MJD - Welcome to the Broncos/Raiders segment of the liveblog ... doing the play-by-play on ESPN is Mike Greenberg, who is like a more feminine Pam Ward.

from MJD's liveblog on Yahoo

AA, you just said there was a football game and then said the Oakland Raiders were playing.....please fix the error.

"Mike Shanahan's gone into the playbook again." - Mike Ditka


WOW!

"He's a fine pass-receiver out of the backfield" - Greenberg

also...

"Cutler goes short...." - Greenberg. On a 14 yard completion on first down.

I think the reason Greeny doesn't work as a PBPer is his high-pitched voice. It's not something he can help, unfortunately. I think it's the same reason Bryant Gumbel wasn't any good for NFLN. They just don't sound right calling a football game.

What the hell happened to Dick Vermeil? Its like all other announcing options were out so espn decided to scrape the bottom of the "lousy" barrel.

@Anon 10:29, what's wrong with saying Pittman's a good pass-receiver out of the backfield?? That's actually a very literal and accurate description. He didn't say "wide receiver", he said "pass receiver."

I can't decide if Ditka's brain moves too fast for his mouth, or his mouth moves too fast for his brain.

Mike Ditka is an abomination as an announcer.

Greenberg sounds like the leprechaun from the Coors Light commercial.

jay, i think it's the scotch moves too fast through his mouth for his brain to keep up with what then comes out his mouth.

I've determined that I don't like the new on-screen scoreboard either. Yes, we know we are watching MNF on ESPN, there is no need for that at the very bottom. Also, please keep the display consistent with down/distance, score, and over all time. It is annoying the way they keep taking some of the elements away.

NBC and CBS have the best scoreboards IMO.

Greenberg tried to sound excited about that touchdown pass and show some emotion in his voice, and he failed miserably. Something tells me you could kick him in the nuts as hard as you can and his boring voice pitch wouldn't change.

Greenberg: He's got a hole...here he comes!

The Raiders do not look good.

Maybe McFadden can play defense, too.

"When you don't get touched, that means you've got excellent blocking". - Mike Golic.

Stupendous analysis.

Justin Griffith did not introduce the lineups Greeney.

Wow, this announcing blows. They make Tirico look good. ESPN cross-promotion needs to be rethought.

"They were 30th against the rush last year" - Mike Golic

"And there are 32 teams". - Mike Greenberg

I would have sworn the NFL had 35 teams...

If the Raiders D starts playing badly they should start throwing cookies and candybars at Jay Cutler.

Ditka's reaction to that 3rd down measurement was hilarious.

lammy742, that's the comment of the night.

I think Ditka's cerebellum just fused.

Oh Bill Leavy is the ref?


He should know everything about the ball crossing the line.

Raider offense > Raider defense

"That is a good looking athlete" -Golic

Yep, that's Oakland....football.

Golic's commentary is priceless. I couldn't tell whether he was having an orgasm or a seizure when the Broncos recovered the ball just now. "Ohhhh...ohhhhhh...they got the ball...they got it...ohhhhhhh"

Too much coffee for Greenberg, he needs to take it down a notch

Are they watching the same game that we are watching? Greenie/Golic, stick to your srupid talk show that nobody watches.

Wow, the horrible execution of that Raiders play was instantly topped by all three announcers trying to talk while the producer is trying to send it to commercial.

This sounds too much like two dudes and a chick talking at a bar. "Ooh he got drilled!" "He got it" "Here he comes"

Stick to radio, you are much better at that.

This commentary sounds like three stoned freshmen are doing the broadcast from their dorm room. Great job, ESPN.

Thought I'd tune into the game in between innings of the Dodger game and it took me 2 plays to be completely annoyed by the broadcast crew. I won't be turning back, with all the people employed at the WWL, you'd think they could at least come up with two non-annoying ones to provide entertainment for a crappy matchup.

I WANT BRAD NESSLER NOW!

AA, do YOU know how a TV works?

WHAT? THE YELLOW LINE IS NOT ON THE FIELD? WOW!!

After listening to these clowns do the game, heck, I'd even take Dennis Miller back.

It could be debated at times, Jay.

Golic talks over the official. Don't you learn not to do that, like, as soon as they tell you you're an announcer?

This may be the worst broadcasting team ever.

How about McDonalds making fun of metrosexuals?

"I almost bought a beret the other day!"

Solid.

Another whisky sour for Mr. Ditka, stat.

All three would benefit from have a vocal filter installed in their heads. Not everything you think needs to be verbalized. Give me Buck and Aikman.

