No caption needed.

If there is a lord, than this is Manny's replacment...please lord let this be Manny's replacement.

Yes, actually I am very flexible you are the first person to ever ask me that.

Dustin Pedroia dreams about the midgets they could make...

I don't know who that tall girl is, but if she thinks that silver medal is going get her my job she's got another thing coming. -Pedroia

Only Dustin Pedroia noticed a rabid and angry Keith Hernandez running towards the dugout muttering under his breath, "back to the kitchen..."

Hey, baby ... see how I can keep the bat standing straight up without using my hands???

What?

You say I look familiar?

Do you perhaps... remember... one magical summer day... my face... and your fist... met on youtube?

Francona: So, you choked in primetime when the rest of your teammates needed you and now you still want to be a celebrity with all the VIP perks? Are you sure you're not looking for A-Rod?

Francona: Well, Alicia, we both know a lot about flopping this season, don't we? Where's Manu Ginobili? We could have a party.

Check this out, I do a mean Ed Koch...

No - I'm not kidding - you have a better arm than Damon...

Terry: No he is our second baseman.
Alica: OH, well his is so small and cute I just knew he had to be your son the bat boy.

From deep inside the mind of Dustin Pedroia: "If I look at her face in a serious way, maybe she'll blow me...Don't laugh, asshole, I'm the one who's going to fuck her...There's no way she'll fuck coach with a face like he has...I am the fucking man."

Pedroia thought bubble,

"I'd hit it! I hit everyuthing these days!"

KWBoston

"As soon as the roofies kick in, I'm going to ream her right out with this bat. Yes I am."

Whoever is sitting next to Pedroia's right notices his emerging stiffy.

Francona: Did you know this guys initials are "DP"?

DP: "I thought gymnasts were supposed to be short. She's just as tall as me."

Pedroia: Her taco would go great with my salsa...

Francona: You shut it. You shut it right now! I'm sick of you. Get out of my dugout.

(He looks pissed in the picture)

Pedroia prepares to tell Sacramone that he bets she could manhandle him with those broad shoulders just as Francona stops him with an admonition of "Wanna go to the Dodgers? Shut it!".

Francona/Sacramone (singing): "Islands in the stream/that is what we are/no one in between/ how cn we be wrong/sail away with me/to another world..."

Pedroia: "I was gonna sing Nine to Five next. There goes that shit..."

Pedroia: Good thing Manny isn't still here.. or I know what he'd try to use the Green Monster for in between innings...

Ortiz, laying on dugout floor: "Hay, midget woman: check ou' de real Big Papi."

Sacramone: "Eww."

It's August, jerk, you can probably lose the jacket.

Is this a bat or are you just happy to see me?

Pedroia: "Ms. Sacramone, what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this dugout is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul."

Seriously, who are you again? Are you the one that put us up in that Ramada in Cleveland? Doesn't Theo need a cup of coffee or something?

Pedroia's Inner-thoughts: I wonder what her head would look like on a stick?

A puzzled Dustin Pedroia looks on as Alicia Sacramone, mistaking manager Terry Francona for 1980s rock icon Steve Perry, belts out a heartfelt rendition of "Oh Sherrie" in the Red Sox dugout.

Dustin Pedroia: "Miss Silverstone, I can't tell you how much I loved you in the movie 'Clueless'"

Terry Francona: "Yeah, we're all big fans of your music, Hannah Montana."

It's just Alicia being Alicia.

...and this one time, in Beijing.

Alright get the hell out of here, Sacramone! All that sex talk is making Pedroia catatonic.

pedroia ponders how many ways alicia could kick his ass

"Is she really hot, or just gymnastics hot?"

AS: "You know, I played second base in high school."

DP: "Funny."

I saw that video of you punching some dude at Brown. I'll give you $20 if you go beat the shit out of Manny.

I'd like to run a squeeze play on her.

Terry: Wow, Erin's little sister is pretty hot!

That Short Guy: That's not Erin's little sister, Terry.

Terry: Well, that blows that fantasy straight to hell.

Chris Hansen: Come take a seat here gentlemen.


Sacremone: It's okay, I'm 20.


Hansen: Get the **** out of my way you pansy 2nd place Boston punks.

So uh... turn around and let's see what's doing back there. Didn't get the chance watching the Olympics, it was always touching the ground.

A silver medalist? Yeah, that would count as a "slump buster".

Dude, Manny what the fuck did you do to yourself out in L.A.?

Francona: "For the last time, I did NOT star in A Nightmare on Elm Street!"

Alicia: "OMGSHUTUP!"

...And this is why Dustin Pedroia is having one of best hitting streaks of his career.

Francona: you did a terrible floor routine in the olympics

Sacramone: i did a great routine

Pedrioa: id love to see her do a floor routine in my apartment

pedrioa: thank god theres a girl here now no one will suspect that i just took three viagra's

Dude at the edge of the picture (Jacoby Ellsbury?) whispering to Pedroia: "Just play it cool. I'll give her your 'Guess who likes you?' note before she goes to lunch."

Pedroia thinks about the brighter side of being called a jockey by Oswaldo Guillen.

Alicia, Look out, Al Troutwig! NOT!

Oh, that's Alicia Sacramone. I didn't recognize her not falling down.

Ms. Sacramone: I personally believe that U.S. Americans are unable to do so because some people out there in our nation don't have maps and I believe that our education like such as in South Africa and the Iraq -- everywhere like such as, and I believe that they should... our education over here in the U.S. should help the U.S. -- or should help South Africa and should help the Iraq and the Asian countries so we will be able to build up our future.

Dustin Pedroia in his best Ivan Drago voice, "I must break you."