O.: "The hell I don't. LISTEN KID. I've been hearing that crap ever since I was at San Fran. I'm out there busting my buns every Sunday. Tell your old man to lock up and try to beat Shawn Springs for 60 minutes."

Just keeping the "Airplane" gag going...

Anonymous said...
Nov 12, 2008, 11:37:00 PM  
This comment has been removed by the author.
Justin F. said...
Nov 12, 2008, 11:54:00 PM  
This comment has been removed by the author.
JamesCraven said...
Nov 12, 2008, 11:58:00 PM  

Joey, have you ever seen a gladiator movie...?

Just adding to the Airplane! quotes...

JamesCraven said...
Nov 13, 2008, 12:04:00 AM  

"Any of you kids ever work as a publicist? What I'm really looking for is a girl from [ TENNESSEE ]
FEMALE. She is orange crazy. The ice tray in her orange fridge, that freezes the water she dyes orange, is that orange. The party girl cowboy hat she wears is a white and orange zebra print. The tattoo on her lower back is Pantone 3 for that Tennessee orange. The only thing that's not orange is her dog, which is the mascot Smokey. Did we mention she's crazy? A slutty girl who would hang out at the cowgirl hall of fame."

Anonymous said...
Nov 13, 2008, 3:03:00 AM  

Mister TO, the cover of your book makes us all feel funny... downstairs.

Lammy742 said...
Nov 13, 2008, 7:38:00 AM  

TO: So, who should I make it out to?
Kid: Well the Cowboys are my favorite team and you're my favorite player of all time.
TO: Ah I know exactly what to write. "To my biggest fan, Little Joey Douchebag. Never stop chasing that dark blue bandwagon. TO."

Lammy742 said...
Nov 13, 2008, 7:44:00 AM  

And continuing with the Airplane! quotation extravaganza...

First kid: "Looks like I picked the wrong day to give up chocolate milk drinking."

Second kid: "Looks like I picked the wrong day to give up sugary snack eating."

Third kid: "Looks like I picked the wrong day to give up cheating on my homework."

T. O.: "Looks like I picked the wrong day to give up smoking, drinking, pill popping and sniffing glue."

JamesCraven said...
Nov 13, 2008, 9:33:00 AM  

Sure I'll play on your team, kids. Just make sure every play call is a pass to me.

Steve Holtje said...
Nov 13, 2008, 10:44:00 AM  

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