If Comedy Central got a hold of this crew, it could be a great show. They could do like a MST3K takeoff, where they show old football games, and Golic, Grennburg, and Ditka just shout random shit at the screen.

IT'S GOLD, JERRY! GOLD, I TELL YA!

"I was watching Johnson run down." - Mike Golic

Did Greenberg just say "Oh my" during that kickoff return? Thats not so bad except his voice made him sound like he was 83 and has a vagina.

@anon, 10:54

It's both, but in the future he could conceivably improve #1, but he will always have the same voice. For some reason it works on radio, but not for football PBP.

Mike Greenburg is man that looks like a lesbian.

Greenie certainly sucks at play by play... atleast he hasn't started to stutter yet. And he does not hace a strong enough voice for p by p.

I only watch their morning show for comic relief. It is so hilariously awful that my laughter wakes me up.

This is horrible. You're telling me they couldn't use Simmons, Berry, and Schatz. (three every-day Joe's that watch the game like everyone else) Heck, they could have taken three fans from the ESPNZone who could have done a better job then these clowns.

Young quarterback...spoonfed.... I think Greenie found his theme.

Is there an SAP audio available for this? I wouldn't understand a word, but it has to be superior to the Mike-menage

Since Russell isn't allowed to throw, shouldn't the Raiders just go to the 2-Back/No QB formation 100%.

"OOOOOHHHHHHH MAAAAAAANNNNNNN!!!!" -Legend of the Booth

"OOHHH..MAN!" -- Ditka

He totally wanted to say "OH SHIT!"

Kiffin looks like a 9 year old throwing a hissy-fit after the dropped pass.

Ditka is just yelling at random now.

If the Raiders quit on the run one more time, Ditka is going to bleed from his eyes.

Just mute the TV or give it a shot at pbp yourself so that you can talk over Mike cubed.

Golic: "When he rolls out, he goes to that side of the ride."

Genius!

Where does Greenie get his quips? PBP for Dummies?

Its in my blood to dispise all things Dallas Cowboys, but my hatered of Romo knows no bounds!

How about a booth of the Geico Gecko, The Skin-It Girl, and the Doctor from the orbitz commercials? They could probably do better PBP than this

Greenberg couldn't believe that the Raiders defense was so lax on Cutler's pass into the end zone. Maybe that's because everyone in the stadium except for Greenberg KNEW THE PLAY WAS COMING BACK.

It could be worse, you could be living in Seattle and having Mike Patrick butcher the Oklahoma/UW game.

Answer: Stu Scott, Emmitt and Steve Young

Question: Are there three men more annoying than the three Mikes?

Jay Cutler is good outside of the pocket by the way, in case these guys haven't told you 50 times already.

Pam Ward on pbp, with Emmitt Smith as analyst, and halftime math lessons weith Andre Ware.

The main reason that this broadcast sucks is that all three commentators are living in the moment and sound like they have no grip on the perspective of professional athletes. Example: Scheffler isn't "going to be sick" about failing to haul in a tough catch on his back in the end zone. He's going to get back up to the line and play again. If the players were behaving like the commentators, we'd have a 30 minute therapy session after every dead ball.

SSR, I think I broke out in a cold sweat just reading that.

Scheffler is actually thinking "ESPN has these clowns calling the game... wtf"

@pm: Actually, the answer to your question would just be "yes."

I like ssreporters' booth.

What makes that doubly bad, kleinias, is that two of them played the game, one at a HOF level.

Better yet!


Emmitt Smith on pbp with Tony as analyst!

LOL they're already promoting next week's game.

Do we have to talk about Cowboys Eagles in the 2ND QUARTER!!!???

pm, that's why I'm so shocked...Golic and Ditka are just being totally silly.

When did Michael Pittman become a better choice at the goal line than Selvin Young?

Bring Back McFadden at QB...My goodness

Interesting stat, but the Raiders haven't scored on Monday Night Football since 2005, and they've been on MNF every year since.

Watching this game it really feels as if Mike & Mike are broadcasting the game from Bristol. Whatever it is, it just doesn't feel like they are actually at the game.

Emmitt Smith on pbp would be the end of TV sports.

I wish Greenberg wouldn't treat us all as if we were 5 years old. Does the same thing on the radio too

Anyone else think that Jamarcus Russell will be a huge bust?

They should tape up Ditka right now. Or just devote an entire segment to him on how to scratch an itching crotch.

I'm off to bedfordshire. Bad football + bad annoncing + empty scotch glass = bed time.

Emmitt: And the pass from DaMarcus Russell is throwed incom...inplete...complete intended for Indian Cur....Donald...Ronald Curry...no Donald Curry. It's 4th and 5..no wait it's 2nd and 6. Oh it's baaaaad.

@Anon 11:20

It's still way early, but it's not looking good so far for Ja-Russ.

Like our esteemed announcers pointed out, it is still essentially his rookie year. How'd that hold out work for ya? Plenty of time and money for hideous sweaters

Stupid is as stupid does... Ditka has his moments

Eddie Royal's looking like a nice fantasy surprise this year. (Already taken in my league, though)

Golic: Young kids, you catch the ball with your hands just like he did it.

Young kids? Its like 11:30 at night. No kid is still up watching this garbage!

DeAngelo Hall should just leave the NFL.

I think ditka was refering to his broadcast partners.

great photo @ top of page...nice grab of the 'nads by Ditka!!!

can greenie show atleast a little emotion on the TD call?

@lammy742

Well, it IS Denver vs. Oakland, so it's only 8:30pm in California and 9:30pm in Colorado....

Greenie gets surprised by a run for a touchdown? He called the pin-ball AFL. He should be used to TDs being scored.

We interrupt your regularly scheduled broadcast to bring you this important public announcement: "I've never seen more fans wearing NFL paraphenalia. These are the best fans" We now return from this detour down Ditka Drive

I wonder if Greenberg will still defend blogs if the blogosphere is ripping him limb from limb.

Greenberg: The Raiders need to get something on the board before halftime.

REALLY?

I wish Erin Andrews was calling this game

The Raiders, at some point, have to stop looking like a D-IAA school on offense.

@Jay

oops, sorry about the east coast bias there.

Standard response to a big play by Greeny or Golic: "Oh!" It's as if they forgot they were at a football game.

And to think, the Raiders are going to do this 16 times.

That play sums up the raiders game thus far

"Raiders have to use a timeout as the play clock was going down on them..."

-Mike Greenberg

Ditka again missed the commercial cue. Talks right over it.

"2nd and forever" pls don't adlib, just give us the numbers. thx

Is this a football game or a 3 ring circus

greeny's intro to the game after commercial break feels like he's opening his radio show, god kill me now

@ Anon

He doesn't know the yardage. Better to say forever then just guess at the number!

They need to do booth cut ins during the commercial break like PTI. That'd make for better TV than the junk we're watching now.

Is Mike times 3 calling the game on a 5 second tape delay or something?

Note to Raiders, draft better linesmen next season... you've wasted enough picks on skill positions.

Ditka: I'd like to think this could get better but I really don't see it right now...

Oh, how right you are my friend

How did Dikta coach a team to the Super Bowl?

Ditka again has a point that they are working on the two-minute drill. Another indictment of the idiocy of the preseason.

Ditka is in his own world..talking over greeny time after time. I'm fully entertained :)

Poor Mike Greenberg. "They could stop the clock if they want, couldn't they Coach? [Ditka mumbles something unimportant and unintelligible.] ... [Raiders have an incomplete pass.]

Greenberg: "So they stop the clock."

Ditka: You remember when Eddie Pipp got hurt, a guy named Lou Gehrig took over.

And then Ditka says they aren't punting it....deep in their own terriotiry with 32 seconds left... No wonder he isn't coaching.

"When you give up, that's when you lose." - Ditka. Epic. Pitiful.

Wow that was one of the worst halves of offense I've ever seen by the Raiders.

I like how espn's ticker is still saying Brady out for the season is "breaking news" yeah, like 8 hours ago it was breaking news.

Someone alert Lane Kiffin that the preseason has ended.

lammy, the reason that ESPN is still running the infinite loop Tom Brady injury alert is because 15% of ESPN's production team still isn't Very Sad About Tom Brady's Injury.

not surprised they start off with Favre/Jets highlights....the lovefest continues.

Cassell's success will prove that Brady's success is the product of a great coach & system. Tom Brady is one overrated lucky bastard.

"Are you ready for some football?" Yes, we're still waiting.

I want Erin Andrews on the sideline.

Mike Ditka is just hilarious I think he's the best color because he's the only one who tells it like it is and has the background to do it.

I know it's considerably after the fact. But didn't one of those yokels say that young receivers should catch the ball with their hands? Gee .. and here I thought the face or the rear end were good ideas.

Diabetic smack is pretty gay. Cutler is an inspiration to millions who suffer from the disease.

I am crazy fan of sports. I love to Watch Monday Night Football Online with my father. I'm always be excited to watch its new one episode. I like Tony Kornheiser. He always play well. This became very interesting show when there is matchup between our favorite Teams.